Wife's Friend Is Ruining Our Marriage: Wife's Friend Causing Problems - How To Save Marriage

Wife's Friend Is Ruining Our Marriage: Wife's Friend Causing Problems - How To Save Marriage "Boundaries? I have no clue what those are and why I need them," said the older woman as she shared her thoughts. "Well, for starters," I added, "You have adult children who have been taking advantage of you. You do realize that, don't you?" "Well, yes I know, but I can't let them live on the streets can I", she asked. "No, you don't, but you can prepare them for taking care of themselves down the road and that's what you should be doing." She looked at me for several seconds then agreed. Boundaries are important for establishing personal ground rules to avoid fights and arguments with the people you care about. Actually, boundaries help you keep your rules enforced. Wise parents place boundaries on their young children to protect them from harm. Remember these? "Don't cross the street without looking! Keep your fingers away from the burners on the stove! Make sure you tell mom or dad where you are going!" We learned at an early age that if these boundaries were crossed then we faced the consequences. As children get older and approach their teens the rules change and so do the boundaries. A few examples: "Son, I want you to keep your room clean which means you don't throw everything in your closet!" Be home by 8:00 PM! It's a school night." "I don't want you hanging around that neighbor kid - he's a trouble maker." Throughout their growing up years it's important to keep boundaries in place and make them age-appropriate. Over the years I have learned that as we get older we tend to lose our focus and forget our own boundaries. I see it all the time in my practice. Many adults cannot set boundaries for themselves. It happens in work relationships, marriages, with close friends, etc. Following are a few examples I help people with: 1. An adult child keeps asking their senior parents for money to pay for cell phone bills, rent, car payments, and food. Why should you pay for their living expenses? How do you feel about paying for their personal expenses? Probably not very good. You don't want to hurt their feelings so you keep writing checks or giving them cash. They are breaking the bank and you are probably paying their bills from your retirement funds. If this is a problem for you, it's time to set up some boundaries for them and yourself. Find out how to get your spouse to go crazy head over heels for you and desire you in a way you have never experienced! You will be amazed at how good it feels to have your spouse's attention and affection again - Learn more here 2. You are in a marriage that you feel taken advantage of. Your spouse leaves all the housework to you. You work full time and are taking care of the kids plus making all the meals. Does this seem fair to you? Of course not but you are afraid to confront your spouse. You ask for help with some of the household chores and your spouse says he will help but never does. 3. You want help in determining how the money is being spent on expenses for the home. You ask your spouse to sit down with you and go over the bills but they rather use the credit card and not hear about the bills. What do you do and how do you set boundaries to bring peace to yourself and the home? Boundaries in marriage are key to preventing all kinds of problems. They are simple to set up if both of you are willing to be honest and put them into place. Make sure you share with your spouse the needs you have and why! What areas are off limits to your spouse? If you need 8 hours of sleep and your husband or wife turns on the TV to watch the late night news and you are trying to sleep tell them that is a boundary that cannot be crossed. Another boundary is the way you spend your money. Do you have an agreement with your husband or wife that you will check in with them if any item is over a certain amount? That may one of your boundaries that you both agree on. I had a client who liked to BBQ. The grill they owned was beat up and old. He was at Home Depot picking up some lumber and walked past the grills. He stopped, took a look at one, and without calling her spent $600 and brought it home. The fight over that purchased almost ended their marriage! Discover one of the most destructive things you're probably doing to your marriage right now that is destroying your chances of saving it. Learn the key tips to make your spouse turn towards you instead of turning away - Learn more here Let's say you have a co-worker who dumps extra work on you but you see them spending a lot of time at the water cooler talking to co-workers about last nights baseball game. They ask you for the "favor of a lifetime" and plead for your help. Or the boss has a favorite employee that never get's their work done and she asks you to help him catch up. What do you do? You may have a boss who is verbally abusive towards you. They may insult your intelligence with name calling and insults. You drive home a mess - shaking at the steering wheel, crying and swearing to yourself that you will never allow your boss to abuse you like that ever again, yet it happens again and again! When you feel that you're being taken advantage of, that's when you set boundaries for yourself. Boundaries are key to keeping things under control in your life. It's how you let people know that you will not allow them to step on your toes. Boundaries keep us from having lingering anger towards someone who is violating our "line in the sand". It's OK to have boundaries with the people we come into contact with. So, how do we set up boundaries and make them stick? Write them down and who they will affect.rnKnow why they need boundaries.rnWhat are the consequences if they violate your boundaries?rnSit down with the person or persons and explain why you need to have boundaries with them.rnLet them ask questions so they understand why you need them.rnIf you're setting boundaries with your spouse, be sensitive with them. Slamming them with your demands never works. Explain why they are important with you. Get their feedback. These suggestions are for starters. Sit down and talk to your spouse, friend or family member. They will help you open up and get you headed in the right direction Thinking about regaining the status of "Happily Married"? It is possible, and is not difficult if you think it is not. But exactly how you do so? If you would like the source most couples used to revive their relationship, strengthened their marriage, regain trust and love in the marriage and not giving up then visit this Helpful Site. To learn how to save your marriage even if alone at first, then check out this plan of actions that is 100% guaranteed. Over 60,000 couples were able to save their marriages by doing the very same series of steps that you could be doing. If they saved their marriages then you can too! Click Here to see how it's done... When a married man starts to feel as though his wife is pulling away from him, panic can set in. Visions of an impending separation and eventual divorce dance in your head. You're concerned that at any moment the woman you married may tell you that she's not happy with the relationship and wants out. If you genuinely feel that your wife doesn't adore you anymore, you need to act quickly to save the relationship. You can get your wife to love you again. It's actually possible to rebuild the marriage so it's closer and more fulfilling than it's ever been. If you want to get your wife to love you again, you have to be willing to own up to your own mistakes. A great place to start on rebuilding the lost connection is to make amends for anything you've done that has hurt her. Start by saying you're sorry. Then show her you mean it by changing your behavior. When it comes to making a sincere apology, actions really do speak much louder than words. You also must be willing to change if you want to get your wife to love you again. This means improving who you are as a man. If you have bad habits that get under your wife's skin now is the time to work on changing those. You can also make the effort to be more romantic and attentive. If she sees that you're making a serious attempt to better yourself, she'll feel closer to you again. There are two emotions that you are probably holding onto that may be pushing your spouse into the arms (and eventually the bed) OF SOMEONE ELSE. Find out what those emotions are and how to keep them under check- Click Here Do you remember back when you two first met? Think back to how you treated your wife then. You were attentive and loving. You did whatever you could to make her life easier. Once you two settled into married life that may have changed. You may have stopped focusing so much on her because there were so many other things in your life that needed attention. Start treating her like the cherished woman that she is to you. Make every attempt you can to ensure she knows how much you love her on a daily basis. Start dating your wife again. There's no rule written anywhere that says that a husband can't invite his wife out on a date. If you want to get her to love you again, woo her the same way you did back in the early days of your courtship. Bring her flowers, write her love messages and simply shower her with affection. She'll love it and you for making her feel so completely and utterly special. Are you tired of living in a relationship in which you feel neglected? Many married people find themselves feeling alone and rejected by their spouse. If you feel taken for granted, there's a way to change that now. To learn more about how to transform your marriage so your spouse loves and adores you more than they ever has before, visit this helpful site. When as a couple you want to stop a divorce from happening; you go to marriage counseling, and try to sort things out. But what if you want to save your marriage alone? How could marriage counseling work then, when your spouse wants a divorce but you don't? This feeling of being alone is highly dangerous, unfortunately. It makes people do all the wrong things to save their marriages; they are so wrong that they end up harming the marriage even further rather than helping save it. Why? Because when you see your marriage circling down the drain, you feel desperate and you feel that you have to "do something!" before it all slips away. You feel the urgent need to take some sort of action. While it's definitely correct that you need to take action; in a desperate state of mind you don't know what to do, where to turn. So you are tempted to do the only thing you can think of. If you’re on the verge of divorce… Or if your spouse is cheating on you… Or if your marriage JUST PLAIN ISN’T WORKING… I strongly urge you to read everything on the next page before it's too late and time runs out- Click Here Begging. I have been in your shoes and unfortunately, I felt that terrible temptation to just beg my husband for forgiveness, for everything. And I wasn't able to resist it - but predictably, it harmed my marriage even further. Why is something so obviously harming so tempting to do? It's the desperation running rampant in your brain. It's your emotions overtaking your mind and clouding your judgment and rationality. If you want to stop a divorce and save your marriage, the first thing you need to do is to learn to calm down. I was taught to calm down - and this set me on the right track to save my marriage. Do not allow your feelings to overwhelm you and make you do wrong things. You need calm, considerate and well thought actions; not some momentary knee-jerk reaction that will make everything even worse. Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was. Click here to save your marriage and rebuild it into a more connected, satisfying relationship. Going by human nature, we value most of the goodies in life, be it car, house, clothes, and we can even go further to have it for ourselves, but money could be the constraint. But God's values system is completely different from ours, he places the greatest fulfillment of our urgent need at no price at all, Our Redemption. The same thing goes in marriage, God gave the first man, Adam, He gave him Eve, God gave Adam a treasure but the treasure is in a weaker vessel, in the same vein God has given husbands wives; precious to behold, motivational in speech, comforting and loving, wisdom, foresight, responsibilities, contribution, second decisions and counsel but God decided to place these treasures within their fragile, delicate, and weak figures and their frailty in nature may be the reason while most husband don't value their wives. But behind this frailty is embedded all that could be useful in the home as a wife and as a mother. My dear friend you should appreciate the hidden treasure of wisdom of wisdom, foresight, sound decision and the counsel of your good and godly wife. Although she may respect you and willfully submit to you, yet she must not be treated as a slave. Husband, dwell with your wives in wife in wisdom, relate with your wife in tenderness so as to be able to bring out and harness the hidden treasure embedded in her fragile figure. Love her wholeheartedly and you'll benefit and enjoy all that God put within your wife. Now Listen Carefully- Take 2 minutes to visit the next page and you'll discover a stunning trick which will make your spouse love you for the rest of their lives even if they are this close to walking out the door. Yes, you can indeed save your marriage no matter how hopeless the situation seems. Take the right step now and live to enjoy a blissful marriage. I strongly urge you to visit the next page- Click Here