Articles
Browse every published article connected to William Cottringer, with exact attribution and full-archive search.
Articles
Browse every published article connected to William Cottringer, or search within this exact expert archive.
Why Is It So Hard To Talk About The Elephant In The Room? BynBill Cottringe n“Two cows were talking in a pasture. One says to the other, “Are you worried about catching mad cow disease?” “No” said the other, I am an elephant.” ~Bad joke. A work colleague of mine, Bob Bennett, is quick to ...
Exercise Your Thinking Muscles “Sometimes you must give up the good to get to the great. The key is knowing what to keep and what to discard from your mind.” ~The author.
DECODING CONFLICT By Bill Cottringer nnnn Organizations today are faced with inevitable conflicts in team-building that will require creative resolutions that may be just slightly outside the leader’s toolbox. Even the most experienced leaders have to approach each new conflict with ...
The least Applied Solution to Relationship Conflicts Worth ConsideringnBy Bill Cottringe n“The only way to mange the destructive affects of anger and hatred are to cultivate the positive antidotes of patience and tolerance.” ~The Dalai Lama. In any intensely close personal or work ...
WORDS ARE WICKED Byr Bill Cottringer “In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends,” ~Martin Luther King, Jr. For over 50-years now, I have worked in criminal justice as a law enforcement officer, prison warden and a security manager, and I can tell you without an ounce of uncertainty, that our criminal justice system is broken. It is broken because of the emotionally laden words we use which support and drive the whole system—in the wrong direction. Here are the big three words to re-evaluate with patience and careful thoughtfulness:r
A Baker’s Dozen Classic Ah-Ha Moments Byr Bill Cottringer “We often get the thinking-feeling-behavior sequence mixed up. It is important to understand that it is behaviors and actions, not thinking, that result in our feelings, which in turn often prompt problem behaviors.” ~The author.
Managing vs. Coaching byr Bill Cottringer “You must always be the apprentice, even when you become the master.”rn ~ Christopher Cumby.
Looking for Greener Pastures Byr Bill Cottringer “The grass on the other side of the fence isn’t always greener. Sometimes it is just a different shade of brown and other times it comes with unwanted weeds and underground pests. ~The Author. Having played fierce musical chairs for over 5 decades now with careers, jobs, relationships, living locations and even with politics, religions, and schools, I can attest to the truth of the opening quote. Here are just a few honest views of both sides of the fence: Big vs. Small
STAYING HAPPY IN HOPELESS SITUATIONS Byr Bill Cottringer “No situation is completely devoid of all hope; hope is always there waiting patiently for patience to see it.” ~The author. Staying reasonably happy in hopeless situations is certainly one of life’s greatest challenge. Hopeless, impossible situations can hit us at the beginning or ending of life or anywhere in between, usually without a whole lot of warning. Consider the likely unhappiness in these hopeless situations: • Being born with a serious disability.r
PRETZEL MANAGEMENT OF THE VICIOUS CIRCLE OF UNHAPPINESSnBy Bill Cottringe nn“Life probably gets annoyed at us for thinking too much. It’s like going to a great theatre production on Broadway or music concert at Carnegie Hall with virtual earphones, books, cell phones and DVD’s.” ~ The author.nn ...
ACCEPT ADVERSITY, BOUNCE BACK & GET GOING Byr Bill Cottringer “All the adversity I've had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me... You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.”rn~Walt Disney. Life is often riddled with problems, obstacles and challenges which make it seem like one big test. The test is how you approach these adversities to develop the character you need to overcome them and end up at the finish line. This is your true legacy that nobody can deny you but yourself.
The Best Way To Thrive Is To help Others Survive Byr Bill Cottringer “We do not live to think, but, on the contrary, we think in order that we may succeed in surviving.” ~Jose Ortega y Gasset. The best way to thrive is to help others survive…but first you have to master surviving yourself! In case you haven’t noticed, there is an ever widening gap between many of us who are just trying to survive and the few of us who are starting to thrive.
THE TWO HALVES OF LIFEnBy William Cottringer, Ph.D. “Most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson. From where I am standing do my looking today, there seems to be two distinct halves to my life. Of course I am interested in finding ...
The Dynamics of Dishonesty byr Bill Cottringer “Accuracy is the twin brother of honesty; inaccuracy, of dishonesty.” ~Nathaniel Hawthorne. One of the most important ingredients in any relationship is trust. Trust is enhanced by honesty, while dishonesty is a hungry termite that strips the foundation of trust. Understanding the dynamics of dishonesty can go a long way towards taming its impact on human relations and the quality of our lives. Below are the main interacting factors that drive dishonesty:
What Can You Do When You Feel Life Doesn’t Care About Your Pain And Suffering? By Bill Cottringe n“This is where you win the battle—in the playhouse of your mind.” ~Maxwell Maltz. Unfortunately, the short and truthful answer to the title question is not what you want to hear—nothing. ...
Managing Better Work Performance By Bill Cottringer “Compelling trust is the highest form of human motivation” ~Stephen Covey.
Finding Your Way Out of the Swamp When you Are Shoulder-Deep in Alligators Byr Bill Cottringer “No problem can stand the assault of sustained thinking.” ~Voltaire. Scene. Picture this: A Cold, foggy, and damp early morning when you find yourself under-dressed and shoulder-deep in a swamp full of hungry alligators.
Managing Towards The Simplicity Just On The Other Side Of Complexity Byr Bill Cottringer “I wouldn’t give a fig for the simplicity on this side of complexity, but I would give my life for the simplicity just on the other side of complexity.” ~Oliver Wendell Holmes.
“Success is what you get from using common sense; failure is what you get from using everything else.” ~The author. Success is built on a firm foundation of good old common sense (which unfortunately isn’t so common these days); failure follows the crumbling of a weak foundation built on the lack of common sense. Sometimes it takes seconds and sometimes years to spot the differences. Are you serious about building a strong foundation of common sense that will sustain long term success that lasts years?
TERRIBLE CHOICES Byr Bill Cottringer “We choose our joys and sorrows long before we experience them.” ~Kahlil Gibran. There are some terrible choices we seem to have to make through all ages. Consider the following very uncomfortable choices confronting us all at different times in our lives: • Youth: The choice of staying cool with the peer group and doing whatever that requires—even engaging in wrong or illegal behavior—and then suffering the dire consequences vs.
Welcome Back Kotter (Likeability)! Byr Bill Cottringer “Welcome back, Your dreams were your ticket out. Welcome back, To that same old place that you laughed about…”~John Sebastian, Lov’ Spoonful. One of the most popular TV programs of my generation was “Welcome Back Kotter.” I can still hear the theme song written by “Lovin’ Spoonful” playful songwriter and singer John Sebastian, clearly in my mind as the day I watched the first show. So what made this program so popular and successful?
BREAKING THE NEAR-IMPOSSIBLE CYCLE OF ADDICTION byr Bill Cottringer “In the course of history many more people have died for their drink and their dope than have died for their religion or their country.” ~Aldous Huxley. A drop dead handsome, smart young man gets a good education and marries a beautiful, wealthy wife, goes to Hollywood and starts partying with the in-crowd and then starts an irreversible, painfully slow downhill slide to his casket with drugs and alcohol greasing the way.
SHARING THE SECRET OF SINGLE-MINDEDNESSnby Bill Cottringe nn The most important gift a leader can share is the illusive secret of single-mindedness. No organization can flourish with consistent growth, abundant prosperity and genuine success without single-mindedness of purpose and effort. ...
THE UNNECESSARY SUFFERING PART OF NECESSARY SUFFERINGnBy Bill Cottringe n“Anything, anything would be better than this agony of mind, this creeping pain that gnaws and fumbles and caresses one and never hurts quite enough.” ~Jean Paul Sartre. Life involves a certain amount of painful, ...
Seven Sure Paths to Self-Actualization Byr Bill Cottringer “Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” ~Theodore Roosevelt.
Four Important “Yes, Buts…” About Success to Keep in MindnBy Bill Cottringe n“Success is often what is left when you empty your toolbox of the failed solutions that are past their opportunity, but hard to give up.” ~The author. Two very good cases have been made about our main purpose for ...
“Success is the progress we each make in our private, lifelong journey of learning, growing and improving into our best selves.” ~The author. There are currently as many “tests” to measure success as there are personal definitions of it or criteria for defining it. Where do you go to sort this all out and really know how successful you are? A good starting point is to ask the toughest question there is: What is your main purpose for being here?
Repairing Virtual Communication failuresr Byr Bill Cottringer “In a world that is constantly changing, it is to our advantage to learn how to adapt and enjoy something better.” ~Kenneth H. Blanchard. Live, face-to-face (f2f) communication has always been difficult, unfortunately with miscommunication being the norm. Now that we have quickly transitioned to a largely virtual world, good communication has become even more of a challenge. Below are a few useful tips to improve virtual communication. 1. Use Likeable Words.
Lessons From Early Team-Building Byr Bill Cottringer “The ratio of We’s to I’s is the best indicator of the development of a team. ~Lewis B. Ergen.
Two of my favorite words lately are alignment and purpose. When these two words are in sync with each other you can access unlimited success and abundance and all the positive feelings that come with those things. But when these two words are out of sync with each other, that is when you get ...
The Impacts of the Human Trafficking Violence Trauma Experience by Bill Cottringer I’m tired. I just want to go home. ~Anonymous survivor. Helping survivors get past the violence trauma of a human trafficking experience is a challenging effort. It requires an informed understanding of the total impact this horrid experience uniquely has on each different person. Below are the various impacts of loss that each survivor goes through to some degree or another, which need attention by human trafficking service providers in their trauma informed care model.
THE MOST IMPORTANT YES, BUT…IN ACHIEVING SUCCESS IN ANYTHINGnby Bill Cottringe n“One quality is worth more than four quantities.” ~The author. Although it may seem as though the quantity of your efforts are what lead to success at doing something your are trying, it is rather the quality of ...
Technology: The Ritalin Cure For ADHD Byr Bill Cottringer “For normal people, the artificial urgency created by today’s hyper-speed technology is a demon to be tamed; for people with ADHD, it turns out to be an angle in disguise just needing to fly itself into being tired.” ~The author.
How to keep a Job in Tough Times Byr William Cottringer, Ph.D. “The quickest way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” ~Oscar Wilde. In tough economic times, it is not a good thing to be unemployed. And if you are lucky enough to have a job, you don’t want to do anything to lose it by doing or not doing something under your control. In most states misconduct or quitting for no good cause will keep you from being eligible for unemployment benefits. And sometimes, you can even be proactive to avoid being laid off.
SEEING THE REAL ENEMY Byr Bill Cottringer It pays to know the enemy - not least because at some time you may have the opportunity to turn him into a friend. ~Margaret Thatcher. The real enemy is not a person, group, country, or thing that we can easily see and fight against, but rather a compelling, persistent, and invisible illusion behind the curtain, well out of sight. A pervasive conflict, which hides the real enemy from our awareness, is the conflict we all feel between “us” and the rest of life. This all begins at our birth into this world with our own unique identity.
Thinking Away the CrapnBy Bill Cottringe nn“Keep writing. Try to do a little bit every day, even if the result looks like crap. Getting from page four to page five is more important than spending three weeks getting page four perfect.” n~Alan Dean Foster. I am not going to apologize for ...
Redefining Success: Seven New Super-Sized Success Secrets Byr Bill Cottringer “Success is simple. Do what's right, the right way, at the right time.” ~A old H. Glasow.
After decades of both humorous and sad failure attempts to fix broken realities I didn’t like in my own and others’ lives, I think I have finally discovered a simple prescription that I wish I had known about years ago. Many needless broken bones, bleeding and bruises could have been ...
THE TRICKS OF POSITIVE THINKINGnBy Bill Cottringe n“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” ~Winston Churchill.nn n Gee, we have all heard enough about the power of positive thinking, right? You only get about 4 ...
Reality Repair Rx Book Outline By William Cottringer, Ph.D. nnn In writing books or articles it is always good to stop now and then to question the importance and value of your writing topics and what your truest intentions are. I made a door sign some time ago that reads, “Dr. Cottringer, ...
“Peace is not absence of conflict, it is the ability to handle conflict by peaceful means” ~Ronald Reagan.
The four Crucibles of Success Byr Bill Cottringer “The ‘luck’ of success is when your talents and efforts meet the right opportunity to apply them.” ~Anonymous.
25 Self-Development Truths You Can Take To The Bank Or I Don’t Know Anything BynBill Cottringer "The highest reward for a person's toil is not what they get for it, but what they become by it." ~John Ruskin. Here are 25 self-development truths I am certain of through firsthand experience ...
Relationship Facts That Get In The Way of Relating Byr Bill Cottringer “Relationships are the real test to find out if you are as good as you think you are.” ~The author.
IF YOU CAN’T KEEP AN OPEN MIND, ARE YOU SURE YOU HAVE ONE? BY Bill Cottringer “Being ignorant is not so much a shame, as being unwilling to learn.” ~Benjamin Franklin. Here are the few important realities in life that have held to be true long enough to be the exception to this rule: • The one thing that seems to be certain is change. • Life is basically a process of learning, growing and improving. • The one sure common denominator for success and happiness is adapting to change.
The Purpose of Relationships By Bill Cottringe n“Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing it is not fish they are after.” ~Henry David Thoreau. Lately, I seem to be more successful at accomplishing what I am trying to do when I remain mindful of my primary purpose in what I ...
“For those who believe, no proof is necessary. For those who don't believe, no proof is possible.” ~Stuart Chase. There is one huge belief that has a humongous influence on all others because it represents and touches everything else. This one belief that matters most is the one we each ...
Ten Sensible Problem-Solving Strategies From the Trenches by Bill Cottringer Life is a series of problem-solving opportunities. The problems you face will either defeat you or develop you depending on how you respond to them. ~Rick Warren.
GET READY TO RUMBLEnby William Cottringe nn There are plenty of dismal headlines in the business and public service news today. “Financial Meltdown,” “Profitability Plague” “Cooked Books,” and “Ethics Erosion” are common phrases today. Are these things just part of a bigger problem? nn ...
DIVORCE SURVIVAL KITnBy William Cottringer, Ph.D.nnn A pending divorce can be a scary and devastating experience for a married couple. For every divorcing person, the future is nothing but uncertainty, anxiety and confusion. Such an emotional state is not good for focusing on priorities or ...