Learning To Tell Yourself The Truth

The pain was almost too much to handle. I didn’t know how I got here. Was he the same man who wined and dined me, proposed to me, loved me? How could he be hurting me like this?

“I have a certain way I want my fiancé to look,” he said.

I looked at my outfit. The bright colors I had chosen to wear were out of character for me, but I thought I looked nice. But instead of greeting me with his usual hug and a smile, when I walked out the building he threw a bomb: “What do you have on? Pajamas?”

I was so confused, but I didn’t want to lose him. I couldn’t believe someone who looked like him, wanted someone like me. So, with tears in my eyes, I said:

“I want to be what you want!”
His body was still stiff when we hugged goodbye. The verbal abuse and control only increased after that.

We went on like that for another year. I wasn’t happy in the relationship and my dreams of true love were shattered. But I felt like I couldn’t let it go. “At least I have somebody,” I thought.

The only way I was able to break free from this bad dream was to tell myself the truth, the truth about this situation and the truth about myself.

You see, I had begun to believe that I was worthless, ugly, not good enough, too fat, too flirtatious—everything but the truth.

It took my family and friends constantly speaking the truth over me, telling me the truth about myself and about the type of relationship I was in. I wasn’t always ready to accept the truth, but one day I believed it, and I walked away from the abuse for good.

Maybe you’re in a similar situation right now. Maybe you find yourself in a relationship with someone who doesn’t treat you right. Maybe they’re telling you they love you, but they’re not committing to you. Maybe you’ve seen the signs that nothing you’ll ever do will make this relationship work. Or, maybe you’ve been through hurts and the pain of those memories has you chained to your past so that you are afraid to love again.

Let me tell you the truth.

You are amazing. You deserve to be treated with respect and love. You are beautiful. You are valuable. You are accepted and you are loved. You are a princess who was designed to be protected by a prince who will not hold you back, desert you, or abandon you, but who will support you, cover you, and never leave you.

And one day, you WILL find the love you deserve. Until then, please tell yourself the truth.