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Browse every published article connected to Melanie McGhee, with exact attribution and full-archive search.
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Browse every published article connected to Melanie McGhee, or search within this exact expert archive.
“Come out of the circle of time, and into the circle of love.” ~ Rumi As this month draws to a close, I’m sitting cozy in my office, three large dogs sacked out on the floor around me, while sheets of ice fall from the sky. This is by no means a typical winter day in east Tennessee. I’m finishing up the final touches on my “plan” for the year — all the while knowing that God is laughing.
I think that it's possible to cultivate a life of balance and peace? Do you? Seriously, do you? As a young mother, I knew that to be the kind of mom I wanted to be, I needed to take time for myself --- to meditate, to take care of my body, and reflect on my life. As an older mother, and so much more, the same is still true. I still need to take care of me. No one else is going to do that, it's entirely up to me. Having learned this early on, I bravely took up the mantle and make time for self care.
Your state of being is at the heart of how you experience yourself in life. It informs your perspective and your choices. It is your responsibility to protect and restore your state. Yet, when your state is jangled by the challenges of life, you get thrown into a variety of very human reactions — anger, sad, frustrated, scared or even wild, over the moon joy. These reactions can be like a filter for a camera lens that distorts the perspective a bit. You cannot get a clear read on a situation through a distorted lens. These distortions color your view and disrupt your state.
Gather ye rosebuds while ye may” is perhaps my favorite line of Robert Herrick’s poem, To Virgins, to Make Much of Time. Remember this poem? Maybe you’ve never heard it. Maybe you have and you’ve forgotten it.r
“What the hell; you are what you are, and self honesty occupies a definite and vital part in the ever-growing process to become a real human being and not a plastic one.” ~Bruce Lee
I happen to enjoy foggy days every once in a while. There’s a sense of the world turning inward, veiling itself so that only the most immediate can be seen. It’s a different perspective than my usual wish to stretch the eye as far as it can see to find out what’s over the next horizon. In the last few days, when the weather has been more rain and fog than sun, I’ve been thinking about the play of Consciousness --- well the real truth is I spend a good bit of my time thinking about the play of Consciousness.
Thich Nhat Hanh a contemporary Buddhist monk, writes with great elegance of the joy to be found in bringing our awareness to the present moment. He encourages us to be so completely immersed in the task at hand that it becomes to us the most important thing in our life.
Another yoga rock star, John Friend, has fallen, see this NY TImes Article. The unfortunate truth about people in power is that they sometimes abuse that power. Initially, these abuses of power are not typically grand. They are small betrayals that can lead up to big abuses if left unchecked. And we, as students and teachers are all vulnerable when we ignore those small betrayals, when we trust our teachers more than ourselves.
The yogi who is established in a steady posture easily becomes immersed in the ocean of the heart.rn ~ Shiva Sutra 3.16 As I reflect on this sutra, what is most compelling to me is the phrase “ocean of the heart.” As we all know, the ocean can be still and smooth as a mirror reflecting the thousands of tiny diamond lights of the sun. Or, it can be swirling with tumultuous waves reflecting a sky of darkened clouds. In the same way, the heart can be calm and serene or it can flutter with anger and anxiety.r
Recently, several of the yoga coaches I’ve trained were talking about how their class and client numbers are down. I shared a few tips with them about how to bring those numbers back up coming from a dharmic place of service. If that’s also been a challenge for you, this might help. I invite you to come into this inquiry from a heart felt place of service. That’s a good place to start.
The desire to know and recognize God, Truth, to experience that sweet space of Oneness is thought by some philosophers to be the root of all desire, the one desire. It may be that the desire disguises itself, showing up as a wish for a new car, or a particular job. Perhaps it shows up as some wanting for a girlfriend, a boyfriend, a relationship. However it comes to us, there is desire.
Anger generally has an outward directed energy. Someone in your life does something that does not meet your expectations or standards and you get mad. Or they don’t do something they said they would do and you get mad. Or they fail you or someone you care about and you get mad.
Liberation. It’s a word that often gets tossed out as the goal of yoga or the goal of meditation. Liberation. Though it sounds enchanting and is delightful on the tongue, it can seem so unattainable and so intimidating that some turn away from liberation as a real goal, or don’t give it much thought. You go to a yoga class, enjoy the practice and leave behind the real promise and goal of yoga. Maybe you believe that you don’t have it in you to do what you think is required. Or maybe, you think that even if you tried, liberation is probably not yours, not in this lifetime.
I will be travelling to Europe with my father in a few weeks. We both love to travel and it will be a trip that revisits places very dear to both of us. My dad is now 82 and traveling together is a precious and, like everything else, time-limited. These sorts of events get me thinking about a lot of different things but the prospect of this trip has got me thinking about one question in particular, what is the most loving act?
We each have the power to cultivate sustainable personal peace, build greater confidence and create fulfilling relationships. It’s a jou ey that can begin with intention and a willingness to love YOU, that much. Love yourself as if you are worthy of the greatest gifts life can offer. From my point of view, what greater gifts are there but a heart full of peace and fulfilling relationships?
Listening to the news this morning, I found myself feeling both saddened and angry at some minister I don't even know. He intends to burn the Quran, despite General Petreus' conce that such action will put U.S. troops in danger, despite Secretary Clinton's admonitions, despite the fact that one of the foundations of our country is religious freedom. Where to start? Of course, the only place to start is my primary area of influence, myself.
I recently met with a client who has long held a belief system about how others should behave in particular circumstances. As I listened to her confront her own assumptions, I was struck by the courage and humility it takes to really challenge a belief or a “should.”
We human beings are dynamic creatures and our relationships are vibrant expressions of that dynamism. But problems can often arise, especially in long term relationships, when we fall into the habit of thinking we know – thinking we know what our partner thinks, will say, or will do in a given situation. We turn our mates and even ourselves into static, one-dimensional images instead of allowing the full range of our potential to be expressed in each moment.
Goal setting is huge in our culture. We are a future and accomplishment oriented society and many of us live only to see the next day’s task completed. But what happens when something gets in the way? How do you react when an obstacle is placed in your path to your goal? Do you throw up your hands? Wait? Study? Laugh? Give up completely?
I went to see my daughters for an all too brief visit not long ago. This trip landed smack dab in the middle of several stressors that aren't part of my usual routines; the car was having trouble, house repairs from storm damage were underway and some critters that were supposed to live outside were making their homes in my home. I was ready for a little break from all the doing and chaos.r
The sun streamed through the late southern summer afte oon in golden rays. And, there I stood in front of my grandmother’s mirror. It seemed huge and somehow magical to me. This was not the first time I stood in front of that mirror. My grandmother often placed me in front of that mirror and told me that it was magic. I just had to look long enough to spot the magic. Whenever I was upset about something or I did something wrong, she would stand me in front of that mirror and say, “You just stand there and look at yourself until you see God looking back. Then come talk to me.”r
This time of year, many of us in the U.S. turn towards the practice of thanks giving –giving thanks. For me, this comes down to a very simple yet fruitful practice, mindfulness. Being mindfully thankful for the simplest gifts of life coupled with sense awareness not only gifts me with the Presence in the present moment, but with a very tangible interconnected thankfulness. Slowing down and using my senses to be present for as many moments as I can, brings me to a heightened awareness of the simple gifts of life for which I’m thankful.
I was recently asked by a friend of mine, Ramona Rice of DeStress Express to share my thoughts about beauty. What a great contemplation! In this day and age with so much focus on exte al beauty, I have loved thinking about what I find beautiful and when I’ve seen beauty. For me, beauty boils down to one quality, ease of being.
In my last blog I wrote about my plans to travel with my father. By now, we have launched ourselves into the trip and I am in Turkey attempting to remember a language I spoke about 4 decades ago. The point of last week’s post was acceptance. Accepting yourself and others for who they are and how that is a most deeply loving act. This time, I want to focus on the balancing act that comes with acceptance in a relationship; the balance between accepting a person just as they are and not losing yourself or your own needs in the process.
Think of the qualities you associate with a warrior. I think of ferocity of determination, one pointedness in attention, and definite strength. Now think of the yogic quality of ahimsa. Ahimsa is one of the yamas (restraints) in Patanjali’s sutras. It is usually translated as nonviolence or non-harming. It means that we won’t hurt other people, animals, or plants. On the outside, it seems contradictory to pursue nonviolence with a warrior mindset. Nonetheless, I don’t believe it is possible to do it otherwise.r
Most of us have routines. We do this, then we do that. I think routines are great containers for our lives. They provide a space in which to explore and live life fully. However, if the routine is not serving our highest interests, then perhaps its time to re-evaluate your routine and create a stronger container. http://www.mindysand.com My daily routine looks like this: I awaken, sit for meditation, stretch, eat and go to work. Throughout my work day which consists of seeing clients, skyping or phoning distance clients and time at my computer.
I recently had a conversation about vulnerability that has stayed with me. On one hand, it’s clear that a willingness to be vulnerable, to share what’s true for you, deepens intimacy. On the other hand, being vulnerable in the wrong circumstances or at the wrong time can leave you feeling exposed and even more vulnerable. If you are willing to be vulnerable under the right circumstances, you might find yourself feeling closer to the person or people with whom you shared yours
I’m not one to worry much about what other people think. Nonetheless, a week or so ago I found myself feeling unsettled. At first I could not figure out what had me feeling unsettled. After a little intrapsychic digging around, I found the culprit. I felt off kilter because of a mistake I made and I didn’t know the direct impact my mistake had on someone I care about, a client. I sent her a bill that was way off. It wasn’t the mistake that had robbed me of my general peacefu