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Articles by Debbi Dickinson

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56 articles by Debbi Dickinson · showing 50

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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Are you active or productive?

I have a very busy life. Toss my daughter’s calendar of activities on top of my own and we are always on the go. We are very active and we are productive when we are focused on our priorities. An active life is where you are busy. You have a lot of tasks you are doing but you don’t seem to be moving in a forward direction in your life. A productive life is where you are making improvements along the way. You are growing and stretching yourself.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,539 views3/5 (1)
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

You Bring Your Own Weather To The Picnic

How often are you someplace enjoying yourself and someone walks in with the dark cloud hanging over their head? They can immediately pull the energy down with those around them. I think of the character Ross in the movie Monsters Inc. She is the grumbly administrative person who has a nasally voice that whines at an irritable pitch that is like finge ails on a chalk board. Her glass is half empty and feels everyone around should have their glass half empty as well. Listening to her talk in her flat voice just sucks the energy out of the air around her.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Giving Back To Our Community - A Mother and Daughter Experience

This past weekend my 13-year old daughter and I volunteered to perform a day of service work in our community. Our commitment to service work started when she was 5 years old and we volunteered time at our church selling pumpkins during October. She knew that the pumpkins were grown by Navajo Indian farmers for income. Having sold pumpkins for the past 8 years, autumn isn't the same unless we serve our time in the pumpkin path and her of sharing with customers whom their money is benefiting.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,520 views
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Who is Draining Your Emotional Energy?

We all have people in our lives that have a tendency to drain our emotional energy. It may be a family member, a child, our boss or a friend. What I have come to understand is that everyone wants to be loved. People do not come into our lives purposefully to drain us emotionally. We allow it to happen. I see two aspects of how this happens.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,317 views4/5 (1)
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How One Holiday Tradition Returned

The Holidays bring about good and bad memories of past holiday seasons. I have a girlfriend Nancy who newly divorced is having her first Thanksgiving without the kids this year. It's tough; there is no denying it. Thanksgiving will be different for her; but that doesn't mean it'll be bad. We've talked about my first Thanksgiving without my daughter and new traditions I put in place when celebrating as a single person. For me, service work was a blessing.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,400 views
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

My Plan - The Importance of Sticking to It

My marathon training is well underway. With the heat wave coming through the Chicago area the past several weeks, it has been miserable running conditions. But I have been reminded of what I tell other women; develop a plan and stick to it. No Excuses! So for my running schedule calling out a 4 mile run tomorrow and knowing the heat index will be 110; it means that for personal safety I can't run at my preferred time which is the end of the day or sometimes lunch.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,680 views
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Why Free Floating Anxiety Drives Me Crazy

Do you ever have times in your life when everything is going great yet you just have this nagging feeling that impending doom is on the horizon? It’s like waiting for the other shoe to drop. You aren’t quite sure where the problem will come from, but you are convinced there will be a problem. That is Free Floating Anxiety. My personal belief is that we feel this way because we have had times in our past where life was humming along smoothly and we got hit with a negative life event out of the blue. You’ve probably had this experience a few times in your past.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How To Build Confidence FAST!

Do you know someone who seems to effortlessly achieve goals they set out to accomplish? And they reach those goals quickly? Their secret is simple – self-confidence. Part of healing from divorce is the quest for rebuilding of self-confidence that can erode over time in a marriage. Here are ideas you can implement immediately to gain confidence in achieving your goals:

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,488 views
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Responding to the Call of Self-Love

What is Self-Love? For me, Self-Love means that I am making my needs a priority in my life. Society teaches women to put the needs of others in front of ourselves. For years I did that. Work came first. When I married, my husband came first. Then when my daughter was born her needs also came before mine. I was exhausted since I gave everything I had to those around me. I was clueless that my soul was crying out for attention. Overtime, I lost the essence of who I was as a woman since I was so focused on others.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,633 views4/5 (1)
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Do Not Hold Back

What happens when we hold back? I know for me, I feel like I have not given my full effort. It may be a project I am working on, it may be making dinner or it may be my contribution in an office meeting.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How to Keep Your Options Open

Do you set your eyes on a goal and keep your focus and energy on attaining it? Your goal may be a promotion, saving for European vacation or getting Christmas presents bought in record time. I can have tunnel vision when I’m focused on a goal. It amazes some of my friends that when I get into my zone; I can laser in and work relentlessly to attain whatever I set my eyes on. What I have learned is that keeping my laser focus can also be a liability if I do not keep my options open.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How are You Steering Your Life?

From what viewpoint are you looking at your life? Are you looking in the rear-view mirror or are you looking through your windshield? Looking through your rear-view mirror is viewing life with chains of the past. Some of these chains may be limiting beliefs that were drilled into your head as a young girl. “You will work in the family business” “Girls are never good at math or science” “You are not smart enough to graduate from college”

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

The Future Holds the Same Stuff as Today

How often we lament ‘When ___ happens my life will be better’. The blank may be a job, marriage, new baby or even divorce. What you can count on is that your life will be altered; but will it be better? My experience has been that my life gets better when I work on me. If I rely upon exte al events or people for my happiness; I will be in for a disappointment. We can’t wave a magic wand and instantly transform our life into happiness.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How Women are Wired Differently tha Men

No surprise to any woman to hear that we are wired differently than men. We approach life differently and we remember events differently. As a broad brush statement, men compartmentalize their memory of events and the emotions. As women, we are wired to tie our emotions around each experience in our lives. Then the emotional ties intertwine with other similar events. I remember my first awareness of this back when I was dating in my twenties.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How a Corn Maze Helped Me Stay Present

I am always surprised where Life Lessons appear. I have been so busy wrapped up in quite a few projects that I knew I was losing my sense of being present. Instead of being ‘in the moment’ my thoughts start drifting off to my To Do list. When that happens life is slipping by and I don’t realize to what extent until some event jars me back into the present.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How Acceptance Sets You Free

Acceptance of events or other people is key to our emotional freedom. It is an emotional process to realize that we don't have control over situations or people and we stop resisting. I originally believed that acceptance meant I needed to like a situation and that I was okay with the outcome. That statement couldn't be further from the truth. Acceptance does NOT mea I need to like a situation, an outcome or even a person. Acceptance is an understanding that the situation is what it is or a person is the way they are and I stop resisting.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Use Goal Setting To Achieve Your Dreams

Goal Setting is one of those important aspects of life that I never did single or married. I have always just gone with the flow. Not saying that is a bad; it is I just didn't have any focus and just moved along with life events as they unfolded. After my divorce with my life in complete array, I knew that I needed to start choosing my priorities differently. Four years ago, I was attending a company workshop on Goal Setting and the coach asked us if the life we are living today is what we want in 10 years.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,072 views
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

The Beauty of Life’s Lessons

Life lessons can appear in the most unexpected places. I was working on one of my blogs last week at the kitchen table. The smoke alarm starts ringing. I look up and can see smoke coming out of the oven which triggered the alarm. My teenage daughter had just 5 minutes prior put cookies in the oven to bake. I holler for her to come into the kitchen and as you can imagine she is freaking out. We open up the oven door and I see that she put the cookie dough on wax paper that was melting and smoking. I told her what was causing the smoke and told her to pull out the cookie trays.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

It Can Be Tough to Change Our Behavior

I was recently reminded how tough it can be to change our behaviors. When we identify something about ourselves we want to change, it can be difficult to sustain the new behavior in the beginning. It may be that we want to be more tolerant, patient or minimize our need to be perfect. This story is about my 14-year-old daughter wanting to act more like an adult.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Top Secrets to Stepping into your Greatness

The phrase ‘Your Greatness’ can be called different things. It could be ‘Your Destiny’, ‘Your Purpose’, or even ‘Your Calling’. What each of these phrases speak to is ‘what are you on this planet for?’ The thought can be overwhelming! Perhaps immediately followed by ‘I haven’t a clue!’ Life would be so much easier if our parents were given a certificate at birth that stated ‘Future Physician’ or ‘Future Adventure Seeker.’ Wouldn’t it be nice to know from birth what direction we should be steering our life?

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Having Confidence to Ask for What You Want

I can’t even begin to count how many times I wanted something but the fear of being told ‘No’ held me back from even asking a question. I am much more confident today tha I used to be just a few years ago, but it is still something I need to watch for. Work environment comes to mind immediately for me and for those I coach. We do our jobs and expect to be acknowledged. It could be recognition or it could even be a promotion we deserve. When we watch others get what we feel we have earned it upsets us.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Set Goals Not Resolutions To Achieve Results

There was a time in my life that every New Year's I would set resolutions. For me, they seemed to be focused more around my health: Lose weight, exercise more, break a bad habit. Sound familiar? I found that they were focused more around what I should NOT be doing versus who I should strive to be. I usually found that by second or third week of January I reverted back to old habits and the resolutions were forgotten; well at least ignored to be honest. After many unsuccessful years of trying to stick to my resolutions; I finally just gave up making them.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

What a Random Act of Kindness Means to Me

I was in a drive-thru line at Starbuck’s last week when I had the sudden urge to do a random act of kindness. I paid for the coffee of the person behind me. What was a very pleasant morning all of a sudden turned into an exceptional morning because I stepped outside of myself to make a stranger's day a bit brighter.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How To Survive Your First Christmas Alone While Your Child Spends It with the Ex

My daughter was 7 years old when she spent her first Christmas with my Ex after the divorce. Having spent the 3 prior Christmas’ with just the two of us, the thought of not having her with me filled me with mixed emotion. To add to this, I do not have any family that lives within 1000 miles of where I lived and faced the prospect of spending my Christmas alone. Wanting to have a joyful Christmas, I lived by the three following guidelines.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Top Reason to Set Goals

I love the week betwee Christmas and New Year’s. Everyone is still in a festive mood and the stress of the holiday season is winding down. I enjoy the after-Christmas sales and I usually take the week off between the holidays. My number one favorite activity this last week of the year is reviewing the goals I set for myself last year and seeing how much I have accomplished over the past year. Every year I am amazed at how much I can accomplish if I do one simple thing. That one thing is writing down my goals!

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
1,279 views2.3/5 (4)
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How Discipline Gave Me Freedom

Discipline was one of those words I truly disliked for a long time. Growing up I associated discipline with negative words like detention or being grounded. As I became an adult, the word started changing meaning into being rigid, inflexible and most importantly boring. The last thing I wanted to be was boring. I wanted to be care-free and creative. I couldn’t see the connection between discipline and creativity.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

I am Not My Business Card

My professional focus during my twenties and thirties was defining who I was as a professional woman. This entailed long days and weekends. It also required quite a bit of travel and for a few years 100% travel as a consultant. My career progressed along nicely. As I took on more and more responsibility the title on my business card became more important to me. Whatever title I had at any given time wasn't good enough; was always looking at the next rung up the ladder that I wanted to progress to. I am competitive there is no doubt about it.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Passing On My Empathy

I was recently on a business trip to Guadalajara. On the return flight a young family was seated a couple of rows up from me. They had a 2 and 4-year-old traveling with them. Once the plane took off, the 2-year-old girl made it quite clear that she was not a happy camper with the air pressure in her little head and started wailing at the top of her lungs to the horror of her parents. It immediately took me back to the time when I traveled with my 2-year-old daughter and had a similar experience. She cried from the moment we took off from Denver to the moment we landed in Chicago.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Thoughts of Impending Doom

During a conversation with one of my VIPs this week, we were discussing how well her life was going and how she's making progress in various areas of her life. But she was sharing that she was antsy and couldn't put her finger on the reason why. She told me "I am waiting for something bad to happen; because something always does."

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How to Accept That I Am Very Human

Whether it's being late to your child's school play or missing a deadline at the office, many women feel guilty about not being able to do it all. We mentally start beating ourselves up with the would've, could've, should've This negative thinking is not healthy, it affects our emotional well-being or ourselves and those around. Overtime, it impacts our health. So, how to eliminate guilty thoughts?

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Today’s Expectations is Tomorrow’s Resentments

Can I have expectations in my life? Absolutely you can. But for many expectations set are unrealistic and when their expectation is not met it forms resentment. A friend was sharing recently when she was a child, her mother set expectations for how she should behave. The expectations were not age appropriate nor did the mother provide any guidance on how she should meet this expectation. The mother gathered resentments and my friend felt growing up that she was a huge disappointment for her mother. That is a lose-lose situation.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Dating Isn't What It Used To Be

One of my VIP's is ready to head back into the world of dating. She knew I had dated quite a few years (5 years to be exact!) before Grand Dude came into my life. We were talking about the differences of dating when you are in your 40's versus in your 20's. Dating sites on the internet is most definitely one of the differences. Today 20% of relationships can trace their origin back to an online dating site.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Are You Into Action or Into Complaining?

I recently had one of those life flashbacks that can make your stomach turn. For me, it was all the complaining I use to do. I would whine about the injustices of my life. Raising my fist to The Big Guy and exclaiming how could you do this to me. It was easy to sit around and do nothing but complain. What was difficult was actually doing something about my situation.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

The Badger Deep Inside Me

There was a time when I was not effective at setting boundaries in my life. I was the push-over that people knew they could get me to do tasks they didn't want to. This wasn't just in one part of my life; it was everywhere. Debbi just couldn't say No. What would happen is that I would plaster the smile to my face and say 'Sure, I can do that' and that would be the seeds of my resentment. Overtime the resentment would grow until it would get to that boiling over point.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

The Top Secret to Performing Courageous Acts

My definition of courage is to feel the fear and do it anyway. Through recovery regardless if it’s divorce or addiction; I see women continuously performing courageous acts. These are actions they take that move them forward and they need to be acknowledged and celebrated. So, what would be a courageous act?

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How My GPS Reminded Me of Faith

Grand Dude and I are training for a fall marathon. We both have all the gadgets, shoes, etc. I have a GPS watch that I absolutely adore. It frees me from marked trails since it'll keep tabs of how far I've run. Last week I was on one of my long runs and about the last mile, the battery suddenly went dead. I thought, it just needs a recharge. So, I plugged it in and charged it right back up. I went on a run the next day and I was only ½ mile into it and the battery died again.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Learn to Quiet Your Harsh Ego

I use to be my own worst critic when I use to fall short of my expectations of myself. It didn't matter if my expectations were big or small; all would have me chastising myself for being less that superwoman. And that is my ego, desiring to be the best mother, friend, worker, manager, lover, etc. And it wasn't enough to be the best; I had to be perfect. Anything less than perfect was unacceptable. The result was I tore myself down because I am human. I would take out the imaginary bat and hit myself over the head repeating 'You are Not Good Enough'.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Am I Being Old Fashioned in regards to Dating?

I have women ask me about dating etiquette. Essentially do the traditional dating rules still apply today? The answer is mostly they do. So, here is my take. I believe when on a date, the gentleman pays. Pure and simple; if I have to pull out my wallet to pay for anything on the first date … there will be no second date. No exceptions. Are doors opened and chairs pulled out for me … yes, they should be.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How To Breakthrough The Roadblocks To Achieve Your Goals?

This week I’ve been working on a new product for my website. I found myself very busy doing a lot of activities; but discovered that I was not being effective. Instead of working on the product development, I allowed myself to be distracted and working on other minor tasks. Overtime I have learned that when I’m not moving forward but am very busy; I need to ask myself why am I holding myself back? The answer nearly always comes back that I’m allowing Fear to creep into my life.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

The Secret on Learning to Let Go

Letting Go is a process. Letting Go means to stop giving attention to particular person or past experience and to focus on the here and now. We hold on to the past because of our emotions. It may be painful or joyful memories. When we hang on to the past, we are clouding our view of the present. And we all do it!r

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Blessings of Our Christmas Tree Tradition

Like most families we have our Christmas traditions. For us, the Christmas tree is the first tradition of the season. We go to the same tree lot every year on the first weekend of December to pick our tree and we decorate it that evening. It is a special time for us to really connect and reminisce on past Christmases.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

What Kind of Day are You Choosing to Have?

What kind of day are you choosing to have? It can be so easy for a life event to take control of our mood for the day; that is IF we allow that to happen. We have a choice every moment on the type of day we are going to have. A recent conversation with a girlfriend really drove this point home with me.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

How to Decrease Your Carbon Footprint

Sometimes I hear the funniest lines that I just need to share. I have a girlfriend that talks a mile a minute. She is high-energy and has a mind that collects LOTS of facts and data points that she can retrieve at a snap of a finger. The result is that with a given topic you can receive a ton of information in a very short period of time. Your head can spin at times at the amount of detail and how quickly it is delivered. One day, my friend told me a comment that was made to her about the level of detail she shares.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

What Happens to Me When I'm Not Perfect?

Do you struggle with trying to be the perfect woman? I do. Like most that struggle with perfectionism, I know it’s wrapped into my ego and insecurities. I consciously know that I need to lighten up on my expectations of myself, but in execution it can be difficult. This morning as I was getting ready to have coffee with girlfriends before heading into the office, I put on a grey skirt, top and my grey stockings. Seated with my friends in light better than my bedroom, to my horror, I realized that I was wearing my forest green stockings instead of grey.

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Why It Feels Good for Relatives to Leave

I will raise my hand and admit. I love to have my parents come in tow AND I also love to see them go home. I LOVE my parents. I enjoy spending time with my parents; we always have a fabulous time. Picking them up at the airport is a joy-filled event and so is dropping them off at the airport. Why?r

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Are you a CAVE Dweller?

There was an extended period of time in my life where I was a CAVE dweller. We all know people that are. CAVE is an acronym for Citizens Against Virtually Everything. CAVE dwellers are the people that look at life as a glass that is half full and complain about it. They complain loudly about the injustices that life has heaped upon their shoulders and have no problems letting you know about it. That use to be me!

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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By Debbi DickinsonRecently published1 topic

Taming my Over-Commitment Monster

My inner monsters are those characteristics about myself that I don’t like very much. These are traits that I’ve worked hard at over the years to minimize; but occasionally one will rear its ugly head. Some of these character defects are: anger, pride, procrastination, over-committing, perfectionist, people pleasing and the list goes on and on. Discussing this with friends recently, one of them commented that these defects never go away; they just get watered down. And I whole-heartedly agree. What keeps my inner monsters watered down are the tools I’ve picked up over the years.r

Primary topic: Spiritual Growth
Spiritual Growth
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