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Browse every published article connected to Keith Bray, with exact attribution and full-archive search.
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Browse every published article connected to Keith Bray, or search within this exact expert archive.
As a part of each day, I start with the “Serenity Prayer” to get a focus for the day. This has become an ingrained daily habit, but as can happen, sometimes we don’t pay attention to things we do so frequently. Today, from Hazelden, I received a great reminder, and it was ...
-living a life with new behavior in play!! So here we are, at the end of the page, and oh what a challenge. We’ve gone through all this work. We’ve had a “spiritual awakening as a result of THESE steps” and now we have to live the life? So what are these principles ...
Self Esteem Continuedr To me, self esteem is the most important possession a human being can have. We were born innocent, and the lowering of self esteem occurred through life experiences and over time. They key point, we were born with self esteem and it still exists within all of us, but with many, it is driven deep into the subconscious and must be “relocated”. Please read a quote from an “Idea Engineer” piece written by my friend and mentor Dr. Randin Brons:r
DOES IT STILL PLAY FORWARD? The biggest limiting factor in many lives today is the past, plain and simple. In the “co-creative process of life recovery” that I deeply believe in, a huge part of the coached journey is taking a very hard and detailed look at the past and fully getting things that are buried within exte alized. In my journey, I found for me, the biggest limitations that were preventing me from having the abundant life I deserved were limitations that were ingrained in me when I was young.r
SPIRITUAL GROWTH (a part of life recovery) An addiction driven bottom as evidenced by the dramatic decay to my closest personal relationships caused me to seek a dramatic change in the way I lived. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and was empty inside. There are questions on my web site (www.hopeserenity.ca) that helped me to realise I really had a problem. Although my journey started through marriage counselling and an addiction expert, I have found that most of the clients I work with are just like me- OK on the outside; lacking self-love and self-confidence on the inside.
Personal Powe "We are no longer puppets being manipulated by outside powerful forces; we become the powerful force ourselves." -- Leo Buscagli In making dramatic change in our life, is there really not just one thing we are seeking? Personal Power? Ther came a time in my life that I realised I ...
For the last 14 plus years I have been on a journey. I had hit a wall in life, in particular the life I was living inside myself. The outside world may have thought things were OK. I had a home, 2 cars, the bills were paid and my consulting company was doing fine from a financial ...
Always interesting to see what thoughts run through my head as I try to shut down my conscious thinking and spend quiet time in the morning. About fifteen years ago I sat in a treatment centre, Homewood, in Guelph, Ontario. I had been alcohol and drug free for about 3 months, and this did allow ...
I must admit that I missed A New Earth and Eckhart Tolle on web cast last night. I don’t miss Oprah, even though she did a good job. The things that I found in A New Earth, particularly as they apply to addiction recovery, life coaching and transformation, and awakening spiritually are ...
For some reason, finding balance is a theme that has resonated deep within this week, and I’m not sure why. The past 2 weeks have seen our local 12 step community bury 2 members. Both too young, both at the time of death back using their substance of choice. In listening to comments, both ...
THE SECRET ABOUT SECRETS "Nothing makes us so lonely as our secrets. ~ Paul Tou ier ~ Paul Tou ier is arguably the world’s most spiritual physician. A Swiss doctor, his practise has impacted people world wide. If a renowned person like Dr. Tou ier appreciates the power of secrets; the huge negative impact they have on out life, why do we so often insist on keeping secrets. The secret about secrets is that they can destroy your happiness and peace of mind. An amusing thing about secrets; often all around you know what you think is the best kept secret in town.
Each year I like to run through the 12 steps as written in the book Alcoholics Anonymous. These steps were an adaptation of many works before them, and are a universal truth for all people who want to enjoy good mental Hygiene and an abundant life. They have been adopted by some 150 self-help ...
Learning to be aware of who we are and why a tremendous part of a recovery of life journey is. To do this, there is nothing better than a thorough working of the 4th step of the 12 steps. Going forward, we must make sure we stay in contact with “self” in an honest fashion each and every day. We ...
SITTING IN JUDGEMENT No judgmentr Everything in life holds both a blessing and a curse. We deny this when we label the events of our lives as either good or bad. The following old Zen story illustrates this lesson most effectively. A farmer had a horse but one day, the horse ran away and so the farmer and his son had to plow their fields themselves. Their neighbors said, "Oh, what bad luck that your horse ran away!" But the farmer replied, "Bad luck, good luck, who knows?"
Do You Understand Coaching and The Benefits To You? - A review for me too, and why I know it’s my life purpose. Man, life has been busy and with the different holidays, a little confused over the last few weeks. Days go by, and I wonder where time goes, and sometimes I am guilty of losing ...
When I started by own personal journey to recover a life I really wanted, and a life free from addictions, I longed for serenity. I felt the squirrels were constantly running lose in the cage I call my head. They gave me no peace. Today, they are still there at times, but on an ever increasing ...
HAD NO CHOICE! When I was being made as a person and if I had been able to pick my attributes, I would not have chosen addictions and the effects of addictions, to be part of my life. That being said, addictions and abuse did impact on my life. This not very unique. About 10% of the ...
CHANGE THROUGH COACHING What I said never changed anybody; what they understood did.rn--Paul. P. To often in my role as a life coach, potential sponsor or mentor, I run across people who think I can change them. Craziness as the above quote states. The only person I can change is I, and this is a journey that has been work in progress for many years, and continues. For those who are looking for the answers they have within in nearly all aspects of their life, a coach or mentor can have them find it within. Many really do need a guide.
In a search to get a life I wanted, I began a journey. There were a number of things out of whack when the journey started. My wife had moved to an apartment leaving me in the home with our late teen kids, the kids kept their distance, the dog kept his also, my company was under performing, ...
Reality Check Last night, in talking with a fellow who I work with as a guide and mentor, I was faced with a reality check. It was a reminder, and a mini-awakening. Seated in the room with me was a friend of long standing, a doctor, who through abuse of substance and things that can go with it, ...
"Character isn't inherited. One builds it daily by the way one thinks and acts, thought by thought, action by action. If one lets fear or hate or anger take possession of the mind, they become self-forged chains." -- Helen Douglas How do you feel about anger, in yourself and in others? How do you deal with it? Anger is powerful energy. If we are afraid of this energy, we may attempt to deny or hide it.
Resentments can kill As we look at making amends, I was reminded again today about resentments. If I’m ever going to return to my old ways of dealing with the less pleasant side of life, it will likely be due to a resentment that I allow to remain unresolved. If my head is an apartment ...
Fortunate are the people whose roots are deep. --Agnes Meyer Co-Creative Life Recovery is a program of action and change. It has a spiritual (not religious) component as part of a holistic approach to getting the life YOU want. It is a process that is taught and requires commitment and work. It ...
Do You Have Any Idea Where You’re Going??/Life Directio The above question can be found as part of a collage of questions on a bill board in Dallas. They are questions from God. Upon seeing this, it made me reflect. There was a time that I had no idea of where I was going. Then as they ...
MORE-THAT FIRST STEP (forgiveness) As usual, my coaching mentor, Dr. Randin Brons has hit a very good topic with this week's Idea Engineer. Recently I did a blog on that first step that sparked very good response. Response indicates that it caused some thought, and I love to do that internally and spark it in others. Randin talks about a first step to forgiveness, and his words are in keeping with I try to live and coach others in.
Do you believe in yourself? "We cannot rise higher than our thought of ourselves." -- Orison Swett Marden Each week I receive an idea generator from my coaching mentor, Dr. Randin Brons. Seldom does Randin send something that does not provoke thought within me and usually it takes me back to where my head was at when I sought help to begin a journey to a different life. I was challenged to change, and change I did through direction. The question posed is only six words.
We need to listen to one another. --Chaim Poto How basic is this statement. How often do I forget it? It is a good reminder to me. How often do I get so caught up in my own world I hear what you’re saying without hearing? Can others relate? Listening is an important skill to cultivate. We ...
Do You Understand Detachment? I’m off at 6 in the morning for golf, so an early blog! For years, I have heard about detachment, often loving detachment. As the child of an alcoholic who went on to be a practicing addict in several areas, it is not a term I understood, particularly with ...
I constantly talk about coaching. Yes, this is in part because it is what I am professionally. But more importantly, it is because what coaching is and what it can bring to a clients life is not clearly understood. To those in self-help programs, coaching IS NOT sponsorship. The essence of ...
SABOTAGING SELF? How are you sabotaging yourself? "If you play it safe in life you've decided that you don't want to grow any more." -- Shirley Hufstedler How are you sabotaging you’re potential for change? We unconsciously use defense mechanisms to shield us from situations we perceive to be scary or painful. A part of you may want to grow and change, but another part may be resisting because change always moves you into new territory in your thinking and emotions.
NO GAIN WITHOUT PAIN Man, those words flowed from the lips of my old football coach Mr. Fleming many years ago. I still remember them well. Back then, you knew exactly when the pain would end (right after practice) and after playing a while, you got smart and learned you in deed could make gain without pain. Suffering, something that comes out of pain is something over which we have choice!! Suffering is a journey which has an end.rn--Matthew Foxr From Hazelden: "Pain is part of life. To live a spiritual life, we need a way to understand the suffering we sometimes endure.
Thought to Ponder . . .Never mistake motion for action. I read the book, sat on the sidelines at dances, talked the talk but didn’t get off my duff to actually dance. I dreamed I was mister dancing king, I fantasized what it would feel like, but when it came time to dance, reality was much ...
Humor-Age and Wisdom When doing my journal, I can get very serious. For those that really know me, humor has been a huge part of my recovery and journey, and is evident in most of the places I frequent. My higher power certainly finds ways to make sure I don’t take life too ...
Frequently I am reminded of what asset humility is. Frequently, when I think of “humility” I think of “humiliation”. My actions were responsible for humiliation to both myself and others I care about, and humiliation is not something I want! I am slowly starting to learn ...
THE FACE in the MIRROR On of the greatest compliments I have ever had from a client is that in our relationship, I was a great mirror for him. The mirror is an inexpensive tool all those seeking improved self esteem have at their disposal. It is a tool I often make a primary one in working with others. Why? Read on from a great article just published in his “Idea Engineer” by my mentor and friend, Dr. Randin Brons. The face in the mirror
SIMPLE LOGIC (The God Thing) You must wait and listen for the sound of the genuine that is within you. When you hear it, that will be your voice and the Voice of God. - Howard Thurman, American author, civil rights leader, and theologian (1899-1981) One of the great things with what I spend a lot of time at is that I hear a lot from others.
Have YOU Got Personal Strength?(God Thing) I ask this question for a reason. I am very interested in hearing honest and open answers from other. I am particularly interested in hearing from those who can respond without giving away a particular religious bias. For many years I have known that strength to change and to do the right thing consistently came from a source other than me.
In looking to professionally certify in a field I had been actively engaged in for years, I did a thorough search of coaching certification bodies and key individuals who were core members of the body. I was lead to the Certified Coaching Alliance, and had the good fortune of studying and ...
I like others, can be sensitive to what others say, and what I perceive they think, about me? Can anyone relate? I have a very deep faith that the higher power in my life exists within (as well as outside) me. As I go through my journey, and with the beliefs I have, I must be mindful that ...
In working with others to help them find the life they desire, it is critical that the client look into themselves and understand what they really want, what are meaningful goals for them. How do you approach that? Why is knowing the soul's desires so important? Many people go through life ...
Upon reflection, the biggest stumbling block to get a journey started to a life I am happy with was seven little letters. HONESTY. Over many years I had lied to myself and others, I had been less the honest in dealings with others, and had created a Disneyland in my head which had become a ...
Can You Relate? You are the hero of your life. This statement is the foundation behind my journey and a new life (now 14 years and counting) and the true fundamental principal that drives my coaching practice. YOU MUST BE THE HERO OF YOUR OWN LIFE. Coaching can help you find that hero! Each ...
A simple life is something I sought, and continue to seek. I love this article written by my coaching professor (literally), and think many of you will enjoy it too. As you would expect, it is in keeping with what we coach at Hope & Serenity-Coached To Success. Living Life the Simple Waynby ...
MORE ON ANGER Today, I had the pleasure of reading an exert from a book called “In God’s Care” by Karen Casey. What a great reminder about the power of anger. How many people do you run into in your own life that give off vibes that make you feel like there is a volcano present and just about ready to explode? Ever feel that way yourself? Anger was made a part of us for a reason. Dealing with it, for many, is an acquired skill. “Anger dwells only in the bosom of fools.rn--Albert Einstein
How to Let Bygones Be Bygones In working with others, I coach clients and sponsees to find tools and answers to issues that prevent them from having the abundant life they want. Things that prevent us from living the life we want and can live are common. Living in the past and collecting new garbage frequently is one of those issues. Deep down you know that there is simply nothing you can do to change the past.
The Journey-Building Self-Esteem My life is not perfect. I make a lot of mistakes. Sometimes, I stumble and fall. I am a work in progress. And when I remember that simple fact, I am better for the experience. It's easy to start on a path of change and get so busy doing what we need to do that ...
You Are Special and Unique As I do my coaching thing, there is one thing that is a mainstay. Each of us is special and unique. Each of us has talents, and each of us is capable of setting goals and achieving them. I am a recovered person from addictions who is constantly recovering. This ...
Bankrupt of Faith? Ok Mr. Webster, your on! In this period we live in we all understand bankrupt, but what can you tell us about FAITH? On page 338 of this very thick editio I have, you state about FAITH:""trust, confidence; complete acceptance of a truth which cannot be demonstrated or ...
Prayer and Meditation. MEDITATION? --not just something bearded guys do on Asian mountains As I went through the steps, this meditation thing might have been the item I misunderstood most. I had been exposed to prayer since I was a little guy. I am surprised in my coaching, when clients and I ...
It is true for all of us, there are times when S..T happens. It is how we respond to it that counts. I love to play golf. The golf course is such a window on life and an insight into the people who play the game. Spend four hours plus with a seemingly intelligent and balanced human being, let them put on a "Tiger Woods Casual" outfit (Tiger wears shorts when not playing tour events), put them in a beautiful setting and arm them with a club(s), little stationary ball and an objective to get the club(s) to direct the ball into a 4 inch hole with the least swings possible! WOW!