Surviving Your Divorce when the Courts are New to Emotional Abuse! (by: Dr. Anne Brown RNCS)
Legacy signals
Legacy popularity: 1,484 legacy views
Legacy rating: 5/5 from 1 archived votes
Prepare to Fight
When one person only wants to control and sabotage during the divorce, mediation is usually not an option and a waste of money. I have seen victims of emotional abuse in their marriage be victims of mediation because they are the only person bringing adult behavior to the mediation table. Mediation requires two people who want to come to an agreement. If you have identified yourself as the victim of emotional abuse in your marriage, I recommend you prepare for an adversarial divorce. Hopefully your lawyer, with experience in these situations, will be able to recognize the signs of a hostile “ex” and prepare to fight for you. Sit down with yourself first and then your lawyer to decide what is important to you and then strategize on how to get it. Your “ex” will know you well and know what is important to you and work to make sure you don’t get it. Hopefully, you will have jou
aled the abuse, kept the abusive texts and emails, and documented any attempts to counter the abuse. E.G “I will not continue this discussion until you stop yelling”. Obviously, you cannot counter if you feel you will be physically abused. Jou
als are very important during divorce particularly when the other party hasn’t jou
aled. Your “ex” will also disobey agreements requiring you to either let the issue go or use money to require the courts to enforce the agreement. The goal of the emotionally abusive partner is to keep you engaged, keep you from moving on, and to control the situation. Do not count on the courts to make your “ex” behave. Pick your battles and fight hard for what is important to you. Work to get everything hashed out and spelled out specifically financially, medically, parenting, holidays etc. Do not leave anything unaddressed or for a later date to revisit. Do not expect you can negotiate any divorce issues with your “ex” on your own. And don’t expect he/she will follow the agreement the way you will.
Continue reading here: https://www.divorceforce.com/article/surviving-your-divorce-when-the-courts-are-new-to-emotional-abuse-by-dr-anne-brown-cs
Article author
About the Author
Dr. Anne Brown PhD,
of Sausalito, Califo
ia, is a psychotherapist, speaker, coach, and the author of Backbone Power: The Science of Saying No. Anne’s approach is especially applicable to people affected by divorce. Backbone Power is a no nonsense self help guide to making decisions while having backbone and integrity in all your choices, short term and long term. In addition to helping the divorce community, Anne has over twenty years experience as the trusted advocate and advisor to influential corporate leaders, trial atto
eys, athletes, leaders, physicians and others seeking actionable guidance. Brown is a graduate of the University of Virginia, BS in Nursing; Boston University, MS in Psychiatric-Mental Health in Nursing; and International University, PhD in Addiction Studies. In 1997 Brown also reached a personal goal of obtaining her Black Belt in Soo Bahk Do. You can contact Dr. Anne Brown through her website: www.BackbonePower.com .
Further reading
Further Reading
Article
Finding Lasting Emotional Balance With Expert Relationship Psychology and Couples Therapy in New York
Life in New York City is filled with ambition, intensity, and constant movement, which can place unique strains on personal relationships. Whether facing communication breakdowns, emotional distance, or unresolved conflicts, working with an experienced Relationship Psychologist NYC can provide the clarity and guidance needed to move forward with confidence. Therapists Of NY is widely recognized as a trusted provider of relationship-focused mental health support, offering tail
December 18, 2025
Article
The Role of Modern Psychiatry in Supporting Children and Families
In todayâs fast-paced world, mental health has become just as important as physical health. Families often find themselves facing new challenges, from academic pressure to social changes, and children are particularly vulnerable. For many families, reaching out to a psychiatrist for children is the first crucial step in addressing emotional, behavioral, or developmental concerns. Child psychiatrists specialize in diagnosing and treating mental health issues in young people,
August 21, 2025
Article
AI and Faith: Can Technology Bridge the Gap with God?
We live in a day and age where technology has entered all facets of life. From online shopping to online classes and even the manner in which we communicate with one another, technology has enabled all that. Can technology, and more notably, artificial intelligence (AI), bring us nearer to God, though? AI platforms that include thebiblechat.com are already making Bible study more personal and convenient. Let’s talk about the process and whether it could be helpful to yo
March 20, 2025
Article
What to Expect at an Insomnia Treatment Clinic near New Mexico
If you are struggling with insomnia in New Mexico, seeking help from an insomnia treatment clinic could be the key to getting a good night's sleep. These clinics specialize in diagnosing and treating sleep disorders, including insomnia. When you arrive at the clinic, you can expect to undergo a thorough evaluation to determine the underlying cause of your insomnia. This may involve completing a sleep diary, undergoing a physical exam, and even participating in a sleep study t
August 1, 2024