Just One Of The Millions

“What are you making that mean about you?” I asked
“That I’m not good enough. That I’m not valuable”.
She continued, “I’m embarrassed to be in this position. When I go to interviews, how can I explain why I’ve been out of work for so long? Maybe they’re right; maybe I’m not good enough”

The national unemployment rate is hovering just above 9% and although the economy is recovering, there are still many Americans out of work. Eight million jobs were lost when our economy shut down just a few months ago and it will take some time to repair the damage. What is making the situation worse however is our own individual viewpoint. When you make your unemployment status say something about you (usually a negative thought), rather than the situation as a whole, you perpetuate the situation and change becomes more difficult.

So I ask, what are you making the label “unemployed” mean about you? The first step to overcoming the things that are getting in our way is to recognize them.

What do you believe about unemployed people?
Who are they?
What have they done or not done?
What do you think your friends and family think about you? How about potential employers?
How do you feel when someone asks you what you do and you have to say “I’m unemployed”?
How are you feeling about you?

It is next to impossible to completely separate our private lives from our professional ones and so I can guarantee that you are feeling the impact at home as well. When you are unhappy in one segment of your life, those feelings impact other parts as well. How is your current state of unemployment impacting other areas of your life? How are you interacting and treating your family? Your partner? Are you spending time with friends and enjoying your life or are you hiding away?

There is a tremendous amount of pressure to succeed in our culture. It’s all about going to the right school, climbing the corporate ladder and getting that corner office. This is such a cultural norm that we often place our self worth and value on the position that we hold or the status of the company who employs us. When we define who we are only by what we do, we are acknowledging just a fraction of the bigger picture. Worse, when we are unable to find work and our days become ruled by fear and embarrassment, our self image and value can be reduced to nothing.

“So, are they right? Are you not good enough?” I asked.
“Well no. I am good enough, but they don’t know that.” She responded. Then there was silence.
“But I guess the only way for them to know is if I tell them. So even when things are uncertain, I have to believe in myself. I have to put down my fear and trust.”
When we want the outside to change, we’ve got to change the inside first. The thoughts we have are based on what we are making a situation mean about ourselves (I’m not good enough). Those thoughts create feelings, which in turn create action or in-action. And the action or in-action of our daily lives is what I call reality.
So I ask you, what are you making “it” mean about you?