Personal or Private?

"The more I write about who I am, the more I share myself with others, the more present as who I am I become, more centered, more grounded" I told my friend yesterday. We talked about writing books about our own experience, writing of sensitive stuff, embarrassing stuff, private stuff.

I looked at my writing, at more than a hundred posts I wrote in last two years. I thought about the way I write, as honestly and as openly as I can, and I realized that every time I describe the deepest and truest thoughts and feelings I become more than that. Every time I write a story of who I am, as openly and honestly as I can, I become more that that story. Every time I become more present of who I am beyond the story, of who I am that is beyond all stories, that can not be contained in any story, of who I am as God.

I believe that life is a deeply personal experience. God is a deeply personal experience. Reality is a deeply personal experience. But it is not private. It is not separate, it is not hidden, it is not a secret.

The more public who I am becomes, the more public my experience of reality becomes, the more public the way I feel and relate becomes, the stronger is my presence, my presence as the God that I am. The more I share myself with the world the more present, more real I become.

Who I am is not the story of me. Who I am are not the stories I share in my blogs and yet I experience who I am more deeply when I share those stories because who I am is not a private, hidden experience. Who I am only exist in relationship.