The Courting Phase of a Narcissistic Relationship

A narcissistic personality is skilled at reading people, and focuses laser like narcissistic behaviour to secure a new desired source of supply. The narcissistic personalityvery quickly sums up what you like, how he or she needs to act to win you over, and how to create an intense connection - which will feel like finally your soul mate has been delivered into your life. It is common for people to report that it seemed the narcissistic individual shared all the same interests, had all the samegoals and dreams and seemed to betheperfect partner this person had always dreamed about. The narcissistic behaviour has an agenda to it. It is to gain your confidence and allow the narcissisticindividualto infiltrate deeply into your mental, emotional, psychic and physical space so that the they can engulf and enmesh with you. This sets up a dependency whereby the narcissisticindividual can ensure narcissistic supply from you – and you will be trapped in the perfect ideal of your perfect partner and will not want to disengage when the mask slips and the cracks start to appear. It is incredibly important to understand that if you meet a person whilst courting who seems ‘too good to be true’ that there is every change that this person is a narcissistic personality. Healthy andmature adults do not immediately start committing to an individual with undying gestures of love, compliments, assistance and gifts with an individual they don’t even know yet. The reason a narcissistic personality does this is because he or she feels empty, lifeless and has an incredible need - like a heroin addict sourcing his drug - to get the fix of narcissistic supply. If you are dating and meet someone who you feel an intense and instant connection with pay attention to how this feels. Does is feel calm and soothing, or does it feel anxious and ‘electric’? Take your time to get to know a new potential partner, don’t rush, and if someone is attempting to grant you masses of compliments, energy, time, assistance and gifts be very very wary. Set boundaries and tellthis person to not move so fast. If you are dealing with a narcissistic personality you will see point blank narcissistic behaviour. This will manifest as not listening to you, not respecting your desire to slow down, and continuing to ‘love bomb’ you to create his or her agenda. If this happens, get away and don’t ever look back, because the offer of love he or she is presenting you is not love – and will only end up being soul-chattering abuse. Real and healthy love just does not begin this way.