Articles

Articles by nancy travers

Browse every published article connected to nancy travers, with exact attribution and full-archive search.

articles: 136
shown per page: 50
search signals: Topic + expert

Articles

136 articles by nancy travers · showing 50

Browse every published article connected to nancy travers, or search within this exact expert archive.

By nancy traversRecently publishedTopic pending

Marriage’s Underwater Mines—Porn Addiction

A follow-up on my recent article on sex addiction. Pornography is not erotic literature, which can have social and artistic value. Serious moral issues pervade the porn industry, such as the exploitation of vulnerable women and the enticement of young people—mostly men, but an increasing number of women—into an unhealthy sex life that can interfere with normal sexual development—and a marriage.

Primary topic: Recently published

Recently published

1,696 views1/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

How Loving Couples Behave

Norman and Norma Burmah, at 102 and 99, have the longest marriage—82 years—on record in the United States. Imagine if they were unhappily married. What a long and dismal sentence that would be. While I don’t know how happily married they are, I do know what they and others do when they are in a happy relationship. Certain behavioral patterns are shared by happy couples, whether recently united or going for the longevity record. Friends

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

863 views2/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

How Do You Know When You’re Being Emotionally Manipulated?

Most people are empathetic, unless they have a personality disorder, and they understand that emotions are sacred. To be taken seriously. Most people agree that it’s morally unethical to toy with someone else’s emotions.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,371 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

How to Overcome a Co-dependent Relationship

Since co-dependent relationships are not healthy for you, why is it so hard to extricate yourself? Why is it so difficult to get out of a situation that is harmful to you? Well, we all hate change, even if that change may be for the better. And if you’ve been in a co-dependent relationship your whole life, it is all you know. It’s what you’re comfortable with.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,697 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

How a Therapist Can Help You and Your Partner

Effective couples therapy depends on a number of factors. Both partners must be willing to make a change. If one has already decided to give up and cannot reengage, then success is probably not possible. The key is to get to a therapist before your relationship has eroded too far. If one or both of you are just going through the motions to prove you’ve left no stone untu ed before you split, you can’t expect good results.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,247 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Six Essentials to Being a Gentleman

A gentleman is a chivalrous, courteous, honorable man, according to the dictionary. You may think gentlemen are people from the past, but thoughtfulness never goes out of style. Basically, a gentleman is considerate of others, and that’s something to which anyone of any age should aspire. Here are the top six essentials of a gentleman:

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,207 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

How to Work Through a Break Up

Breaking up is a difficult time in anyone’s life, especially if you’re the one being left behind. This is a time where you may feel shaken. You’re losing your routine, your security, and maybe even the person you felt was closest to you. It is easy to feel lost and confused about who you are and what you have.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,673 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Are You a Victim of an Emotional Manipulator?

Are you afraid of conflict with your significant other or friend? Do you make bad decisions to accommodate him? Do you tell little white lies to avoid problems? Do you blame yourself for his dissatisfaction? Do you rush to pamper him when he becomes irritated? Do you sacrifice and give, give, give—and still feel sad and lonely? Perhaps you are under the thumb of an expert at emotional manipulation.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,553 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Is Your Emotional Foundation Shaky?

Fortifying or rebuilding your foundation starts with assessing how solid or shaky it is

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,272 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Are You Close to Someone with Narcissist Personality Disorder?

When you are a close relative, partner or friend of a person who suffers from Narcissist Personality Disorder (NPD), you suffer too. People with NPD have an escalated sense of their superiority and importance in the world and a constant need for attention and admiration. They often have little regard for others’ feelings and may even exploit others to achieve their own goals. These traits can be detrimental to those who are close to the NPD sufferer. Causes of NPD

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,308 views5/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Talking to the One Who Makes You Mad

If you hate conflict, you could spend a long time stewing in your anger before you express it to the person who caused it. By then, your anger may have built to levels beyond reason. Or maybe you zipped off an e-mail, comforted by the fact that technology helped you avoid a face-to-face confrontation. But sometimes your relationships need that personal conversation to clear things up and move on to more enjoyable interaction. The trick is to do it without becoming so angry that you lash out and hurt the person you love.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,128 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Six Simple Steps to Rekindle Passion and Renew Sexual Energy

Many people feel that the first sign of a deteriorating relationship is a loss of passion and sexual energy. As a relationship matures, a couple may find that they do not have the same sexual energy as they did throughout their honeymoon phase of the relationship. However, dwindling passion does not mean that a relationship is over. Instead of calling it quits or seeking satisfaction outside of the relationship, couples should work to restore the passion in their relationship and renew their sexual energy.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

5,121 views3/5 (2)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

What to Tell Our Children When Our Hearts Break

When a terrible tragedy strikes, as it did recently in a Connecticut kindergarten classroom, our hearts break. We don’t know how to mend. If we are directly affected by the tragedy, then professional counseling is imperative. But we also need to pay attention to our feelings, however tenuous our connection to a traumatic event. Even if we have only seen reports of the terrible news in the media, how do we heal? How do we help our children to heal?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

953 views3/5 (2)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Why Do Men Cheat on Business Trips?

It is not uncommon for a woman to worry about what her husband is doing while he is away from the home, especially when he is away for extended periods of time. Pop culture has no qualms about depicting a cheating husband to create a strong, independent heroine. The media coverage of recent scandals certainly hasn't put anyone's minds at ease. With all that we hear on the radio and see on television and films, it seems that almost every man is ready to cheat, and many of them take advantage of business trips to engage in extramarital affairs.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

9,306 views1/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Anxious About Anxiety

If you have never suffered from excessive anxiety, then it may be difficult to empathize with someone who has. Anxious people may seem to be worried about nothing of substance, so it’s tempting to disregard the problem. But the fact is, anxiety—including post-traumatic stress disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder and panic disorder—is one of the most common disorders. About 40 millio American adults are affected per year. How do you deal with someone who seems anxious all the time?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,317 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Five ways to say :I Love You" When Words Aren't Enough

These tips are designed to build and grow a marriage or relationship – when it’s failing and you can’t seem to control it, Orange County marriage counseling may be a healthy option for you.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

3,551 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Do You Love an Alcoholic?

Alcohol abuse and alcoholism are so pervasive that about a third of Americans have someone close to them who has the problem. This means legions of people have relationships that are stressful at best, and damaging at worst. If your spouse is an alcoholic then alcoholism is bound to affect you as well. The Problem for Partners of Alcoholics

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,308 views5/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Listen Up (2013)

Ever heard the expression “Listen up?” Sometimes coaches say it when their team is in a huddle. They want everyone to pay particular attention to their message. Listen up. Lift your chin up; direct your gaze up into my eyes. Listen carefully and hear what I’m saying. Listen up. How often do you feel like your partner is not hearing what you’re saying? Or maybe your partner’s voice has become all too familiar to you and it’s become too easy to tune out. Maybe you do it unconsciously. The Listening Problem

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

2,364 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Five Thoughts to Stop Thinking and Start Being Happier

People are unhappy for all sorts of reasons, some of them easier to remedy than others. You may not even realize you’re unhappy, yet if you think about it, you are not living up to your happiness capacity. If you are in a rut of negative thinking that makes you unhappy, stop to think about what you can do to change the habits of your mind. For example:

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,273 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Good Manners in the Digital Age

The world has changed so fast that it’s hard to know how to behave these days. Old rules don’t apply and new ones haven’t been created yet. Suffice it to say consideration for the other guy is the key to good manners, and we don’t need Emily Post to tell us that. But when it comes to social media, it’s easy to push some pet peeve buttons even if you are generally a thoughtful person. Here are some things to consider:

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,277 views4/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Contempt: A Sign Your Marriage Is in Trouble

There are as many reasons for troubled marriages as there are people in them. Surely infidelity is a big one. One partner’s selfishness is another. Disrespect for your partner’s opinions and feelings will certainly damage a relationship, as will a lack of emotional intimacy, communication and affection. A need to get your own way through control, manipulation or abuse is devastating. The list goes on. But the number one sign your marriage is in trouble is contempt. Contempt: the feeling that a person is beneath consideration, worthless, or deserving scorn.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,110 views1.5/5 (2)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Who is SEXTing Anyway?

“SEXTing” is a term that gets thrown around a lot these days. With technology so readily available, it was only a matter of time until our sexuality made its way to our cell phones. SEXTing refers to anyone sending sexually explicit messages or racy photos to partners, peers, or the public; this trend originally referred to use of cell phone cameras and messaging, but now encompasses email and social media transmissions.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,184 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

What a Woman Needs to Know before Sleeping with a Man

If you keep making the same mistakes over and over again when in relationships with a man, Orange County counseling may help you figure out how to treat yourself better so you can hook a quality relationship. Sleeping with a man isn't always the event of the century, but very few women ever master the technique of 'casual sex'. In fact, most women expect to feel nothing after the fact, but that's simply not the case most of the time – especially if they like the man they slept with and see some potential relationship material when they stare at him in the morning before he wakes up.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

824 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Quotes to Help You Live Life to the Fullest

Admit it. It’s easier to slog along in life without great spikes of joy or great valleys of sorrow. It’s easier to follow the path of least resistance. But are you merely existing? Do you feel you could do more with your life? If so, it’s time to jolt out of your comfort zone. Here are a few quotes that will help you do it. “We must do that which we think we cannot.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,277 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Good Listening Means Good Relationships

Happy people make it a point to listen to others. They like to learn new things, take an interest in others and generally feel good when they listen. In the process of listening, they are also showing respect for others’ thoughts and ideas, and that, in turn, demonstrates their self-confidence. They are secure enough to let all sorts of ideas and opinions enter their lives—even those with which they disagree. They radiate positive energy.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,007 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Sex Addiction and Attachment Problems

The very words ‘sex addiction’ are controversial. It’s a term that some are not certain is a legitimate designation. But a Newsweek article (November 25, 2011) declared sex addiction a national epidemic, estimating about 9 millio Americans—or 3 to 5 percent of the population—suffer from compulsive sexual behavior. That means they masturbate compulsively, watch excessive pornography, practice exhibitionism or voyeurism, engage in frequent anonymous sex, pay for sex or to watch sex, or behave in sexually compulsive ways that cause shame.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,068 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

When Sleep Eludes You

Last week we talked about housekeeping tips to get you to sweet slumber every night. If you followed them, you’ve made your room dark and quiet, you’ve checked your mattress, you’ve banned the TV from your bedroom, watched your intake of caffeine and alcohol, regulated your routine—everything. And there you are, at 4 a.m., wide awake. What can you do when you’ve followed the rules and you still can’t sleep?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,900 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

When Narcissistic Behavior Becomes Narcissistic Personality Disorder

In Greek mythology, Narcissus was renowned for his beauty and was so proud that he sco ed those who loved him. Instead, he fell in love with his own reflection in a pool of water, and could not leave the image of himself. Finally, he died, unable to tear himself away. His fixation with himself was his undoing.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

875 views5/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

A Guide to Mindfulness Meditation

The promise of mindfulness meditation is that it can help you become more aware of who you are without the sting of judgment. Unlike some other forms of meditation, mindfulness meditation is not directed toward getting you to think differently. Its goal is to help you become aware of what is already true in the moment. To accept that truth without trying to change it. For people involved in therapy, mindfulness meditation can help them tolerate very strong emotions, and thus advance their healing.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,623 views5/5 (2)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

How to Deal with Passive-Aggressive People

The trouble with passive-aggression is that both the giver and the receiver often have no idea what’s really going on. In other words, the person who’s passive-aggressive (P-A) may know he hates conflict, may know he’s feeling a little angry and may know he’s covering it up. But he doesn’t register how rancorous he really feels. The person who’s the object of the P-A’s anger may never know what hit him because the rancor is well disguised. Consequently these incidents go largely unacknowledged for what they really are—hostility.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,465 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

What’s Sabotaging Your Good Intentions?

It’s the New Year, and time to make a new start with all your good intentions to have a productive, fulfilling, happy year. But sometimes it’s a struggle. We get sidetracked, bogged down. Before we know it, our good intentions have vanished into thin air. What hinders us?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,704 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

3 Ways to Put the Spark Back in Your Sex Life

Sex is a basic human need, but as your partner and you grow, you may evolve at different rates. The desire for sex becomes unbalanced in your relationship—one partner wants it more than the other. And over time, sex may become predictable and the excitement fades.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,638 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Verbal Abuse in Relationships: How to Recognize the Signs and to Figure out When it's Time to Go

If you are having trouble dealing with the negative feelings associated with leaving a spouse because of a verbally abusive relationship, Orange County marriage counseling can help you sort those out and find yourself again. Verbal abuse is one of the hardest kinds of abuse to recognize. Everyone gets loud sometimes, yells sometimes, says things they shouldn't say to people that they love – that doesn't necessarily mean that it's verbal abuse, and many problems that involve elevated yelling or angry comments can be resolved.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

672 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Happy Couples Communicate

You’d think it would go without saying that happy couples like each other. You have to like someone before you can love them. And happy couples love each other. They share a good laugh frequently and often. They pay attention to one another. They communicate.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,174 views2/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

So Your Spouse Is Cheating on You

You’ve seen all the signs. All the sudden he’s working out when you could barely get him to walk to the end of the driveway to pick up the newspaper. He seems emotionally and sexually withdrawn when he used to want sex all the time. He’s constantly on his computer or cell phone and he’s guarding his privacy on both. He’s angry about things that never used to bother him. And the classic: he’s working late a lot.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,208 views2/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Negative Body Image Affects Your Intimate Relationships

The way we see and value you ourselves has a huge impact on our actions, our quality of life, our happiness, and even our relationships with others. Body images is a simple term that describes how an individual views their body and appearance—whether that is “average,” “attractive,” or “bad.” Negative body image plagues many Americans, both male and female. Today’s society has a very strict image of beauty that is displayed in magazines, television and film.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

7,518 views5/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Four Reasons to Quiet Your Monkey Mind

With summer here, it’s time to relax. To let yourself daydream. To take time off from your usual frantic schedule. To free yourself from the rigors of daily life and quiet your mind. Lack of structure used to be a feature of summer vacation, but we seem to be increasingly programmed. Maybe it’s time to recapture some of that quiet time through meditation. It turns out it’s good for you. Why Meditate?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,342 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

So You’re Having an Affair

You didn’t mean for it to happen. It started so innocently, with just a flirty conversation. Then it escalated to an emotional attachment. He so gets you, and you talk into the wee hours, if only clandestinely on your cell. And you feel so wonderful you don’t want it to end.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

990 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

When a Loved One Commits Suicide

Robin Williams’ recent death left many of us, who didn’t even know him, feeling bereft. How could he, who was loved by millions, take his own life? How could his life have been so unbearable that he had to end it? And how do we cope with the aftermath?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,623 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Are You in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship?

Sticks and stones may break my bones, But names can never hurt me. This childhood ditty may be one reason some people are slow to understand that verbal or emotional abuse is as detrimental as it truly is. After all, words are not as bad as physical blows, are they? But consider this: Physical violence against you eventually heals, but insidious emotional abuse, often out of the sight of anyone else who can validate your feelings, can last a long time. If you: - are in emotional pain and a depression that seems to have settled permanently;

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,226 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

3 Sure-Fire Relationship Killers

When couples get married they never think they will be among those who get divorced. Yet a hefty percentage of marriages do end in divorce, so some of these people who can’t imagine divorce on their wedding day will certainly face that prospect eventually. Psychologists have identified behaviors that make failed marriages predictable. Here are some—criticism, nagging, and trying to change your partner.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,569 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

When ‘Sorry’ Is Not Enough

Apologies are an important component of repairing a relationship, but they only work if the apology is heartfelt. Saying “I’m sorry you feel that way,” or “I’m sorry you misunderstood,” may only exacerbate the problem and make your partner madder. For an apology to begin to work, it must be absolutely sincere. Even then, an apology alone may not be enough to put things back together and make the relationship right again.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

991 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Healthy Sexual Relationships

A healthy sexual relationship is an integral part of a fulfilling partnership, which is reason enough to make good sex a worthy pursuit. The trouble is, while sex often provides great pleasure, it can just as often provoke stress. Are you satisfying your partner? Are your sexual encounters frequent enough? Do they last long enough? There are all sorts of questions you can ask. But really only one is relevant: Are the needs of both partners being met?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,068 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Behavior Patterns Happy Couples Share

I’ve been talking the last couple of weeks about happy couples. Although everyone’s different, there are certain patterns that recur among those who have solid, happy relationships. They’re friends, they laugh together, they pay attention to one another, and they communicate well. What else?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,083 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Alcoholism and Alcohol Abuse

Did you grow up in a household where cocktail hour was a nightly affair? Do you cope with stress by having a glass of wine? Or two? Do your friends drink heavily?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,040 views5/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Great Expectations: Unattainable Standards Harm Your Life and Your Relationships

Everyone has expectations. In fact, everyone hopes that they can achieve the best in their endeavors. However, some of us take our expectations too far. Having goals and standards is healthy; they keep us motivated to achieve and pursue our dreams. High standards motivate us to do our best. Some people, “perfectionists,” can take high standards too far. A perfectionist is someone who has such high standards that they may be unattainable for most people.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

2,818 views5/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Recognizing Your Co-Dependency

Co-dependency used to be a word reserved for those in a relationship with alcoholics or other addicted people. But the term has been expanded to include people with lopsided relationships—people who are partners, parents, family or friends with dysfunctional people. Dysfunctions can include all sorts of addictions from drugs to sex, and emotional, physical and sexual abuse.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

987 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

The Quest For Perfection: Is The Grass Really Greener or Merely Shades of Grey?

Today’s society offers no shortage of sexual and erotic material that is easily accessible to interested consumers. More than ever, we are inundated with images, written words, and discussions of what sex is and what sex could be. Sexual fantasies exist in the minds of all of us, but finding avenues to transform fantasy into reality can represent a delicate and precarious journey for those fixated on perfection.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,188 views5/5 (1)

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Letting Go Can Be Good. You Can Quote Me!

A friend always takes herself out to lunch on her birthday. By herself. She’s been doing this since she was a young girl. It’s a good time to contemplate what you want for yourself in the year ahead. But a good life is not always about what you acquire. It can also be about what you shed. You might want to think about what you don’t want—what you want to let go of so you can live a happier life. Here are some ideas:

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,229 views

By nancy traversRecently published1 topic

Riding Out Relationship Cycles

Fashion goes in cycles. Palazzo pants, then skinny legs. Mini skirts, then below-the-knee. The economy goes in cycles, too—boom, bust and boom again. So why not relationships?

Primary topic: Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice

1,277 views

Back to top ↑