Love or Lust at First Sight

Intimacy and Dating Advice 101: In our modern society there is a great disconnect in the dating world. What is it? Its how men and women view love, and lust. This is important for many reasons, but none more important than communication. It is plain and simple, communicate better and your relationship will grow. However, neither sex really understands where the other is coming from, and this creates misunderstandings - and broken hearts. When you watch love in movies, sometimes it seems so simple. Boy meets girl, boy has instant and powerful chemistry with girl, and they form a lifelong relationship. While this is ideal, it just doesn't happen like that for everyone. Often something goes wrong or something is misinterpreted and, well you can take it from there. When you're single and dating and meeting others who are doing the same, you may have subconsciously different expectations about how that connection is supposed to happen. Many women believe in love at first sight. They assume that they will know when they meet the right person and everything will magically fall into place. Many men subscribe to this notion too, thinking that they will just know when they've met the right one. What they both mean by the “right one” is very different though, and that is the key. Women are biologically programmed to fall in love through attraction, chemistry, and love-making (sex). If they are physically intimate with a man, they release the bonding hormone and become attached. Additionally, they are programmed to search for relationship material right from the get-go. Men, on the other hand, do not view physical intimacy as something so special and important. They can have multiple partners without getting attached, moving from one to another until they’ve found that special someone. It is important to note that these are just generalizations of course, though I feel there is much accuracy here. Guys need to be aware that most women seek relationships. They need to understand and internalize the fact that if a girl is being intimate with them, it means there is a great level of physical attraction. With this attraction, comes the signal that “this guy might be the one.” That's why when there is a lot of chemistry; women really fall hard. That is a practical definition of “love at first sight.” Unfortunately, guys don't always see this in the same way. Men need to be aware that the way they view women is not how women view themselves. Guys think that if a woman jumps in bed with them quickly, that she's not serious. They scrap her from their 'potential mate' list and move on to the next. Similarly, guys may not value sex as highly as women do and partake in the act without thinking of the potential meanings behind it. Guys need to value and appreciate strong chemistry when they find it. It is not that easy to find, and you don’t just have it with everyone. Don't you think that nature also designed chemistry to be the attraction between two individuals? It's the basis from which you can build something deeper. So, instead of judging or being afraid of a situation when a man has strong physical chemistry with a woman, he should embrace this chance. - Stella Check Out Stella Singles Today!