Article

The Effects of Low Self Esteem

Topic: Positive PsychologyPublished February 14, 2011

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I recently (in 2010), got back in contact with an individual, who was literally my heart and soul. You know, one of those people you thought you loved unconditionally, until things started to reveal itself. The late musicia
Rick James used to say, “Cocaine is a hell of a drug.”

Cocaine, my dear people, is not ANYBODY’S friend. The fact that it is widely available across the globe, really destroys lives, and relationships. However, the effects of cocaine (having seen someone come off of it in front of me), is heartbreaking. The paranoia, the passive aggressive behavior, the lies, the scratching, the miscommunication, lack of concentration, the selfishness, the disconnection from “reality,” the symptoms are plenty and unpredictable. The problem with cocaine, when people seem to take it, it gives a false sense of high self esteem and sends them into a trance, a type of Euphoria.

I just watched an interview with a reformed drug addict and now Gospel musician, Wess Morgan, and one thing he said that made me understand low self esteem is that, “I didn’t like drugs, I loved drugs. I loved getting high.” Wess, at the time of being in trouble with the law, disappearing for weeks at an end, felt powerless over his own life. But one day, he just changed for the better. As the late great Rick James used to say, “it’s a hell of a drug.”

It has been an extremely long time since I heard anyone mention that drug until recently. I can say, I was very disappointed in the individual that told me, it was something they took. However, things started to make sense, low self esteem is not something anyone of us can run away from, but putting our issues to one side and hoping some type of drug will help us forget, we really are living in a parallel universe.

Amy Winehouse, I would love to give this young lady a hug. I watched her perform last night in Dubai, and her disorientated state of behavior was riddled by an addiction which, I pray, she is overcoming. To many it was shocking, and the crowd booed, but to me it was a cry for help and her management team are something to be desired. She forgot the lyrics of her songs, her eyes were flickering right to left, she kept disappearing off stage, until one of her backing singers performed at least three songs to entertain the crowd. When she sang, she constantly played with her hair, she was continuously scratching her arms, she was so far away from the microphone, no one could even understand or hear what she was singing, she looked at the floor most of the time, she played with her fingers and looked at them simultaneously. Strangely I thought the concert was really good, the band were amazing, all I wanted to do was give her a hug. She will be alright, but when someone is down, don’t kick them further, love them.

One new friend I made while watching Amy, was François, he was so positive, he kept shouting, “Come on Amy, you can do it.” I loved him for that. We clapped and we cheered her on. My friend, whom I went to the concert with, said you have a great sense of compassion, and maybe I do, when someone is trying so hard to do right, even when they are in a bad place, we can only support them.

One thing about low self esteem, is that sometimes, we don’t know we have it, and we think by substituting our in built happiness stream with something else, will change our outlook, but really it doesn’t, it puts the negatives things on hold until we are ready to deal with them head on.

Low self esteem, and a substance such as cocaine, re-deflect what is wrong in your life on so many levels. However, one thing that helps you get better in life is to admit that low self esteem exists in some part of your life, because believe me, we all suffer from it from one point in our lives or another, and you know what, there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of, that’s if you are not a human……..then disappear back to planet Mars!

Where do we all, ideally, want to be? I believe have a healthy sense of self esteem which can be understood as “Healthy self-esteem lies between these two extremes. It means you have a balanced, accurate view of yourself. For instance, you have a good opinion of your abilities but recognize your flaws. When you understand your own worth, you invite the respect of others.” - http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/self-esteem/MH00128

Son as we continue our life journey to strengthen our health mentally, physically, and spiritually, if someone is having a bad time in their lives, don’t continue to ignore them, or kick them further, show them some love, and if you can’t do that, then leave them be. Low self esteem can verge on the serious side of life, and if this world is going to get better and war is going to end, as of poverty, we have to start loving ourselves and those around us unconditionally (me included).

As Valentine’s is around the corner, and you haven’t done anything special for someone you love, going through a hard time, and may be suffering from low self esteem, do something nice. And NO….they don’t have to be your girlfriend or boyfriend, Valentines is simply about love!!

Quote of the day - There is such incredible irony in finding out who people are when you know where you are going. - Adrienne A. Wallace – GET HEALTHY PEOPLE!!

Much Love, S.

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