Articles
Browse every published article connected to Julie Simon, with exact attribution and full-archive search.
Articles
Browse every published article connected to Julie Simon, or search within this exact expert archive.
I often hear from my overeating clients that they wish they could get motivated to take better care of themselves. They ask me “why is it that I can’t motivate myself to eat better and exercise consistently? It shouldn’t be this difficult!” While the answer will vary from person to person, one thing that I notice across the board is the lack of an inner nourishing voice.
We’ve all heard it said that you can’t love anyone else until you love yourself. And although we know there’s truth to this old adage, most of us persist in looking for love outside of ourselves, often in all the wrong places. In one of my emotional eating groups this week, we discussed the concept of worthiness. I asked the group members if they felt worthy of self-love. All said they did not and each gave a detailed list of the reasons they felt they were not worthy. The list included things like: • I don’t have a college degree • I procrastinate • I haven’t paid off my debtr
It seems we are constantly trying to “get back on track” with something in our lives. We may be trying to get back to healthy eating, working out, de-cluttering, dating or work on some project we’ve dropped. And if we’ve really fallen behind, the disappointment and overwhelmed feeling can lead to a sense of failure, low motivation and paralysis.
Perhaps you've just gone through a rough patch in your life, or a very busy, stressful time and you've been overeating. Maybe your life, in general, feels like one big rough patch! You've gained some weight and you're trying to figure out how to lose it. Often, the quickest way to feel some control over your eating is to go on a diet. And when you're feeling out of control with your eating, all you can think about, when you're not overeating, is gaining back some control. Intuitively, it seems to make sense to cut back your intake in order to lose weight.
I bet you didn’t know that today is International No Diet Day. Well it is, and its observed annually on May 6th. It’s a day dedicated to raise awareness regarding the dangers in dieting and to celebrate body acceptance and body shape diversity.
Have you ever thought about how powerful your thoughts are and how quickly they can alter your mood? Truthfully, how often does a thought or series of thoughts ruin a perfectly good day for you? How often do you grab something to eat to calm or soothe yourself because of overwhelming, anxious or depressive thoughts? For most overeaters, the answer is quite often.
M. Scott Peck, MD, author of The Road Less Traveled,defines delaying gratification as “a process of scheduling the pain and pleasure of life in such a way as to enhance the pleasure by meeting and experiencing the pain first and getting it over with.”
In one of my overeating support groups this week, we were discussing the notion of "living in this moment." So often, when we aren't satisified with our bodies, we put our lives on hold. We tell ourselves that we're not applying for that new position, going back to school, volunteering, beginning dating, visiting the doctor or taking that new exercise class because we need to lose some weight first. The fantasy is that when we lose the weight, we will feel much better about ourselves and feel motivated to move forward.
Ever notice how hungry you feel when you don’t get enough sleep? Did you know that when we are sleep-deprived we eat more because we are actually hungrier? Yes, it’s true. Chronic sleep loss disrupts the body’s endocrine system by triggering increased insulin resistance and a disruption of appetite regulating hormones. Lack of sleep leads to a rise in ghrelin, the hormone that turns on hunger and a restriction in leptin, the hormone that makes you feel full. And since we are awake longer hours and are often sedentary in that extra waking time we consume more calories than we burn.
Thanksgiving is a time when most of us overeat. It's just what we do on this holiday, right? We eat until we're stuffed, and then when we have a little room opening up again in the old digestive tract, we fill it back up immediately. Hours later, we do it all over again. It's okay--we're giving thanks for the abundance of food on our tables and family and friends in our home.
If you're like most of the people that attend my seminars, workshops and classes on Emotional Eating, you've tried all kinds of diets, fasts and exercise regimens to take off the weight. Perhaps you've even tried pills, shots and surgery, all to no avail. You've lost weight many times but always seem to gain it back. You may already be suffering from health conditions, like diabetes and hypertension, related to your weight.
Does it feel like you’re living your life, day-to-day, with many of your needs unmet? Do you think this may have something to do with your overeating? If so, you’re not alone. Many overeaters, frustrated by years of unmet needs, find themselves regularly “using” food for emotional comfort, pleasure, soothing and distraction.
Chronic loneliness is a symptom and signal that you are disconnected from one or more of the three main sources of soul nourishment and sustenance: Self, Others and Spirituality. Some level of a positive connection to all three sources is essential for good emotional and physical health. In Part I of this article, I addressed Self-connection and shared with you a few steps you can take for improving it. In this section, I’ll discuss social and spiritual connection.
You certainly don’t need me to tell you to reduce stress. We all feel the effects of it regularly, from tension in our bodies to chronic headaches and illnesses. Stress in small doses can actually be useful. The stress you feel before a big exam may just be the motivation you need to increase your study time. Chronic job dissatisfaction may be the needed stressor to change jobs or go back to school. Too much stress though and we become imbalanced.
You may be sensing that some deeper longing or hunger within you is fueling your emotional eating. How do you know if your emotional eating represents a yearning for spiritual connection and nourishment? In Part I of this article, I suggested that spiritual depletion may be experienced as a restlessness or sense of unease, discontent or dissatisfaction with life, even at times when life seems relatively fulfilling.
At a seminar I gave recently on emotional eating, Cyndie, an attractive, well-dressed woman in her late forties came up to me and shared: “Even though I’m obviously overweight, I don’t think that I’m an emotional eater because I don’t eat at all when I’m sad or depressed. In fact, I can’t eat at those times.
Did you make any New Year’s resolutions this year about losing weight, getting in shape or stopping your emotional eating? If your like most Americans, you made one or more resolutions along those lines. And now, almost two weeks into the new year, you may be wondering where all those good intentions have gone.
Just as a wholesome meal nourishes our body, spirituality nourishes our soul. The spiritual component of well-being involves a search for meaning, serenity and joy that goes beyond our day-to-day conce s. You may be sensing that some deeper longing or hunger within you is fueling your emotional eating. Perhaps the concept of spiritual depletion resonates with you. You’re longing for more of something in life, even if you seem to have everything you once desired.
The glycemic index (GI) is a ranking of carbohydrates on a scale from 0 to 100 according to the extent to which they raise blood sugar levels after ingestion. Different carbohydrate-containing foods (sugars and starches) vary in their effect on blood sugar levels.
If you have been overweight for some time, you’ve probably tried many diets and are unclear as to how to lose the weight and keep it off without feeling hungry or deprived. There seems to always be debate and controversy surrounding the issue of diet. Which is the correct eating plan? Should you follow a high protein or low to moderate protein eating plan? Are carbohydrates okay to eat or should you restrict them? How much fat should you eat and what types? Is it okay to eat animal products, including dairy and eggs or should you cut them out and follow a vegetarian eating plan?
I have always had a love-affair with flour products, the doughier the better. Especially bread, the staff of life, right? Feed me anything made from wheat, like pasta, tortillas, scones, pretzels, crackers, cookies, croutons, and even licorice, and I’m in heaven. I feel immediate bliss. Well, at least my brain does. My body, on the other hand, well, that’s a different story. My nose gets stuffy, my head starts to get foggy within twenty-four hours, I wake up with bags under my eyes and my digestion feels off. So much for bliss!
Most of us don’t like to spend much time thinking about our losses and disappointments or painful childhood experiences. Yet, without much effort, they are brought to the forefront of our minds when something in our environment triggers thoughts of them. We see a happy couple and think ”Oh, yeah, I had a loving relationship with Jack, until he cheated on me.” We see a pregnant woman and are reminded that our clock ticked out and we missed the chance to have a child. Or we see a chubby child on a playground and remember the shame and criticism we experienced as an overweight child.
When the adult voices of our childhood are primarily warm, kind, encouraging, hopeful, validating, soothing and nurturing, we begin to develop a supportive voice within that can restore us to emotional balance when needed. As we mature into adulthood, this supportive voice becomes the voice of what I call our Inner Nurturer, our main source of validation, approval and reassurance.
I recently saw the play Ruined at the Geffen Theatre here in Los Angeles. It was an extremely moving and poignant story of the sexual and emotional abuse of women in the war-tor Congo. In this fictional story, some of the female Congolese refugees were "lucky" enough to find work and shelter in a brothel, rather than being further abused and battered in refugee camps or worse outside the camps. Many women had no one to turn to as their family members were brutally beaten, recruited for battle and even murdered.
The Random House College Dictionary defines hope as "the feeling that what is desired is also possible or that events may turn out for the best."
Have you ever thought about the purpose of your emotions? If you're like most people, you don't think much about emotions (yours or anyone elses) and you just move through them, hoping to experience more of the pleasant, energizing ones and steer clear of the deflating ones. When unpleasant emotions such as loneliness, hurt, disappointment or rejection surface, perhaps you try to distract yourself with food, alcohol, drugs, shopping, television, internet surfing, texting, reading, drama, sex, gambling, complaining, gossiping, etc.
It makes me crazy when I hear supposed weight loss experts preach that the road to weight loss begins and ends with calorie counting, daily weigh-ins and intense workout regimens. This kind of advice couldn't be farther from the truth and, in fact, it encourages us not to listen to the wisdom of our bodies.
Nothing feels better than waking up and looking forward to the day. Life feels worth living. We feel a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction because our life has purpose and feels meaningful. And even better if we feel inspired and passionate about what we're doing. We can feel purpose and meaning from many types of activities, including those that: are routine and provide order, satisfaction, comfort and balance to our lives--ea ing a living, household chores, running errands, shopping and preparing food and exercisingr
Do you find that you sometimes grab food (and eat even though you're not hungry) because you're angry at someone or about something? Or maybe because you're resenting some situation and feeling powerless to change it? You're mad or frustrated at these times and you certainly need something. In the moment, the food tastes good, calms you down and seems to take the pain away. But not really, and not for long.
For many of us, our parents and grandparents got much more physical activity than we get today. They shoveled snow, raked leaves, chopped wood, scrubbed floors, hand-washed garments, hand-mowed lawns, washed and waxed cars and walked miles per day. And for our earliest of ancestors, physical activity was a natural way of life. Roaming and working the land, gathering food and water, cutting firewood and securing shelter brought with it plenty of physical exertion. Our bodies are meant for movement.r
Are you consuming sweets daily? Do you add a sweetener to your daily bowl of cereal or cup of coffee or tea? Do you hunt for sweets at particular times of the day? If so, perhaps you feel powerless over your sweet cravings. If you’re like the average American who consumes 22 teaspoons of sugar daily, you very well may suffer from sugar addiction. Sugar is hidden in places you wouldn’t expect–it’s added to sauces, ketchup, soups, pickles, processed foods, drinks, health bars and more.
For many emotional eaters, the holiday season’s over indulgences begin with Halloween. The sheer volume of candy and delectable treats lining supermarket and drugstore shelves and home pantries is in itself downright spooky! And to add insult to injury, candy is being handed out every where you turn.Candy manufacturers seem to be oblivious to the obesity epidemic as they dream up new ways to combine sugar, fat and salt into small, miniature packets of ecstasy.
There is always much debate surrounding the issue of diet and among the experts, there is still quite a bit of disagreement. Are starchy carbohydrates like potatoes and corn okay to eat or should we limit them? Should we follow high-protein or low-to-moderate protein eating plans? Is it wise to eat foods of animal origin like meat, fish and dairy products or stick to plant-based foods like beans and lentils? How much fat should we eat and what types? What’s the best source of Omega-3’s, plant or animal?
My client Alexis (name-changed), a forty-four year old web designer, has been single her entire life. Without partner or child, she often feels invisible at social gatherings filled with couples and families. Her parents passed away in the last few years and as an only child without much extended family, she often feels a painful, overwhelming and at times paralyzing sense of loneliness. She “uses” food regularly to comfort and soothe the loneliness. A few times per week she has a large binge, generally when she feels depressed and anxious.
Of course you want to end your emotional eating. Yesterday, thank you. And while you feel motivated to give it the boot, somehow, somewhere you lose hold of your motivation most days and find yourself grabbing those cookies or that bag of chips or going for seconds. Perhaps you’ve convinced yourself that you’re weak-willed, undisciplined or just plain lazy.
At this time of year, many of my clients come in complaining of the shorter, darker days. Understandably so. It’s not just that the Summer has ended and the longer, lazy days are behind us. With this particular season change, those who suffer from mild to moderate mood disorders (especially depressive and bipolar) can all of a sudden find themselves feeling irritable and blue due to brain chemistry changes brought on by inadequate bright light. And if you struggle with emotional eating, the lowered brain chemicals can send you right to the refrigerator.
We all have our favorite foods. For me, freshly baked bread and scones top the list. And for some of us, once we start eating these foods, we can’t stop. It’s as if they’re calling to us. Before we know it, we’ve eaten the whole carton of ice cream, or polished off the entire bag of cookies. Even though we may overeat other foods, with these particular foods we feel compulsive and addicted. We’ve learned it’s best, if we can, to keep these foods out of the house.
After spending Saturday afte oon with a close friend, Jackie came home and baked a batch of chocolate chip cookies. The time spent with her friend Carol did not feel nourishing. The two dishes of ice cream and the plate of hot, fresh baked cookies did. Just baking the cookies felt more nourishing than spending time with Carol. Jackie knew that an afte oon with Carol meant listening to Carol’s long-winded stories about her job and ex-husband and poor listening of anything Jackie might share.
Janet approached me at the end of a seminar I was giving on emotional eating. She was in a state of desperation. In the last six months, she had gained twenty-five pounds and she was afraid she would gain more weight. She was sure her eating had an emotional component to it but was unsure of what to do to curb it. Her overeating was out of control and she could not bring herself to go on another diet.
Do you experience strong cravings for modern “drug” foods artificially concentrated in fat, sugar and salt? Foods like cookies, ice cream, chocolate, pastries, chips and french fries trigger the release of powerful “feel good” chemicals in the brain. Do you feel the need for stimulants like coffee, tea and soda? Stimulants trigger the release of energizing brain chemicals that help keep you alert and focused for longer periods of time.
We all procrastinate to some extent. There are only so many hours in the day and some tasks are just plain more onerous than others. Sometimes we procrastinate because we feel overwhelmed by everything we need to get done and we’re having trouble getting started. Other times, we feel unmotivated or tired and can’t get going. But no matter what the reason, if we want to successfully manage our lives, we must get a handle on our procrastination.