Stories of the Grieving Process After a Child Dies - “Road Construction Next ___ Kilometers”

“HeartSpun Talk from the Crucible of Experience”©

From the life of Ken Matthies - Author, Poet, Real Life Storytellerr
You’ve probably seen this sort of example a thousand times before in your life and never had cause to think twice about it on any of those occasions.

Returning home one day from a visit to a nearby community I passed through a section of road being rebuilt and widened. The signs in advance of this area from either direction warn you of it saying “Road Construction Next ___ Kilometers”, with the empty blank of the number of kilometers to be traveled filled in by hand with a black felt marker pen.

It struck me how well these signs equate to the individual journey of grief itself.
In a way of speaking it could be said that everyone experiencing the grief of a loved one’s loss is suddenly thrown into a “construction zone” on their personal road of life – with everything about their formerly clear life highway ripped up, torn to pieces and seriously in need of reconstruction before the way ahead can ever again resemble smooth.

Suddenly you’re faced with ‘putting up the signs’ for this personal reconstruction zone of your life, and attempting to figure out what number to write in the blank space for the distance to be traveled through it. It seems at first to be an impossible task to comprehend a number to write down there – would one million miles be enough to start, you wonder? It certainly seems it’ll take that long is what your battered feelings tell you.

While seeming an impossible choice initially, the simple truth of this example is that the number you write down will change dramatically over time based upon your previous experiences of coping with crisis, and your own need and desire to understand and come to terms with the reality of its effects upon your life.

It’s for certain that the new road constructed will forever serve as a reminder of the loss, grief and bereavement you endured, and of the distance traveled to experience the healing of its journey.

Know that a day will come when you’ll gladly greet the sign which says “Construction Ends – Resume Speed”.

It’s a sign that speaks of your genuine healing.