Simple Steps for Becoming Authentic
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There are many different levels to our being and the key to deep happiness and success is to live from the level of your authentic self. This means that you use everyday occurrences in your life to become more and more connected and aligned with your authenticity. There are a number of different areas where you can observe how synchronised or misaligned you are with your authentic self. Any misalignment shows most clearly at the level of your actions, however, the cause is most likely to be found at the level of how you see and interpret the world. We could summarise it into the following 3 levels:
1.Your thoughts and beliefs, which can be called your map of the world. Each of us sees the world differently. Although usually we think that what we see is the way that it is, it is really just a reflection of your “map”. Whilst you are aware of many of your thoughts and beliefs, large parts of your map of the world are obscured from you and stored in your unconscious mind, to you it appears to be, it is just the way the world is. Until you have experienced it in a different way you are unaware that other possibilities exist. In fact, each time you take a certain action or speak in a certain way, it reinforces the neural pathways involved. Then interestingly, your mind in most cases automatically skips along the most developed neural pathways.
2.Your feelings and emotional reactions. We tend to react positively or negatively to many situations and this disconnects you from your authentic self. The more neutral you can learn how to be, no matter the situation, the finer is your ability to maintain this connection and the more choice you have.
3.Your actions and words – both past and present. Whether we like it or not, we are influenced by our past. If nothing else, we are creatures of habit, so the actions that you take, create habits which mean that you will most likely repeat the same type of action in the future.
How to Synchronise with Your Authentic Selfr
If we expand on these 3 levels, we exist within a Habit Circle that is driven by our core beliefs. The good news is that when we observe unhelpful patters in our life, we can choose to break this circle at any point.
So what you believe or your map of the world creates your thoughts. What you think generates feelings and emotions. Your thoughts, feelings and emotions direct your actions. Your actions receive a response from the world that reaffirms your original belief. Then perhaps most importantly after going round this circle, just a few times, you have created a habit. After all, a habit is simply a pattern of thoughts, emotions and actions that you do on automatic pilot.
Our beliefs whilst unique and vastly varied fall into 1 of 2 groups:
Group 1
It´s not possible, it can´t be…, I can´t, the problem is…, they/he/she has… done/said…
This group of beliefs leads to disempowered thoughts, feelings and emotions (including depression, apathy, looking for blame, guilt, fear, frustration and anger). They create thoughts, feelings and emotions that rarely lead to actions that positively influence your situation and end up confirming the original belief. So people with a core belief system in this group find themselves in a downward spiral of disempowerment.
Group 2
What is possible, what can I/we do, what outcome would I/we like, how can I/we…
This group leads to empowered thoughts, feelings and emotions (including motivation, excitement, hope, energy, determination, collaboration and creativity) which in their turn create actions which positively influence the situation. Once again these people confirm their core belief of possibility finding themselves in an upward spiral of empowerment.
In conclusion then, a significant part of our work in realising ourself and our dreams is to synchronise our beliefs and therefore our thoughts, emotions, actions and words with the deepest sense of our authentic self. This is an exciting thought as it means that you are not only the source of your happiness, but of your success and empowerment. It can also be difficult for some people to accept as it also means that you are responsible for your life. There is no one to blame and it leaves no room for excuses, as it continually focuses you back on to what you can take action on to improve your life.
Article author
About the Author
SadaNam Kaur is an expert in professional & personal mastery, social & emotional intelligence. A pioneering coach & profesional development consultant, through integrative and accelerated learning.
She has worked in personal development and coaching for over 20 years and has supported thousands of people to take the next step in their lives, through courses and 1:1 coaching.
She was one of the first people to develop coaching in the U.K. http://howtomasteryourlife.com
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