Unconditionally Loved

What Is True Love? rnDo you know how to love? Everyone wants to be loved unconditionally but are you able to give love unconditionally? What exactly is unconditional love and what does it take to love someone unconditionally? Unconditional love is love without limitations, conditions, or putting someone in the box of what you think they should be like or what they should do for you. This is true love. To love unconditionally you have torn• accept others for who they are, flaws and all; • be there for others just because, no reason necessary; • give with no stings attached and no need for anything in return; • LOVE YOURSELF and accept yourself with all your flaws. How To Love With AcceptancernWe always wish others can accept us for who we are but are unwilling to accept others for who they are. We judge, criticize and punish others who are different from us or don’t share our views and beliefs. This is far from unconditional love. To love others unconditionally we must accept them as they are with all their flaws. This means allowing them to be how they feel comfortable. If your boyfriend is a DJ who stays out late at night, then you have to accept his occupation and not give him attitude when he comes home in the wee hours of the morning. What about a cheating and abusive mate? You can still accept them for who they are but it doesn’t mean that you have to live with the abuse. First, accept it because you can’t change them. Second, confront them about how you feel about being abused. Be honest with yourself and your feelings. Let Your Feelings Be Your Guide. Third, either try to help them overcome the fears and emotional issues that causes the behaviour, or leave the relationship so that you protect yourself from further harm. How To Love Just BecausernTo love unconditionally we have to be there for others when they need us. No judgments. Sometime people just need someone to talk to and vent. Let them. Sometimes they just need space and time to themselves. Let them be. Sometimes they need laughter. Tell them a joke. There doesn’t have to be a reason. Being there in a way that they need you is enough. How To Love With No Strings AttachedrnGive, give, give. I once had a discussion with a friend about giving money to a beggar on the street that has an obvious drug problem, who claims he needs the money to buy food. My position was to not give him the money because I know he will use it to buy drugs and I don’t want to enable his habit. I thought I would be helping him. My friend’s position was to give him the money and let him decide what he wants to do with it because maybe, just maybe, he really would use the money to buy food. We had such a heated debate about this. Months later I sent him a message saying, “I got it!” Something in me realized that he was right. By not giving the money or by giving the money with the condition that he not buy drugs was a form of control. I was putting a limitation on the donation. This is not unconditional love. We must learn to give to others with no strings attached and let others receive the gift in a way that they see fit. This doesn’t mean that you enable a harmful habit. If you love others unconditionally, try to help them in any way you can but don’t try to control them. You have to let them be as they are. Lead them in the right direction so that they can make the right choices for themselves. In the case of the beggar, I would prefer to give him food than to give him money. How To LOVE YOURSELFrnPeople always say you can’t love others until you learn to love yourself. What does this really mean? What we feel internally will always manifest in our external reality. Therefore, how you feel about yourself is how you will allow others to treat you. That’s just how it is. If you don’t think you’re worthy, you will allow others to treat you as if you’re not important. In addition, the judgments you put on yourself, you will also put on others. Love yourself. Be kind to yourself. Take good care of yourself. Don’t be so hard on yourself. We all make mistakes. Learn from your mistakes, grow into a better person, then let them go. Accept yourself, not just the good, but also the flaws. The flaws are just as much apart of who you are. The unconditional love that you give to yourself can easily be given to others and will come back to you full circle.