Tools of the Mind - Learning to Work With Your Many Selves

Each one of us has within us many different voices, or selves or what are sometimes referred to as sub-personalities.

What we are talking about here are the many different aspects of our "self" that go to make up the whole thing that we conventionally refer to as "me."

From now on, I am going to refer to these aspects as "selves."

Most of these selves are invisible or unconscious to us at any one time and they are often in disagreement or conflict with each other.

When denied a voice or direct conscious expression they seek expression in unconscious ways - out of our awareness - and frequently in ways that are negative, resistant, unresourceful and sometimes downright destructive.

These negative hidden selves are often referred to as our "shadow" side.

The world of therapy devotes an enormous amount of time and clients' money to attempting to get in touch with these hidden parts of us, and to bringing them into conscious awareness and giving them a voice. There are many different therapeutic approaches that attempt to help people to achieve this.

I am not a therapist nor am I a counsellor nor am I qualified in any way to offer advice on what I am about to share with you. So please take this in that spirit. If what I share with you resonates and you have an "aha" moment and would like to explore this further, you may find this extremely helpful and another important part of your tools of the mind "tool kit".

However I do realise that not everyone reading this will find this accessible or helpful. (Horses for courses and all that!)

The practise of working directly with our selves is all about giving voice (literally) to the different selves, working with the selves and overcoming the "stuckness" and the "attachment to states", that is the cause of so much of our inner resistance to any form of change.

Here is a quick overview of what this practise involves:

• "Checking in with yourself" and going with the first self that arises

• Asking the self that arises or presents itself it's name

• Inviting and allowing that self to speak - literally

• Asking it questions about its role and relationship to "me"

• Asking it about its relationship and connections with other selves

• Checking in to find other selves that are present

• Working with those selves to resolve conflicts

• Deciding which (positive) selves we wish to have as dominant selves

• Finding out what is needed to strengthen the chosen dominant selves

• Accessing and enlisting the support of our transcendent or highest self for the power and energy to allow the chosen selves to become and remain dominant

Sounds crazy doesn't it? But trust me, if you can do this stuff it's dynamite!