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Browse every published article connected to Melissa Heisler, with exact attribution and full-archive search.
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Browse every published article connected to Melissa Heisler, or search within this exact expert archive.
Neil Findlay says he is just, “An ordinary person out there doing some stuff.” But he is so much more than that. Both Neil and his wife have dedicated some of their working years and now their “retirement” to helping children around the world. They are both an inspiration for what we can all accomplish. Neil Findlayr Neil Findlayr
Holidays are the best time of the year filled with parties, celebrations, gifts, food, family, and friends. Or are they?
Lately I have been experiencing a ground swell of desire for a new way to be and live. I expect to see this from my clients, however I am seeing it in places and people I would not expect. Arianna Huffington shares her thoughts about redefining success in her new book, Thrive: The Third Metric to Redefining Success and Creating a Life of Well-Being, Wisdom and Wonder. Instead of focusing solely on money and power she calls us to look to a third metric centered on the quality of our lives.
It happens to each one of us at one time or another. We become stuck. We enter a state of lethargy. Whether it involves our work or our home life, there are just days (and unfortunately sometimes weeks and months) where we feel stuck. We don’t seem to have the energy to move forward. We feel the need to get things done but can’t find a grain of momentum to make it happen. After a while we know we have to do something, yet we sit on the couch like an immobile brick. Stuck.
Diane Beaulieu, Entrée Kitchen owner and B.I.G. pod leader, asks, “When you have that feeling of there just aren’t enough hours in the day, where do you suggest one starts to relieve the stress?” Great questio Diane!
Stress awareness month always confused me. Aren’t we always hyperaware of how stressed we are? What we may not realize is how stress affects us. The Price of Stress When we are stressed our limbic brain takes over, shutting down all body systems which do not help us fight or flee danger. Our digestive, reproductive and immune systems are turned off momentarily to move all our power and energy to our muscles to run or defend ourselves. Once the immediate danger is over, our systems revert back to normal functioning.
Margie was the best hostess. She greeted everyone at the door. She passed appetizers and offered drinks. Margie ensured that everyone had a good time and that absolutely everything was perfect. The problem was - this was not Margie’s party. She was a guest at the party like everyone else and yet she acted as if she owned the place. Margie is a control freak. She needs to be in charge. She needs to be in control. I used to be like Margie.
For the past five years, I have been earnestly working on writing my first solo book. The concept originally started with musings on my walk to my old corporate job. Then I wrote a few essays and ideas. None seemed to take shape. After leaving corporate America, I knew it was the time to make it happen. I would go away for a few days on our boat and write standing in our cabin for hours and hours each day. In an amazingly short period of time, I had a completed manuscript. And it wasn’t very good.
Is there something you are afraid of? Is there something you are afraid to face? Dale Spencer had to face his fears, in order to recreate his life. Dale was leading the life of an average college student when at the age of 20 an unforeseen injury changed his life forever. Left paralyzed, Dale had to adapt to new ways of doing everyday tasks, getting around, interacting with people, finishing college and entering the workforce. He shares of he needed to come to terms with his dependence on others and how his injury changed the path of his life.
During a recent small business event the question was asked, “How many of the businesses present have busing plans?” Only 25% of the businesses there had plans. It was shocking that in this economy businesses were not strategizing on how to grow their business. To grow a business it is important to have a business plan that outlines what the company’s goals are and how they are going to reach those goals. A company can not survive, let alone grow, by sitting around expecting customers to show up.
At first I didn’t know why I felt so poorly. I thought that it might just be due to my new job filled with travel, deadlines, and an ever-changing focus. My stress-levels increased while my exercise decreased. My eating habits became poor as processed, prepackaged convenience foods and the perceived need for caffeine became the norm. Even when I tried to eat better, the weight still kept coming on and my digestive system was erratic. I began to have health issues with seemingly no source.
This July I am offering a course for small businesses. The Business Strategy 101 course is based off the key premise that every good company has a plan.
Stress awareness month always confused me. Aren’t we always hyperaware of how stressed we are? What we may not realize is how stress affects us. The Price of Stress When we are stressed our limbic brain takes over, shutting down all body systems which do not help us fight or flee danger. Our digestive, reproductive and immune systems are turned off momentarily to move all our power and energy to our muscles to run or defend ourselves. Once the immediate danger is over, our systems revert back to normal functioning.
Four ways to trust your doctor and be the project manager of your health: Know Your Bodyr
A young mother experiences a difficult birth and illness of her first child and then a difficult choice when her own illness affects her next pregnancy. Learn how writing became a saving grace and sense of hope during this difficult time.
“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” – Mark Twain What was the last thing that made you angry? The bad driver cutting you off? Your kids not picking up their toys? You were passed over for a promotion? How long did you stay angry? An hour? A day? A week? According to Harvard-trained and published neuroanatomist, Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, your anger should only last for ninety seconds.
The concept of a Type A personality has not been around for long. It was actually identified in the 1950s by two cardiologists, Drs. Meyer Friedman and Ray Rosenman, who were studying coronary heart disease. They found a link between personality types and heart disease. According to their research, they identified three types of behaviors: • Type A, which they labeled as competitive, ambitious, impatient, aggressive, and fast-talking; • Type B, which is more relaxed and non-competitive, and • Type C, which is hardworking, but becomes apathetic when faced with stress.
“Now that I am trying to change, I don’t like who I am.” At some point, many of my clients say this or something similar. When they finally see a new way to be, but are not yet capable of acting that way, they begin to attack themselves. judges gavel“I am a horrible person.” “Being this way is bad.” “It is wrong to act like this.” These thoughts are natural, but not helpful. There are some very simple ways to begin accepting who you are so you can move into who you want to be. See the Truth
Recently a client admitted to falling back into an old undesirable habit. Ashley had once again become a tyrant at home. She was obsessed with the cleanliness of her house. She worried about getting things done on time. She stopped interacting with her family. The only time she spoke to them was when she was barking out an order or reprimanding when something was not done correctly or on time. Ashley was obsessed with her to-do list. She was frantic to complete each item. She was becoming very stressed by all she wanted to complete.
In our fast-paced, multi-tasking, on-the-go-deadline driven work, we are often caught up in the act of “Doing.” We move from task to task on our to-do list. We rush from work to class to home. We keep pushing ourselves to do more and do it better. from type a to type me: how to stop doing life and start living itBut what is the cost? Do you have hobbies? Do you have passions? Or have you lost who you are to all of the things you are doing outside of yourself? Do you sleep well at night? Are you fit? Do you feel good in your body? What is your blood pressure?
If you had millions of dollars, what would you do? Buy an expensive house and car? How about a used van and park it by the ocean? That is exactly what Major League pitcher Daniel Norris did. Instead of spending his multimillion dollar contract to live up to the appearance of a celebrity ball player, this 21-year-old pitcher chose a simpler life. In a segment on the Today Show Daniel Norris said, “When I can simplify outside of the fair and foul lines, that’s so much less to think about off the field and all my focus is put onto the baseball field.”r
We all complain about stress, but what is it really. National Geographic did a wonderful report on what stress is by not only looking at humans and our environment, but also through baboons and science. In watching specific tribes of baboons who ate the same food, lived in the same area, and experienced the same natural threats, scientists found it was not environment but social interaction and social rank that caused stress. The baboons that experienced stress and the physical symptoms of stress were those on the bottom of the food chain.
Like the Scarecrow, Lion, and Tin Man in the Wizard of Oz I sought an expert to provide me with what I already held. Over a decade in corporate America led this Type A into physical distress. I was fatigued and irritable. My muscles were tight and painful. My digestion and reproductive systems were broken causing intense issues and discomfort. I was a wreck.
I learned from a sweet little movie called About Time a very powerful message about to find happiness in our lives. The story is about a family with the ability to travel back in time. On the son’s 21st birthday, he is told about the power and how to use it. For the first half of the movie, this young man uses his ability to have do-overs. Can you remember your teens and early twenties? Are there words you wish you hadn’t said? Are there sentiments you wish you had? Did you have an awkward moment you wish to erase? Were their opportunities you would have seized?
Workers seem more and more stressed every day. Technology has created expectation of an immediate response 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Short-term thinking and planning based on the focus of quarterly stock reports has increased the sense of importance for every project. We feel everything is an urgent priority needing instant attention. The “doing more with less” mentality has increased the amount of our responsibilities and what is expected of us. This has created a culture of inefficient multi-tasking.r
When the behaviors of a Type A are out of control, we can take responsibility for situations and outcomes, for the feelings and experience or others, and for absolutely everything around us. We think everything is our responsibility, and thus, within our control to affect. We fear if we don’t take care of everything needing to get done, there will be horrible consequences.
Another powerful concept Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor provided in her TEDx Talk is the concept that we are feeling creatures who think. We are not thinking people who feel, yet this is what our society believes and values – which is at the heart of many of our issues.
I like to think I am fearless, and in many ways I am. But in some ways I am not. One of the most noticeable ways is in regards to my business. I fear not having enough income to pay my bills. I fear I will not be able to make the business what I want it to be. I fear that I made a mistake making my passion and purpose my business. The problem is when I listen to my fears and believe them I make bad choices. If I believe I won’t have sufficient income, I feel it is hopeless therefore I am unmotivated to attract new clients or attend networking events.
I like to think I was a control freak, but I guess I still am. Back in the old day I was a micromanager, taking responsibility for every aspect of a project even if it wasn’t mine. I would stay awake at night worrying about outcome. I would plan and scheme what else I could do to make the project work. Fortunately, for the most part, I have released much of those tendencies. My next challenge is releasing my focus on outcome for things that define success for me.
Empowerment means the power of choice. Empowerment is about courage. It is the belief that we are in control of our experience. Empowerment is not about labeling good or bad, but about actively choosing what makes us happy in each and every moment. The journey to empowerment and great health is not linear and there is no quick fix. The journey is cyclical. There is a progression. We make a commitment, we make progress, we overcome new challenges, and we repeat. Each time, we move inch by inch to a better and better life. Our purpose is to experience the good, the bad and the ugly.
Recently whenever I talk to a client or friend about their job I hear: I have lost the passion for my work. My co-worker undermined my project. It seems we only shuffle paper and no longer provide anything of true value. My boss took credit for my work. I have to work overtime again, without pay. There is too much work to do. I am completely overwhelmed. Once again, I had a nervous breakdown in my office.
Never in history have we had such comforts and ease of living. Our grocery store shelves are stocked and we can cook a meal in minutes. We can communicate with family and friends around the world instantaneously and face to face. Modern conveniences make our day to day life easy. Then why the heck are we so stressed? The reason is because of this technology, and our limbic brain. I have been preaching this a long time and recently spoke about it. Now newest research by Dr. Marc Schoen, psychologist and faculty member at UCLA’s Geffen School of Medicine, has proven it.