Setting a relaxing space for care-givers and the rest of us

Running here and there, picking up children from after school events, stopping at the grocery store, making beds, dressing and feeding a new born baby, making business appointments, doing bill paying, mowing the lawn… sounds exhausting? These are just a fraction of the daily activities you perform as a a busy adult and we don’t even realize the extent of what goes into our day. We all benefit by making time to relax, if you are also a caregiver of a loved one, be it a new born child, or an elderly parent or in-firmed loved one, you may require additional time for calm and relaxation. The every-day stress of providing care to a family member, friend or loved one diverts focus from your own needs. Care giving interrupts your normal routine, including sleep disruption that may eventually take a toll on your body. The many daily responsibilities of care giving, bring great rewards, yet the overwhelming demands can trigger frustration, depression and fatigue. Self-care is of the utmost importance and far from a selfish endeavor. If you become a shadow of your former self, how can you provide the quality care and nurturing to those you love? Therefore, caring for yourself is essential-not a luxury. Relaxation and the nature of care givingrnRelaxation is a state of inner calm and balance accompanied by a tension-fee body.rnFor many, it is the antithesis of stress. Due to the level of both physical and emotional stress inherent to care giving, many experience “caregiver burnout” Relaxing on a regular basis throughout the day prevents your wellbeing from decline. Ways to relaxrnMost caregivers understand how vital relaxation is to their personal health and how it contributes to their ability to function as a caregiver. Yet, many feel too inundated to figure out where, when and how to begin. Here are a few hints. Make the time. Setting time aside in your hectic day is essential, but can be the biggest challenge. Determine what time of day is primarily quiet and slow. Declare that time as “your” time. 15-20 minutes is optimal. Prioritize it and stick to that timeframe. During that time, nothing else, barring an emergency, is as important as you. Create a relaxing space. Pick a place that is already soothing, quiet and pleasing to the eyes. If such a place does not exist, create a small a haven of peace, rest and reflection in a corner of your home. Your “peaceful space” might include a comfy chair, a scented candle, a fresh vase of flowers and a piece of beautiful music. You will look forward to returning to your personal retreat space each day. Breathing and meditation. According to the experts, deep breathing is one of the best ways to induce a relaxation response. Essentially, focusing on deep centered breathing is a form of meditation. Because it invokes a peaceful awareness, quiets the mind and relaxes the body, almost any breathing technique is valuable. For example, simply concentrate on your breathing and feel its natural rhythm without trying to alter it. After a few moments, deepen and elongate your breathe, breathe deep, allow your chest and abdomen to rise and fall. With each exhale allow tension, stress and worry to dissolve. Walk and spending time in nature. Walking is a natural stress reliever. It relaxes, reenergizes and refocuses the mind. Make walking for pleasure a regular part of your day. Walking also gives you the opportunity to experience nature. The peaceful sights and sounds of nature are a panacea for mind, body and soul. A relaxing attitude. Above all else, your mindset is vital. Approach relaxation with a positive and sincere attitude. Without the conscious intent to relax, even these suggestions can feel like additional tasks. Give yourself permission to let go of care giving responsibilities for just a short while. This enhances your ability to relax and thereby return to care giving with a renewed sense of purpose. The results of a new point of view rnAfter finding time to relax, you may notice that life comes back into perspective. Situations you viewed as difficult, overwhelming, and irresolvable, fall back into their true and right proportions. As you discover ways to relax you may adopt an attitude that will empower and enrich yourself and those around you. When you care for yourself, you provide better care for others. Relaxing is truly a way of emotionally and spiritually nurturing yourself. Over time you may find your entire lifestyle and personality undergoing subtle changes. Confidence returns, your ability to cope is strengthened and joy reemerges.