When a Door Opens; Walk Through

So many of us say we want something to change. Common things I hear from my clients include:nn*I want to get unstuckn*I wish I could get organizedn*If only I could change jobs, start a business, or earn more moneyn*I want to feel more vitally alive and at peace

A lot of times the explanation of how or when they will really make the changes they most desire in their life starts with “Well, when I get more organized/settled/balanced or have more time/money then I will _______.” Do any of these sound familiar to you? When was the last time you had “spare money” or “perfect balance”? My guess is, not lately.

Well, here’s the thing, when a door opens, even if it is only the tiniest little crack…you need to walk through that opening. Otherwise, nothing happens.

Last night my partner and I hosted my community’s monthly meditation gathering. It was a fine gathering of eight women some who come every month and others there for the first time. Regardless of who is present it is always a sacred circle of women who show up for one another unconditionally. THAT alone is powerful.

This night we used our breath, movement, sound, words, and silence to get grounded and connected – with those present, other people in our lives, and the greater whole of all beings that share the melting pot of energy that is our world.

It was a particularly powerful meditation. One of those magical times that can’t really be explained, it must be experienced.

At the end of our meditative time we always go around the circle to listen to each person’s experience. If ever you needed proof that every individual has their own unique experience, these moments of sharing are that proof. The women gathered shared everything from “The words were so beautiful and made me feel peaceful” to “I kept feeling like I just wished you would shut up – too many words!”. Many, me included shared the experience of being moved in a very physical way and included tears, nausea, anxiety, physical discomfort, and deep love and peace.

Someone asked, “Why so physical?” First off in our world we are not encouraged to feel what we’re feeling. It is just not acceptable. We are expected to push or mask our feelings. As a culture we’re good at doing that by numbing out to television, shopping, keeping crazy busy, stuffing ourselves with food, or taking the edge off with alcohol or drugs. Think about the rituals of our time. If you lose someone close to you, you are allotted only 3 bereavement days from work and then expected to get back at it and be productive. This is not a society that honors feelings.

So, when we make the conscious choice to enter a sacred space and give ourselves permission to feel, it can be overwhelming – physically, emotionally, intellectually, spiritually. When this happens we instantly feel like apologizing. For what? I guess just for being human.

Have you ever found yourself apologizing for no particular reason - just for being who you are, having feelings or expressing yourself? I know I have. When you do this you dishonor yourself and sabotage your confidence and self-esteem.

Here’s what I know for sure. When you have experiences like the one our group created in the meditation, it is an invitation to open. When your feelings arrive strongly at your door, it is an invitation to feel and honor them. When you feel overwhelmed at your humanness, it is an invitation to lean into the experience of being a human being on this planet.

What I also know for sure is that when these experiences, feelings, and awarenesses open a door to you, whether it is the tiniest of cracks or a big gaping hole, you need to walk through. When you choose to ignore the invitation you dishonor yourself and quite plainly set yourself up for staying stuck exactly where you are right now.

Do you really want your life to look the same as it does right now in 1, 5, 10, or 20 years? Do you want to be the same person you are today in the future? Or, do you want to experience life more fully, succeed on your own terms, and live a life that leaves a legacy instead of a trail of regrets?

Here’s the good and bad news…you get to choose.

The choice is always yours each day in every moment. And, if you see a door opening even if it feels scary and overwhelming…take just one baby step. Move ever so slightly toward walking through that opening. The deepest part of your soul and the highest self part of you will thank you.