The Purpose of Illness

Many years ago, I worked with a woman who had cancer throughout her entire body and was preparing to die. She told me how she had been fighting the disease for years, had done every treatment, and now she was at the end. I listened to her story carefully and when she was done, I asked her one simple question. I asked if she could think of any small way that the cancer had changed her life in a good way. She looked at me in disbelief but then in earnestness, took several moments to think about it.
Finally, she responded, “Well, I’m on disability.” I marveled at her honesty, and proceeded to tell her that in actuality, she did not have a health issue at all, she had a prosperity issue.

We then prayed together, and in the prayer I never mentioned her body or the cancer at all. I simply prayed for her to know more prosperity in her life. She returned two weeks later to tell me that she was cancer free, and that her Doctors did not know why. But, she did.

She’s alive today, not because of me, but because she was willing to be radically honest with herself. The Truth will indeed set you free.

Illness always serves a purpose. Sometimes, it’s a wake up call; a sign that it’s time to pay attention to ourselves on another level, one we have most likely been avoiding.

Illness can serve us in many ways. It can be as simple as helping us to get out of work. Sometimes, we just need time off, but for whatever reason, we can’t seem to give ourselves permission to take it, so we get sick and then are forced to. This is much more socially acceptable in our minds than asking for a mental health day, or telling the boss that we’re tired and need to rest.

Other times, like with my client, illness can be meeting a deep unconscious need. When you really think about it, being sick gets us off the hook from a lot of things, like responsibility, expectations, or having to step into our greatness. It also gets us things like attention, love, compassion, understanding, forgiveness, patience, support, money, companionship, and caretaking, to name a few.

There are actually a zillion ways an illness can serve us, but no one ever wants to admit it, because it seems wrong to want these things, in the first place. The truth is, we have every right to want these things and to have them. But, we justify why we can’t just ask for what we want, “I can’t take time off right now, I’m too busy at work. I’ll look selfish, or like I’m not a team player.”

In the case of my client, she was more afraid of being homeless than of being sick. She was tired of taking care of herself and struggling. Disability paid for her to live without having to work anymore. I know it seems radical, but these are deep unconscious needs we are talking about. No one would make the decision consciously to get sick with cancer just to get out of having to work. It’s what our sub-conscious does, to meet an unmet need.

If you are willing to be honest enough with yourself and identify what need in you is being met by the illness, then you will have the opportunity to meet that need in another way. If you can say for instance, “I feel very alone and need my family around me”. Then you can ask for that and know you deserve to have it, without creating an illness to meet that need.

Obviously, to prevent illness, we must be awake to our needs, be willing to give ourselves what we need, when we need it, and know that we are deserving of that.

Illness is not a random act. It holds a purpose. Find that purpose, meet it head on, and you will be on your way to health once again.

To the Truth That Sets Us All Free,

Donna Gershman ALSP