Why People Do Not Start a Business Today, Reason #8 Self-Sabatoge
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Sabotage; as defined in the dictionary is any undermining of a cause.
"You can't do that!" "That's way too difficult!" "If you try, you'll probably just fail anyway." These statements sound as if they're coming from someone with a cruel mission to destroy self-confidence. Unfortunately, we can be the “someone” and our target can be our self.
Negative self-talk or sometimes called Monkey Chatter is something we have all probably engaged in at some time. When it rears its ugly head on a regular basis it, it can lead to self-sabotage, and can stop us and in some cases paralyze a person from achieving their goals and dreams. The worse part is we usually don't recognize what we are doing to ourselves. Instead, we attribute our lack of success to inadequacy or being unlucky. This mind-set will strengthen the negative messages we tell ourselves, and we get caught in a self-sabotaging cycle that can be very difficult to break.
A simple way to tell if you are sabotaging your self is when you grind to a halt while you're trying to achieve your goals, for no rational reason. When you feel like you are stuck in quick sand and the only way is down, or you tell yourself to quit you are not capable of success. The skill, ability and desire are there just seems as something is stopping you from moving forward. When you begin to feel that you can't do something you should be able to do, or have done before self-sabotage is at work.
Self-sabotage behavior can leave you feeling frustrated, discouraged, and trapped in a situation you desperately want to change. Self-sabotage behaviors are irrational and illogical, and they will destroy your self-esteem and self-confidence!
Everyone sabotages themselves from time to time. Unfortunately, sometimes we sabotage ourselves to the point of not being able to live the successful, happy life we really want to live.
Here are a few questions you can ask yourself (honestly) to determine if you might be self-sabotaging yourself:
• Is procrastination a regular part of your day?
• Do you have a difficult time getting motivated to do the things you really
want to do?
• Did you tell yourself that this would be your year to succeed, but despite
this promise to yourself, you are still not living the life you truly want
to live?
• Do your love relationships seem destined to fall apart?
• Do people often misunderstand your intentions?
• Do you feel as if people in your life are constantly criticizing you?
• Do you ever experience depression, anxiety or panic attacks, even when
there is no logical reason for them?
• Do you ever feel resentment or anger over not having more control over the
events in your life?
Self-sabotage behavior damages your self-esteem and causes you to lose confidence in yourself, which is reflected to those around you by your attitude, comments and non-verbal communications. Self-sabotage can create feelings of frustration, discouragement, resentment, anger and panic. Most significantly, it stops you from doing and having the things you really want to have in your life.
So, let’s explore some ways you can overcome self sabotage. You have to let go, trust in the flow of life and begin to trust yourself. Do not allow other peoples opinions of you dictate what you believe and never do something to make someone approve of you if it’s not the way you would normally act, it is impossible to please everyone all the time.
In life we have to choose our battles we will fight and sometimes the best way to handle a situation if someone let you down either forgive them and understand that’s just the way they are or move on from them. Our actions will either lead to outcomes or consequences, you control your own life and no one else is responsible for the situations you find yourself in. You can not blame everyone else for what happens to you, if you do you are only sabotaging yourself.
Don’t be so hard on yourself, life is about learning and growing not instantly having the answer for everything. Self-sabotage needs to be recognized and addressed if you plan on moving forward as a successful business owner, because sometimes it is just you & the little mouse in your pocket that is moving in the same direction. Cut yourself some slack and talk kindly to yourself like you would talk to a loving friend, you will be surprised at the results you will experience. You may find you really like yourself!
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About the Author
Robin Hardy is well known for her expertise in guiding men & women into creating tangible actionable results through Media Training, PR Consulting, Creative Development, Marketing and Business Plans. With her 12 years of experience Robin ensures that her clients create a solid sense of direction leading to greater profitability. Her methods empower people to stretch beyond their limitations, re-invent through a solid sense of self-esteem and deepen their levels of confidence for unstoppable success. Robin speaks nationally, teaches on college campuses and coaches individuals, small business owners and entrepreneurs. As Development Director & Feminine Leader for The Amazing Woman’s Day Movement she contributes her insights to empowering women entrepreneurs and business owners. Whether it be as an Empowered Options Coach, An Inspirational Speaker, An Author or host of Empowering you Radio, there’s one thing for certain; Robin is dedicated to helping others achieve their wildest dreams. www.RobinHardy.net
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