The Memory Box

When the kid’s mom passed away I had so many emotions rushing through me. Anger, anxiety, fear, concern and sorrow were just a few to mention. I was not at all prepared for her passing. My only concern at the time was what the hell do we do now? I believed that I was mentally prepared for raising my kids as a single parent, but totally naïve as to what that meant. I had so much coming at me that I was honestly in a fog for quite some time. I never ever sat down and thought about how this was going to affect me. My only concern was for Jack and Michaela. How were they going to handle the loss of a mother? Do they need counseling? Was I going to do the right things at the right time or was I just going to make things more confusing for them. Well here we sit 2 ½ years later and for the most part I think that we have weathered the storm alright. I know that they will have some skeletons in their past, but I can only do what I believe is best for them and then pray that they are ok in life. I can never replace what they have lost, but what I can do is never let them forget how much their mother loved them and the good memories that still exist today. Two years ago I decided that the best way to do this was to create a memory box for each of them. A special box that had a picture of them with their mother embossed on the top and filled with reminders of their mom inside. Pictures of them together, school drawings that they did for her, jewelry that their mom had , stuffed animals that she gave them and the list goes on and on. I was so excited to do this but as time went on I found myself putting it off week after week. They say that as time goes on the memories of loved ones begins to fade. I do not want this to happen to my kids. I am mad at myself for waiting so long to make this a reality. But I am also one who believes that you can not dwell on the mistakes of your past only learn from them. With that said, I have made it my number one goal this Christmas to present them with their memory boxes. I hope that they will cherish their box with the intention that it was created by. That being love and a life time of great memories with the mother who gave them life. I can not change the past but hopefully I will be able to make their future one filled with wonderful memories of their mom. I hope that this post helps to remind each of you how important memories are today regardless of what got you to where you are todayrn