The First Step to Surviving Infidelity

It's quite common for couples to draw a distinct "line in the sand" when it comes to infidelity. This means that once infidelity occurs, there's no going back. The relationship is destined to immediately end and no mistakes are forgiven. The victim of the infidelity is destined to remain forever traumatized and every ounce of love, devotion and trust is gone in a heartbeat.

We all know that infidelity is basically an unfaithful act that is performed by a spouse or partner. The common thread in stories involving infidelity is the extreme pain and sense of betrayal felt by the innocent partner. There is also the collateral damage that can be felt by others, such as children, friends and family members. In other words, things can become amazingly negative in a short period of time. So the question remains, is it possible to survive this horrendous experience? If so, then how?

The first thing to understand is what a person is facing when confronted with infidelity. This may sound a bit obvious but, in actuality, it's not since there are several types of infidelity. For example:

There is an "opportunist" level of infidelity that may have nothing to do with the love and devotion of a spouse or partner. Simply put, when an opportunity comes along to have a sexual relation with an attractive individual, the opportunity is taken, pure and simple. This is the most difficult type of infidelity to survive, since it often speaks to the character of the person committing the infidelity. This can even be related, in some cases, to patterns of behavior that were observed in childhood home life.

Another form of infidelity can occur when a partner has been repeatedly denied sexual access to the other. This type of scenario can actually lead to infidelity that is born out of rejection and frustration that may have nothing to do with the love or attraction to the partner.

The infidelity that occurs out of the need for a romantic relationship is yet another form. This can happen when a partner has fallen out of love with the other and feels the need to fill that void with a romantic encounter.

There is also infidelity that can be formed out of a conflict of interest. This one is very hard to detect, since there will still be a strong relationship, both emotionally and sexually with the spouse or partner. However, a third party has been introduced, outside of the relationship. In this scenario, there is a strong romantic connection between two separate individuals that conflict with the original relationship.

Finally, we have a form of infidelity that occurs when one partner has completely fallen out of love for the other. However, for whatever reason, they are committed to staying with that partner and don't consider leaving.

When one can understand the types of infidelity that can occur, then a better assessment of the possibility of a relationship surviving the infidelity is possible.