A Gift in my Life

My friend Nel is a woman whom I can never forget. She is bright, funny and very excited about energy work—a part of my life that is very important to me. It really pleased me that she was in tune with my work and liked to share the healing energies. She practiced Reiki and was a certified hypnotherapist. The problem was, she would disappear periodically, even when we had made plans. I would feel that it was a personal rebuff and stop calling her. Eventually we were back on the phone, but I was getting tired of the cycle.

One evening, while talking with my friend Sudie, who teaches A Course in Miracles, she told me that this lady was a gift in my life. “She is there to teach you forgiveness,” she said.

“Yikes!” said I. “Another teacher? Can’t someone just be a friend? Why do people need to upset me so that I can learn something?”

Sudie told me, “Once you understand forgiveness, no one will need to teach it to you anymore.”
With a deep sigh, I agreed to go home and meditate on this subject. As I did, I realized that if, as I believe, love is too great a subject for humankind to grasp in totality, is not forgiveness an aspect of love, and therefore similarly profound? It was time for greater insights into forgiveness.

There comes a time and place where we need to simply believe that these ideals exist and are attainable for every one of us. I concluded with this thought: The opposite of forgiveness is resentment. Resentment is always linked to suffering.

With this firmly in mind, I was prepared to face my meeting the next evening with the disappearing woman. I was willing to practice forgiveness regardless of her behavior—so I wouldn’t need more lessons!

“What happened?” you ask. She asked me three times: “Can you forgive me?” In disbelief I returned the gift, “Yes,” I said. I did not know how. I was practicing forgiveness—now I would need to live it. I realized that I was WILLING to forgive and then released it to the Universe knowing that I would be shown how.

Look at the instant results! She and I are still close friends many years later. I have since learned the joy of applying the power of forgiveness to overcome hurt and resentment. What a huge difference in my life!!!

We are all part of a beautiful, unfolding Universe. Why not look into the face of another and see the beauty that exists within, instead of focusing on the masks of personality and appearances? We need to consider how much love and compassion we are willing to impart. Are we ready and willing to release and let go of the need to be a victim long enough to love and forgive others and ourselves?

Is anyone really unforgivable? In a case that seems too difficult to forgive,we can begin by being willing to forgive. Is not forgiveness the act of letting go of the past and allowing ourselves to be grateful in the present moment—free of bitterness? A bumper sticker read:

Forgiveness means giving up all hope of a better past.

You see, the past is gone but the bitterness is a choice. You are choosing whether or not to let your feelings about something someone said or did eat you up—perhaps literally.

There is a deeper meaning to forgiveness. It is seeing love in the face of hate, fear or resentment. It is replacing every ugly thought that comes up for us because it is truly the only healthy, satisfying thing to do. Anything less will harm us every day for the rest of our lives.

We can learn to let go with love. We can be grateful for, and forgiving of, these “gifts” in our lives without the need to indulge our teachers’ behaviors. We can remain in a loving space anywhere, anytime, and with anyone, as soon as we first learn to love and forgive ourselves! My ideals for you today are these: nn· We CAN rise above the hurt of the past into the forgiveness that will pave the way for a joyful tomorrow.nn· We just don’t need the kind of toxicity that is produced by resentment.nn· We can live the magic of forgiveness. It is truly one of the most powerful and mystical secrets of life!

How important is this?

You will either succeed or be forever miserable.