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Articles by James Krehbiel

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24 articles by James Krehbiel · showing 24

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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Shedding Self-Doubt, Creating Confidence

After discussing the creation of clear boundaries with Mark, he responded with, "I'm confused." This reaction typifies those with self-doubt who have troubles with sorting and sifting. They don't trust their instincts to generate an empowering decision. Rather, self-doubters cling to their cocoon in an attempt to avoid the inevitability of appropriate action. Mark’s grown children disapproved of a new, intimate relationship that was very important to him. Mark’s narrative was one of being intricately entwined with his children and ex-wife in a codependent relationship.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

The Identity of Imperfection

When Alex was a kid, he recalls his father chastising him for not washing the car properly. Alex volunteered his services as a five-year-old child, but his dad showed little appreciation. On the contrary, when he "missed a spot," his father would berate him by calling him stupid. He was a sensitive child who wanted to please his father, but ended up feeling devalued. Over time, Alex associated his less than perfect performance with his personal identity. If what he did was less than acceptable, then by all means he must be defective.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Eradicating Depression Through Schema-Focused Therapy

Samantha moved to a large sprawling city to join her boyfriend. They carried on a long-distance relationship prior to her decision to move in with him. Unfortunately, the relationship did not last long, and she felt stuck in a city without a plan to move forward in a positive direction – she sank into a deep depression. This young lady had parents who were extremely passive and detached. Having lived in a rural town, her options for activity were limited. Her parents never encouraged involvement in outside interests. She lacked confidence and was timid around age-mates.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Heroes and Role Models: The People We Admire

I think that it is important to make a distinction between some heroic figures that we value and the role models that have impacted our lives. What are the characteristics that differentiate heroes from people who have acted as role models for us? How do heroes and role models affect our behavior and the way we relate to the world? People tend to idealize their heroes and believe that heroes live in a world of perfection. I recall the candlelight vigils and the mou ing that marked the death of singer John Lennon in 1980.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

REFLECTIONS ON SUCCESSFUL LIVING

Stepping out of the bubble means moving on, no matter what circumstances arise. It means being a fighter, the kind of fighter that never gives up hope. We can envision what we want the future to hold. Then we must go out into the world and make it happen. Complete failure is not an option. ...

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Make Way for a Different Kind of Thinking

I distinctly recall when Nathan began seeing me for counseling. He was a skinny, sensitive kid with a big heart. At age 13, he struggled in the midst of a tumultuous custody battle that left emotional scars. My job was to prop him up - to give him hope that things would change for the better - and they did. Nathan came back to see me three years after he had "graduated" from therapy. He brought his new guitar and treated me to few melodies in the privacy of my own office. He was serenading me - it was a gift for being there for him.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Dichotomous Thinking within the Therapeutic Community

In cognitive therapy, cognitive distortions represent the lenses out of which we view the world and filter our version of reality. In light of recent developments among some therapists, dichotomous (either/or) thinking has emerged as a professional hazard. I recently attended a national mental health conference. I was intrigued as presenters and colleagues alike made comments that presented a distorted perspective regarding some significant behavioral health issues. As M.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

The Magical Beliefs of Childhood

As children, we think we have the magical powers to change all that is wrong with our world. We need to believe that we can control problems in order to survive emotionally. For example, we may have parents who are not emotionally healthy. They may lack the capacity to be nurturing, supportive ...

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

THE COURAGE TO STEP OUTSIDE THE BUBBLE

Courage may be defined by those who live outside the bubble as opposed to those who live in it. I like to compare stepping out of the bubble to "wading out into the water." When one wades, they don't thrust themselves in, but slowly move deeper into the flow of things. They wait until they ...

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

When the Landscape of Loss Lingers

Within the period of three months, I lost three loved ones. Two of them died three days apart. Although I knew the end was eminent as I processed each situation, my knowledge and anticipation did not soothe me - it only served to bring me closer to the inevitability of my own mortality. Some say that God will never burden us with more that we can endure - those words seem like idle chatter - it was all too much to bear. I braced myself for the predictability and shock of my pain and sought to manage its effects. There has been no single road that has brought me solace.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

The Search for Adulthood: Grieving the Past and Embracing the Present

Learning to process and accept our past is a necessary step in one’s search for adulthood. Instead, people often choose neurotic suffering as a way of coping with painful memories. Neurotic suffering consists of coping mechanisms that put a salve over our wounds. Rather than confront one's painful past, adults will convert their grief into physical symptoms, and mask their losses through over-activity, intellectualization, avoidance, self-blame and projected anger. Neurotic sufferers ignore the stop signs, transcending their grief as if it weren't there.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

How to Respond to Tragedy

Rabbi Harold Kushner, the author of When Bad Things Happen to Good People, wrote about his response to personal tragedy. His son Aaron had premature aging, and eventually died from this disease. The pain from the Rabbi’s loss provoked a crisis of faith. Kushner wrote his book for those "who have been hurt by life," to assist them in finding a faith that provides reasonable answers to aid them in coping with their suffering.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

From Alcoholic Enmeshment to Rational Recovery

Todd came to see me at the encouragement of his mother. He "talked the right talk" about leaving his drugs and alcohol behind, although he had a long track record of failed attempts. Todd had been in and out of residential treatment programs without success. This young man looked to me and rational recovery as his last chance to live a lifestyle free of the ravages of addiction. I pushed Todd to explain to me, in every conceivable manner, how "this time" things would be different from all of his other failed attempts at sobriety.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Hooked Again! How to Break the Cycle of Relationship Addiction

Dana kept getting hooked in a relationship that was going nowhere. He came for counseling because he understood the self-defeating nature of his association with Kim. What he didn’t comprehend was how to break a convoluted connection that had a tight grip on his life. Dana confided that Kim would steal his prescription medication, exploit him for money, “guilt” him for not caretaking for her kids, and abusively berate and belittle him.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Life Through the Eyes of the Abuser

I define an abuser as one who uses the power of words or physical prowess as a means of manipulating and controlling others. Generally, the perpetrator chooses to forego any interventions such as counseling or psychiatric assistance. However, he/she may grudgingly consent to couples counseling when a partner provides an ultimatum. The abuser may be mandated by the court to seek anger management treatment and will attend reluctantly. The abuser generally has minimal insight into the significance of his problem.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

The Courage to Confront

One of the most significant underlying assumptions that many people internalize is, “I must avoid conflict at all costs; if I let others know what I think and feel, I might get disappointed and hurt.” However, “sweeping things under the rug” tends to eventually magnify unresolved interactions ...

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Cognitive Therapy and Weight-loss

Weight-loss is about majoring in the majors; it’s not about how you “butter your bread.” Often, people can be obsessive with weight-loss behavior. Weight-loss and weight maintenance can become a ritualistic, compulsive cycle. Charlie Whitfield, author and addictions expert calls the pattern ...

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
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By James KrehbielRecently published1 topic

Gay Identity and Authenticity

Many years ago, when I worked in education, I spent my summers directing outdoor park district activities for kids. The children would come from the neighborhood to play various games. One year I recall a teenage boy coming to the park with a desire to talk with me. He would attend a youth ...Many years ago, when I worked in education, I spent my summers directing outdoor park district activities for kids. The children would come from the neighborhood to play various games. One year I recall a teenage boy coming to the park with a desire to talk with me.

Primary topic: Therapy and Counseling
Therapy and Counseling
3,523 views
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