Article

The Secret to What Women Really Want

Topic: Relationship AdviceBy Bonnie FehlauerPublished Recently added

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What Women Want was a comedic film released in the year 2000. The film’s main character which is played by Mel Gibson, wakes up one morning with the ability to read women’s minds. With the significant role women play in our society, if it were possible for a man to read a woman’s mind, he could control the world! Even though I’m not a mind reader, after 30 years of marriage here are a few things I have discovered that women want. 1. What women want is to communicate beyond the headlines – Barbara Grizzuti Harrison says, “Women's propensity to share confidences is universal. We confirm our reality by sharing.” A man sees communication as a vehicle to analyze a situation, so focusing on the headlines makes perfect sense to him. On the other hand, women see communication as a vehicle used to take the emotional temperature of the relationship. A women's sense of security is defined by the quality of her relationships. The healthier she’s convinced her relationships are, the stronger she feels. As a result, when a man is silent, it's easy for a woman to imagine the worst. Make an effort to communicate beyond the headlines even when it feels awkward or unpleasant. 2. What women want is to feel safe - There are three primary areas of protection that make a woman feel safe; physical, emotional and spiritual. A good guard dog can provide the first one; it’s only a good man that can provide the remaining two. Spiritual The best way to protect her spiritually is to make sure you are maintaining your own spiritual health. The more at peace you are with your world, the more secure she feels in your world. In addition, the stronger your relationship with God, the more effectively you are able to love her unconditionally. Emotional One way to protect your partner emotionally is to resist angry outbursts and to avoid speaking unkind or hurtful words. Unhealthy expression of anger create insecurity in a relationship. Uncontrolled anger is a form of control an intimidation. Intimidation always weakens trust in a relationship. Also, as you are launching out to conquer your world keep in mind she is trying to figure where she fits in. Assure her you are aware of her apprehensions and that your desire is to do everything you can to reduce the risks in your lives and that you want her help and input in the process. 3. What women want is to be cherished – Simple expressions of affection consistently done over time help make a woman feel cherished and valued. Acts of service such as offering to help with her daily tasks (doing the dishes, taking the kids to school), communicate to her that she is valued. These efforts speak louder to her than your income or the success you achieve in her career. Conclusion There is a verse in the Bible that has served as a great reminder to me regarding how I am to relate to my wife, Bonnie. 1Peter 3:7 says,” The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God's grace, you're equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don't run aground.”

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About the Author

Michael and Bonnie Fehlauer have been married to Bonnie over 30 years. They have experienced both the height of success and the devastation of failure. As a result, Michael Fehlauer and Bonnie Fehlauer have a strong desire to see the same healing they have experienced happen in the lives of others. Michael Fehlauer and Bonnie Fehlauer have traveled extensively throughout the world holding marriage and family conferences.
Their focus is to bring hope to hurting people by offering solid solutions to the mindsets that result in self-destructive behaviors which chip away at the very foundation of our relationships.

http://www.relationship-builder.com/
http://www.relationship-builder.com/understanding-the-differences-between-men-and-women/

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