Recognizing Unhealthy Relationships

One of the keys to obtaining a better life or living arrangement is to assess the quality of relationships that you surround yourself with. Do you surround yourself with loving relationships or unhealthy relationships? For someone that has a pattern or history with unhealthy relationships, the difference between the two may be difficult to decipher.

Healthy relationships are relationships that add to our well being, not subtract. They bring out the best of us by being supportive of our goals and our inner selves. Unhealthy relationships often cause us stress and subtract from our well being, often leaving us feeling depleted of energy.

Relationships are opportunities to express these aspects of self. An opportunity is nothing more than a time and place to demonstrate that you are a kind person or a cruel person or whatever. All of life needs to express itself, and getting involved with another is that opportunity that you have drawn to yourself to say "here I am," "I am kind," "I am cruel," or anything else that you wish to express.

This is the purpose of the relative world. It is the forum, the time and place to experience what you believe that you are and to declare it.

Personal relationships with lovers, partners, family, relatives, friends and strangers facilitate expression of your being. Without relationships you would be nothing because you could not express yourself and you could not declare that you are one thing or the other.

As we change our inner definition or template of our male and female selves to a place of balance and self-acceptance, we are able to attract someone who is more reflective of our true counterpart. Even if we are balanced with our inner masculine reflection, if we do not like our own femininity, we would be unable to create a truly balanced relationship for ourselves.

When you acknowledge your love relationships are at the top of your values list and live accordingly, you will naturally do what you need to do to build and keep good relationships. Keeping their importance in mind as you live your relationships will provide a filter which will ensure you 'do the right thing' moment to moment. Good relationships are built over time with creative effort, care and attention. Many people make great efforts to get hitched and then let themselves go, becoming lazy and indifferent to their relationship. Couples in good relationships do the opposite. They constantly work to keep adding value to the relationship. Happy couples are thoughtful of each other. They invest time, energy and money in expressing their love and demonstrating their love in creative, fun ways that honor each other and make their relationship so good.

Follow your intuition. If something doesn’t feel right to you with a relationship then pay attention to those feelings. They are there for a reason. Some people can grow together inside their relationships and some may have to grow apart. The key is to look at ourselves and our relationships in their truest light.

Know that each one of us is entitled to have a loving relationship or friendship. We are worthy of receiving love just as we are worthy of giving it. True partnership fills our cups with abundance, joy, and solidarity, a gift that multiplies within our hearts and our families.