Not Your Run-of-the-Mill Thank You Note: The Importance of Gratitude Letters

I remember learning to write thank you notes as a child. I thought I was being schooled in manners. But I’ve realized that the greatest benefits of expressing gratitude are not about social etiquette at all. rnPeople who keep regular gratitude journals are physically, healthier, more emotionally connected and balanced, more focused and energetic and have better sleep quality than people who do not keep a gratitude journal, according to a recent study by Dr. Robert Emmons of the University of California. A long-term researcher of gratitude, happiness and emotional health, Dr. Emmons also states that gratitude journal writers are more likely make progress toward their academic, interpersonal and health-based goals. rnEven before Oprah, we’ve always suspected the benefits of gratitude. Now they are clearly backed by clinical research. How much does gratitude matter? Dr. Emmons’ statistics show that people are 25% happier if they keep gratitude journals, sleep ½ hour more per evening, and exercise 33% more each week. Journal writers achieve up to a 10% reduction in systolic blood pressure, and decrease their dietary fat intake by up to 20%. Lives marked by frequent positive emotions of joy, love and gratitude are up to seven years longer than lives bereft of these pleasant feelings. The science of gratitude has also revealed some surprising findings, in that students who practice gratitude increase their grade point averages. (Emmons & McCullough, 2003) rnBenefits of Gratitude Journalingrn * Improved physiological health (heart rhythms and sleep patterns) * Fewer physical symptoms (colds and headaches) * More likely to engage in physical activity * Increased cognitive functioning * Work performance and productivity * Higher states of focus, determination and energy * Increased sense of connectiveness to others (Emmons & McCullough, 2003) rnIn addition to these benefits, researchers have found that gratitude is actually contagious! In speaking to others using an “attitude of gratitude,” their emotional health improved also. Further, children who practiced grateful thinking had more positive attitudes toward school and their families. (Froh, Sefick, & Emmons, 2008) rnSo How Do I Write a Gratitude Letter? rnMost of us have heard about gratitude journals, gratitude lists, and unsent letters. Why not pen a letter to a friend you’ve never properly thanked? Not via email or text… but a genuine letter on stationery paper. A written gratitude letter has lasting value because it can be read and re-read; a handwritten letter says that you have taken extra, special time to show your appreciation in a meaningful, personal way. rnTips for Writing Your Gratitude Letter: * Use your nicest stationery, or pick out some special paper at your local stationers. I like to use paper stock that has some texture – the sheer weight of the paper says that this note is important. * Be specific about the kindness that person provided to you and why it was meaningful to you. Have you grown as a result? Were you able to pay the kindness forward? What kind of impact did your friend’s kindness have indirectly on others? Or, is this letter simply an acknowledgement of all the wonderful acts of kindness your friend has bestowed? * Include drawings, a special recipe, an article clipping, or perhaps a photo. This “gift-in-kind” helps place a deeper emphasis on your gratitude. * Take your time and use your best handwriting. Sister Mary Critical didn’t walk around with that ruler for nothing. Handwrite the mailing and return addresses. Use a pretty stamp. rnNow that you’ve completed your gratitude letter, take time to incorporate gratitude into your regular journal. Each day, write 3 to 5 things you are grateful for. Continue the practice for a few weeks and you’ll likely see improvements in your physical, mental and emotional health. Continue the gratitude journaling for a month and research shows that your happiness levels will go up, while boredom and other negative feelings will go down. (Ceccanese & Dickinson, 2010 University of Michigan) rnWe can choose to cultivate a grateful outlook. We can lower our threshold to perceive kindnesses and imbue everyday experiences with an emotional backdrop of gratefulness. In so doing, we allow the life-giving practice of gratitude to broaden our lives by enabling healing of the past, providing contentment in the present, and delivering hope for the future.