The Inner Mate: Key to Loving Relationships

Perhaps you are single and looking for a love relationship. You might be married and looking for a way to make your relationship work more smoothly for you. Or you might be enduring the heartache of a painful separation. If any of these situations sounds like yours, your Inner Mate could provide the love, security and wisdom you need to solve your relationship problem.

What is the Inner Mate and how does he/she work for you?

Inside the subconscious mind of every one of us is an image of the ideal love that we seek. This idealized image is usually the source of intense desire, expectation, and excitement as we project it onto another person with whom we fall in love. We imagine that this person is our "ideal mate"...until the lessons of experience show us, to our profound disappointment, that this other person does not meet all the needs we have for companionship, creative inspiration, and romantic love. Then we may go off in search of another "Perfect" Stranger, or we may choose to live with the necessary compromises of commitment while suppressing our secret longing for a deeper fulfillment.

Now, with Alchemical Hypnotherapy, there is an alternative. As an Alchemist, you can learn that instead of projecting this rich resource of love and bliss onto the body of some external partner, you can experience your "Inner Mate" as a warm, loving and sensual person in your life, a daily source of nurturing, romantic love and as a guide in helping you to build and sustain love relationships in the outer world.

The Inner Mate has three essential roles for the Alchemist. First, my inner mate heals my heart of the wounds of abandonment, loneliness, and grief so that I can feel emotionally secure and can draw romance into my life. As a lonely teenager, it didn't take me long to figure out that desperation is not an aphrodisiac. In fact, the more I've needed love, the harder it was to find! I was on my way to becoming another adolescent statistic when my inner mate showed up. I discovered in my inner mate a kind of "safety net" of security who helped support me and reassure me during my lonely times, thus allowing me to draw love into my life. When I was rejected, she whispered in my ear, "Don't worry sweetheart. She has poor taste. That's her problem!" Thus she gave me the courage to continue to move out and take risks in finding love and the security necessary to draw that love to me.

Secondly, my inner mate is my guide to achieving intimacy, compassion, and commitment in relationships. My inner mate is a women so she can advise me on how to relate to women. ("Quigs, it's time to bring flowers!") She interprets for me the infinite mysteries of feminine behavior, and lets me know when to approach and when to back off. She tells me when it's appropriate for a deeper commitment and helps to accomplish it. And by giving me constant romantic fulfillment, she prevents me from laying at my partner's feet the list of excessive demands that has in the past destroyed my intimate relationships. Just as important, she has the wisdom to see when my needs aren't going to be met, and it's time to look for someone else. (Advice my inner co-dependent romantic sometimes needs!) She gives me a model of fulfilling love against which I can judge the appropriateness of all my love relationships.

Currently my inner mate is helping me stay close and committed within a very satisfying relationship, without losing my boundaries, or my personal identity, and it feels great!

Finally, the inner mate is the key to inspiration, creativity, and the ecstasy of enlightenment. This is not esoteric metaphysics; just listen to any popular song, "You are my soul and my heart's inspiratio
", "I've got sunshine on a cloudy day", etc., etc. Remember for a moment the glorious excitement of being in love with a new partner in the innocent days when we still believed in romance. Do you remember that even the sky had a new color, even the birds had a new song?

Well, we discovered that no external partner could ever be counted upon to give us that creative joy, so we gave up that crazy excitement. But what if we could have that joy of being loved every day? That quiet, tearful ecstasy of knowing that I am completely and totally loved by the sweetest woman in creation is a feeling I can call upon and enjoy every day of my life. That, to me, is the greatest gift of my inner mate.