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There is no doubt that for many novice speakers, breathlessness is an annoying problem. It goes hand-in-hand with a voice that rises in pitch and a speed that goes faster and faster. None of these ‘qualities’ are beneficial in public speaking.
Have you ever considered what your lack of volume is saying about you? Possibly in days of old, a soft-spoken voice was considered feminine and endearing. Today, however, with the number of women in business, a voice lacking in ‘normal’ volume is not an endearing quality. Unfortunately, it says that you lack confidence in yourself. And, if you are a man, it says the same as well.
Is it possible to be composed when your heart is racing, your knees are shaking, and your stomach is in knots? Most definitely. When you look at the great speakers like Jack Canfield, Zig Ziglar, and Mark Victor Hansen, do you think they are not nervous? They are, but all you see is composure. Calm, reassuring, and confident, they address their audience just like they were having a conversation with you in your living room. They also talk to you – not at you – but directly to you, the individual in the seat, hanging on their every word.
One of the most common complaints I hear from women is that they sound like a child; and, they are tired of answering the phone and having the caller ask to speak to their mother. Does that sound familiar? If my first statement resonated with you, there is good news and even better news. The good news is that your ‘real’ or true sound is a voice inside of you that you do not know is in there. And that voice is richer, warmer, and much more mature-sounding than your habitual voice.
Have you ever considered what your body is saying when you are addressing an audience – even just talking in your living room or sitting at the kitchen table? Referred to as body language, non-verbal communication is expressed by the posture of your body, your gestures and even your face. The questio I would ask you is what your body language expresses when you speak? Does it match the emotion you are feeling? Or does it say something different? It is also possible that your body language is expressing no emotion, as well as your facial expression and your voice.
We are hearing it more and more each day. We hear it with politicians, ministers, professional speakers, coaches, trainers, singers, aerobics instructors, and even the guy next door. It is called vocal abuse and it results from unnecessary wear and tear on the vocal folds (cords).
In an article some months ago, I talked about the value of storytelling in public speaking and why a descriptive retelling of a story is much more interesting than a brief quip. Audiences love true stories especially if they involve you and have a good ending. They must be pertinent to your topic, however.
The other day a woman phoned me and her volume was so loud that I had to move the phone away from my ear. My immediate opinion of the caller was that she was overbearing. Her loud volume was making a statement about her that may or may not have been true.
While public speaking may seem like a war in which you are doing battle, it really isn’t. In truth, it is not that different from standing at your desk among a group of people and explaining to them how you successfully won a long sought-after account. It is not unlike sharing a story about a recent experience you had. And, it is certainly not unlike telling a joke to a group of friends at the water cooler.
I just received a phone call from a young man who asked if I was hiring. I am not hiring; however, were I looking for help with my business, this man would definitely not be on my list of candidates. He sounded like a wimp; and, while I did not use those exact words, I suggested that in his future cold calls, he should speak with confidence. Not aggressive by any means, but certainly not wimpy!
Many people gain tremendous emotional, spiritual and physical benefits from yoga. Its value is undeniable. I would like to posture a question to you. If you find the deep breathing advantageous in reducing your stress during yoga, why not make it a habit and do it all day long?
I am going to assume that your delivery skills are above average. You have addressed an audience on numerous occasions and you enjoy the challenge of public speaking. As strong as your presentation skills are, however, how good is the sound of your speaking voice – the one you hear on your answering machine, not the one you hear in your head? If you could improve that aspect of your delivery, would you be interested to know that there is hope for the voice that you may find embarrassing or even humiliating when you hear it on a recording?
The other day I spoke to 2 individuals with the exact same problem. They were pushing their voices from their throats. In both cases, I had to move the phone away from my ear because they were so loud that it hurt. If you are pushing hard from your throat when you talk, not only is it offensive to your listeners’ ears, but it also can do serious damage to your vocal folds (cords) and your throat. In fact, both were complaining about discomfort: they had sore throats and were not sick. This is known as vocal abuse.
Nothing is more embarrassing for a speaker than to be plagued with a voice that quivers, shakes, or skips an octave when standing at the lecte or the head of the conference table. It is a problem for many people and can easily be eliminated by taking control of your nervousness and speaking from your chest. And your reaction to those words is probably to question how you can possibly speak from your chest when everyone knows that you talk from your voice box, your throat, your mouth, and, in some cases, your nose.
Ah, the handshake. The handshake that is the 2nd or 3rd thing in which others will judge you. First in line is your visual image. What follows is often a handshake, your name, or both, as you introduce yourself. Have you ever considered the importance of your handshake and the image it presents? If your handshake is too strong, it may tell others that you are aggressive. Too weak and it says that you are a wimp. Neither handshake is appropriate. What you should be offering is a firm grip that neither overpowers the other person nor lays limp in their hand.
Most people are unaware that voice training is something they can do for their personal and professional development. No, it is not just actors and politicians who study with a voice coach. More and more people are discovering that they are not stuck with the voice they hear on their answering machines or voicemail.
One of the difficulties many people have is to the ability to increase their volume without hurting their throat or their listeners’ ears. The right way to do this is known as projection and is only possible if you are powering your voice from your chest cavity.
If you are interested in discovering your real speaking voice but do not want to learn the proper breathing techniques in order to do so, then do not read any further. Some people provide various exercises to improve the voice you presently have; and, there are a few others who will show you the voice you don’t know you have. And, that can be very exciting.
I have spent the last few months questioning why my customers, as well as the subscribers to my newsletters, consist of 75% men and only 25% women. If you look at the picture objectively, we women often sound like ill-tuned violins. (And, it is certainly possible that this is one of the reasons men don’t always listen to us!)
Have you ever sat in an auditorium, hall, church, or theater and listened to the coughing, sniffling, shuffling of papers and overall restlessness of those in the audience during a rather dull presentation or speech? It happens and it happens when the speaker is not very dynamic. Too often, the person delivering a speech or presentation is frozen in one spot with an ashen complexion and a death grip on the lectern. If this scenario is typical of you, then rest assured your audience will do the moving for you!
Do you know what an elevator speech is? An elevator speech is an introduction about your business that you can encapsulate in 30 seconds or less. The idea for this type of speech is based on the average length of time one spends in an elevator. The value of the elevator speech is not just when traveling from one floor to another however. Elevator speeches can be used in more situations than you may think which is why it is to your benefit to have one ready at a moment’s notice.
Yes, I want you nervous for your upcoming speech or presentation because nervousness is good. I do not want your audience to see it however. Great public speakers are nervous. As many times as they have spoken, as many times as they have delivered the same presentation over and over, their adrenaline is in high gear when they enter the stage.
If others continually ask you to repeat yourself, what do you think that says about you? If you are striving to achieve success in your career, do you think your soft-spoken voice might be jeopardizing your goals? Have you ever considered that your lack of volume is possibly what could be holding you back? I would never advocate for a loud voice. Admittedly, I would prefer that someone spoke too softly than too loudly because a loud voice can be offensive; however, that is not a justification for being too soft in volume.
For many people, just the thought of public speaking is enough to cause extreme panic. When you consider that it is man’s greatest fear, this is not surprising. While you may regard the act of standing in front of an audience and delivering a speech or presentation as a war that you will lose, might I suggest that you regard the process as a battle instead? In order to win the war, you must first win the battle.
No matter how great your message or how powerful your delivery, have you ever considered the vehicle or instrument that is transporting your words? What does the sound of your speaking voice say about you? If you are over 21 and sound like a teen or preteen, do you know that you image you are projecting will not be one of maturity or confidence? On the other hand, having a voice that is reminiscent of your grandmother is most definitely giving the wrong impression of your age, especially if your grandmother is still alive!
If you are a mumbler, the chances are you a man. I know; I know. While generalizing may not be politically correct, from my vast experience and background, I have found that mumbling is more common among men – especially tall men; whereas, women tend to get lockjaw. The problem for those of us who have to listen to a mumbler is that we cannot understand you. And, if we don’t understand you, there are only so many times that we will ask you to repeat yourself before taking over the conversation. If you expect to be heard, you must break this habit.
For many of us who have spent years in business, our anecdotes are many and varied. There is no doubt that experience is not only the best teacher, but affords us many stories and anecdotes throughout our business careers. What does the novice speaker do, however, when his/her experience is minimal?
If you are plagued by a great deal of stress on a daily basis, do you know what it is doing to your speaking voice? You are probably aware that it is affecting your sleep, your diet, your mental health, your physical health and your overall well-being. But what do you think it is doing to your voice? Possibly you notice a strangled sound or tightness in your jaw that becomes more apparent as the day wears on.
Too often, novice speakers do not appreciate or make use of the pause because they are too intent on getting their speech or presentation over with as quickly as possible. The result for the audience is a barrage of constant verbiage which is exhausting for both the listeners and the speaker. Handled correctly, the pause is exactly the same in public speaking as it is in normal conversation. Everyone (or most everyone) pauses in conversation. We pause to breathe. We pause to gather our thoughts. Some of us even pause for effect.
While it is definitely easier to speak to female audiences, you can have as much success with male audiences if you understand the differences between the two. In addition, knowing the makeup of the particular male audience you are addressing will be to your advantage.
If you want a New Year’s Resolution that can improve your life, both professionally and personally, you might consider voice training. I am sure that you are questioning how this is possible. What is fascinating about the techniques for discovering your ‘real’ voice is that those techniques will directly influence a number of other aspects of your life. From better sleep to greater endurance, from less stress to lower blood pressure, voice training which prioritizes diaphragmatic breathing will do just that. It is truly a marvel how this works.
If you find others recoiling when you speak, it could be that you talk too loudly. While those who speak too softly far outnumber those who are too loud, the difficulty with the loud voice is that it is offensive to your listener’s ears. How loud is too loud? If you have been told that you are shouting or have been requested to speak more softly, then it would be a wise decision to learn how to decrease your volume. This would involve retraining your inner ear to know when you are speaking with too much volume.
In my last article, I discussed what you should be seeking if you are interested in improving your presentation skills. In this article, I have added 5 more tips if you are planning to attend a workshop that covers both voice improvement and public speaking skills. 1. Make sure the company will be recording you and also providing you a copy of your own materials upon completion of the workshop. Having a record of how you sounded before you started the course is vital for voice training and will be an excellent reference and reminder for you in the months and years to follow.
Dynamic speakers move and audiences do not. Less than dynamic speakers tend to stand, riveted to one spot which means that their audiences are moving. When that happens, you have lost them. We tend to think of public speaking as something in which we must stand behind a lectern. If you are delivering a formal speech, then you most likely will use the lectern, although even that does not mean you are locked into one place.
Vocal Abuse is the misuse of the voice which can lead (or already has led) to permanent damage to the vocal cords. Teachers, trainers, coaches, and politicians are the most likely candidates for vocal abuse. However, anyone who uses their voice heavily throughout the day can experience the symptoms: chronic sore throats, hoarseness, and even loss of voice. For the last several weeks, I’ve been working with 3 particular individuals who are all experiencing some form of vocal abuse.
In working with a group of young professionals some years ago, I was stunned to hear all the participants ending their sentences on the upswing as if they were asking a question. I had often heard this type of speech inflection at the business lunch during the personal introductions, but this was the first time I had heard it while someone was giving an actual presentation. And it wasn’t just one individual. All seven in the group did the same thing.
You work out every day. You eat the right foods. Your hair is in the latest style. Your clothes speak well of you. However, when you open your mouth to speak, what comes out is anything but what your visual image is saying. Women are attracted to a deep voice and if you have a high-pitched, nasal, whiny, wimpy sound, then you are not turning your prospect on…you are indeed turning her off.
Are you frustrated because others constantly ask you to repeat yourself? Especially because you think they should have heard or understood you the 1st time? If you frequently hear, “What did you say?” then maybe it is time for you to discover exactly why your message is not being received. There are only 3 possibilities for someone to ask you to say it again.
We all have one – a voice that has resonance and depth. It sounds more mature but not old. It is ageless. In fact, it will continue to improve as you age. Unfortunately, 99% of the population is unaware that they have a better voice inside; and, that same percentage is unaware that their ‘real’ voice will be a vast improvement over their habitual one.
If your speech is symptomatic of the Valley Girl sound, you need to break the habit. Unless you are at a bar, speaking in Valley Girl-Ese gives the wrong impression, especially to prospective employers. They are looking for professionalism. Inflecting the pitch of your voice up at the end of your sentences does not give the impression of maturity or professionalism.
The angst, the agony, the sleepless nights. The overwhelming dread that pervades your life knowing you are scheduled to speak, either for your business or personal life. It could be toasting the groom at your best friend’s wedding or giving the quarterly budget report for your company. It might be a 3-minute summary at your leads meeting or maybe you are introducing a speaker at your Rotary Club.
Recently, I had the opportunity of working with a group of young professionals in a corporate workshop on voice and presentation skills. Comprising six women and one man, the group was under 30 years of age except for one woman who was 32. Smart, savvy, outgoing and most able, this group took me by surprise when I heard them in normal conversation.
If nervousness is keeping you from making that ‘dreaded’ presentation, might I suggest a different approach to your thought process? Instead of focusing on your nerves or your fear, why not focus on your success? Whether you are scheduled to speak for your boss, for your own business, or for some other occasion, your inability to stand at the lecte could be jeopardizing your career. What is holding you back is exactly what could make your speech or presentation a success.