Remember Only The Good
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REMEMBER ONLY THE GOOD
Each time we survive the loss of a love, any kind of love, life takes on new meaning. We hurt, we cry, we learn, we grow. We promise ourselves that the next time around, we will be smarter and wiser and we are. . . . . until the next time. n We meet someone new, someone we care about and then for some strange reason, all logic and reasoning seem to take flight and we become void of any sound reasoning. We seem to hear what we want to hear and disregard what we don’t want. We see our loved one through our own personal filter and they look wonderful. Life is good, we are in love. Finally, there is hope that this life of ours will actually work out. Finally.
And then, somewhere in the journey down the road with our beloved, there’s a bump, and a little further down there’s a dip and then an unexpected curve in the road. n As darkness descends on the relationship, the night air thickens with a foggy mist disguised as denial. Yes, just enough denial to hide what lies ahead for we don’t want to know what lies ahead if we think it would hurt us, so we look for the good. We tell ourselves, if we can just stay focused on the good, maybe the bad will go away.
The road, like the relationship, eventually comes to an end and it’s time to get out, its time to say goodbye. Goodbyes aren’t easy and can be quite painful, no matter which side you are on. Let’s face it, goodbyes are never easy, especially when it feels like it is forever.
Standing on the side of the road, in what seems to be the middle of nowhere, you hear the rumble of thunder from the ominous clouds above. Within moments, it begins to rain, and it’s timing is impeccable. Your heart feels the trembling of the storm within. Your tears and the raindrops become interchangeable. No one can tell you are in pain.
When will the sun come out again? Will our hearts heal? When will it stop hurting, we ask ourselves. Only time will tell. In the meantime, we forge the road ahead with courage and a healthy curiosity for what life will hand us next.
Every relationship will go through different seasons. True love has the capacity to endure the changes in the weather. It is the very changing of the seasons that we struggle with. We get stuck in the summer or winter of our love and forget that for everything there is a time, a season and a reason. n Stand in the truth of who you are, for it is there you will find your strength, it is there you will find your peace, and it is there you will find your way back Home.
We will all take this trip. We will love, we will be loved and we will at some point be hurt by love. The blessing comes from being grateful for the opportunity to have someone to love in the first place. And in that loving, we realize that giving someone our love is never an assurance that they will love us back. We learn to not expect love in return, and whether or not love grows in their heart, we are content knowing it grew in ours.
Article author
About the Author
Janice Hoffman is the author of the award-winning book, Relationship Rules. What makes Janice Hoffman unique? Since 1996 her mentor has bee
Dr. John Gray, author of the best-selling Mars Venus material. Working closely with Gray, Janice taught the first facilitated Mars Venus Workshop in 1997 and went on to train over 550 Mars Venus facilitators and counselors worldwide. She has developed workshop curriculum for the Mars Venus Institute and was a contributing author for MarsVenus.com. Singles and couples seek her expert advice as a Relationship Coach. She continues to be featured in numerous articles and is a popular guest on radio and TV. Janice Hoffman specializes in raising the awareness of our differences--while teaching communication skills necessary to maintain healthy and passionate relationships.
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