Article

Regain Your Emotional Balance in These Challenging Times!

Topic: Positive PsychologyFeaturing Lily MarsPublished April 17, 2009

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Even in the best of times, life can be challenging. Sometimes failing health or loss of a job may be at the root of our concerns. Other times it may be smaller things, such as feeling left out, being criticized or feeling judged by others that sends us for a loop. And that’s the focus of this piece.nnDisapproval may feel uncomfortable, but it can also be instructive and helpful. When someone reacts negatively to you, or doesn’t respond at all, it may actually be their issue and have nothing at all to do you.nnIf you receive a criticism that is valid, this is an excellent learning experience and opportunity for you. It offers the chance to see things you may not have been aware of before, from which you can learn. I’ve found that the most painful criticism is often self-inflicted and usually off base. Becoming more aware of these kinds of situations early on can help you nip them in the bud, so to speak. This allows you to stop the downward emotional spiral before it gets into full gear.nnThere is no shame in criticism that is directed at you by others, or even by yourself. Both present opportunities for awareness, insight and growth. Self-criticism presents a unique opportunity to forgive yourself, get over old programming and become more self-accepting and self-loving.nnJust because someone doesn’t acknowledge you in a positive way, or ignores you outright, or disapproves of you in some way, doesn’t mean you’re at fault, much less a failure. Other people’s biases are often reflected in their actions and judgments, and that is fine. Everyone is entitled to his or her point of view and belief. It doesn’t make it right or mean it’s an accurate assessment.nnEven a series of events where you are not acknowledged – involving different people – doesn’t equate to your being less good, less valuable, less lovable or less cherished. Think of the millions of things you’ve done well, beautifully in fact, or ‘above and beyond the call of duty.’ Do you uphold and value these positive examples of yourself anywhere as close to the few blips on your personal radar? Probably not. Isn’t it time to look at the true and accurate balance sheet that mirrors the beautiful person you are?nnYour worth is evident to yourself and others, but others can’t really judge your true value. Rather, they can only provide their opinion of you based on things you say or do – a small sampling of who you really are, as expressed by your outward behavior.nnRejection happens to everyone, to one degree or another. It doesn’t mean there will be a contagion of rejection flowing from a single disappointing experience. Try not to take it to heart. Accept the comments that come to you and see if you resonate with them. Then grow from each and every one of these learning experiences, reflecting on those that don’t fit or apply to you for what they are – opportunities to become more aware and learn from it.nnLack of acknowledgment can be uncomfortable and push your buttons, but this feeling can and will pass. Brush yourself off and move on – doing one of many simple yet effective wellness exercises that will help you raise your vibration and lighten your emotional load. Using any of a number of simple techniques can help you put things in perspective and get back to a place of emotional balance, smoothly and quickly.nnA good reminder is to not magnify other people so they become larger than life. Everyone has his or her own issues, biases and blind spots. And we know that nothing stays constant. Others will change, modify and even forget things, just like you. We’re all human. Welcome to planet Earth, and bask in the knowledge that you are beautiful, whole and perfect, just as you are!

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