Smart Talk

How do you get from where you are now -- from here, this present moment -- to there, where you want to go? What is the process? I see five steps.

First, you've got to figure out the "there." The there may be a new marriage, a new family, business expansion, a new home, increased income, or improve health.

I encourage you to think in ideals. Think in ideals even when all about you insanity and denial. An ideal is an image, vision, fantasy, dream, or aspiration that exists only in the mind. You simply look at current reality, the way things are now, and then you say to yourself, "What would be ideal?"

Creating an ideal, goal, or vision is just making construct use of your imagination. You construct a future in your mind before it ever occurs.

Also, make sure your reasons (motives) are right. Why do you want it? What drives you? You don't need to compete with other people. You don't have to be the best in your profession. You set your own ideals. What matters is making the world around you a better place by creating happiness-producing events for yourself and other people. You make it happen simply because it's the right thing to do.

Engage in constructive self-talk. Constructive self-talk is what I call smart talk. Self-talk is the continual dialogue you have with yourself. It is also the raw material from which you manufacture your own self-image. Your subconscious believes what you tell yourself and then makes sure you act according to your beliefs. Language has power over behavior. If you control your self-talk, you can use your subconscious to help you achieve your goals. You move toward, and become like, that which you think about. Your present thoughts determine your future. What you repeatedly tell yourself with your own self-talk determines your beliefs and self-image, which affects your behavior. Unless you change your stored beliefs by changing your self-talk, you won't alter your behavior. Your future will look a lot like your past.

Your process will accelerate when you reflect upon your success. We pass too lightly upon our successes. We tend to say, "Oh, it was nothing" or "I was just lucky." And by saying that, we convince ourselves that we had little to do with it.

To reinforce your success, list 10 of your most prominent achievements and reflect on this list for a moment each day. By doing this, you greatly enhance your ability to replicate your past success.

Use your creative imagination to set and imprint goals. One way to use your forethought -- your ability to think ahead -- is to set goals. Goal setting is a deliberate attempt to define the quality standards that will guide you into the future.

Goal setting is changing where you belong in your mind. It's expanding the environment, developing new standards, and releasing your inhibitive, restrictive behavior.

When you set a goal you declare that some things are more significant than others. Until you define what's important to you , resources and information that would help you achieve your goal could be right in front of you, but you won't see them. You'll block them out. Goal setting allows essential information to get through.

Don't limit your aspirations and dreams based upon the resources available to you now. More resources maybe all around you, without your knowing it. As soon as you declare them significant, suddenly they appear.

Start taking action, and use feedback to correct course. Don't wait for the big time -- the big time is where you are at the moment. You take action on the level you're living presently. Or you may never take action.

Just start where you are. Don't wait until you're good and ready before you take action. Take action now and get better as you go. Remember to seek feedback and make adjustments. You are teleological in nature. A teleological mechanism can change directions after it's released. It doesn't care where it starts; it only cares where it is now in relation to where it intends to be. As you expand where you belong, you allow yourself to move in the direction without negative feedback causing you to go back to "where you belong."

Create a team of people around you. These are people who, in their won way, can do whatever they need to do to build that community or that environment toward that ideal. Recognized that one person can't do it alone. Seek the company of soul mates who have similar ideals. As you create a team of such people around you, including your immediate family, you then experience the power of synergy. Your work will begin to have greater significance and influence.

Finally, learn how to pass the baton to others -- to your family, to your children, to the people around you. Learn how to be a mentor, a coach, a teacher, a leader. And allow yourself to be admired by people around you. If they ask, "How can I be like you?" tell them, "This is how." Help them to experience the same joy. Remember, however, that you are not the model -- only one good model. Allow people to run the race their way. Five Master Qualities

Extraordinary leaders have five qualities in common:

Teachability.
They are open to new ideas and methods, new ways of doing things. They listen, observe and learn constantly.
Adaptability.
They adjust to constant change.
Flexibility.
They work more fluidly with people, dealing with people of different talents, temperatures, and styles.
Creativity.
They try it, fix it, and do it -- and encourage others to do the same.
Sensitivity.
They have a keen awareness of the needs, interests and conce
s of other people.

You can develop such extraordinary qualities if you're willing to learn and apply what you learn. nnnn