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98 articles by Dr. Anne Brown · showing 50

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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Dos and Don’ts of Visitation From the Therapist! (by: Anne Brown PhD, CS)

"The best security blanket a child can have is parents who respect each other." ~ Jane Bauston Do treat your Children like Gold! Remember you just turned your children's life (and they didn't have a vote) upside down. They now have to decipher new rules, new logistics, probable logistical chaos until their stuff finally gets where it is suppose to be, emotional land mines, and they have just inherited all the things you divorced your "ex" about. Maybe you were able to shield your children from some of the "bad stuff" going on and now they have to figure things out on their own.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Who Is A Sociopath?

Who is a Sociopath? "Sociopaths/Psychopaths are fun, exciting, seductive, charismatic, impulsive, sexy, AND unfortunately, individuals diagnosed with an anti-social personality disorder." — Dr. Anne Brown What does this mean to you? After you have been drawn into their world, then you are going to find: 1. Sociopaths don’t keep agreements. 2. They have a disregard for the law and any rules. 3. Sociopaths lie, are deceitful, can use aliases for their own personal financial gains or pleasure. 4. They are not conce ed with their own or your safety.r

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

6 Tools for Resiliency in Recovery

Resiliency and Recovery have a nice ring. The two R’s! Having a backbone makes this process a lot easier. Resiliency is having the ability to adapt in the face of adversity. The more you know yourself, the greater your self-awareness, and the greater your backbone, the greater your chance for success in your recovery.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Divorce Support: A Curse or a Blessing? (by: Dr. Anne Brown, PhD, RN)

It really is up to you every day whether you see divorce support as a curse or a blessing! Whether you are the giver or the receiver, I recommend you reframe it as a blessing. Is this easy? Of course not! However, if you actually go through the trauma of getting divorced and you stay married through your anger that seems pretty self-destructive! Remember, "Letting someone live rent free in your head" has bigger costs than a monthly check.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Strong Minds Accept No Graciously

"What we fear doing most is usually what we most need to do." Tim Ferriss How did we become a society that cannot hear the word No? Why are we so sensitive to being told No? There is yes and there is No, there is night and day, dark and light, yin and yang, and on and on. So to be balanced and have strong minds we need to accept No in the same way we accept yes.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

The “Craziness” of People Pleasing and How Did We Get Here? - by Dr. Anne Brown

What is this phenomenon “I need to make everyone in the world like me or people-pleasing?” This is a tough concept because in one-way people-pleasers are nice to be around. If we look deeper we have to ask at what cost? People pleasing can affect both men and women. The history of women, however, is to be compliant and accommodating. Women have been taught, “Don’t rock the boat, and just agree.”

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Backbone Power | Newsletter Sign Up

SUBSCRIBE TO GET THE LATEST BLOG POSTS, NEWS, & MORE UPDATES FROM DR. ANNE BROWN. http://backbonepower.com/newsletter-signup Dr. Anne Brown, PhD, of Sausalito, Califo ia, formerly from Aspen, Colorado in her private practice has served as the trusted advocate and advisor to Influential Corporate leaders, Trial Atto eys, Athletes, Leaders, Physicians and their families, many whose connections extend well beyond the town of Aspen.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

NO is a Complete Sentence! - by Dr. Anne Brown

we introduced the importance of being able to say No. For the purpose of our discussion this week we are talking about people with equal status in the relationship. This does not include parent-child, teacher-student, or employer-employee. These relationships have different guidelines for dignity. The relationships we are talking about are people out in the world negotiating life. People chatting on the Internet, attending school, in social situations, in family relationships other than parent-child need to include the ability to say No in their quest for dignity.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

A Voice For Our Veterans

A Voice For Our Veteransr In honor of Veterans Day, we are going to begin to give a voice to our veterans in Part One. In Part Two we are going to offer insights on how we can be better friends, countrymen/women when our veterans return and actually when they are away as well.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Strong Leaders need Strong Minds!

(We all need Strong Minds!) "Unless you try to do something beyond what you have mastered you will never grow." Ralph Waldo Emerson The most important asset one can have is a strong mind. Forget all the material things many think are so important and would be lost without; a strong mind is really what we all need in life.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

How To Beat a Sociopath at His Own Dating Game!

Remember Sociopaths are opportunists and you are at risk for being that opportunity for him. I need five commitments from you if you want to avoid the wake of destruction that comes from dating a Sociopath. 1. Commitment to your Heart: Healing a broken heart takes time in pain and sorrow. Dating a Sociopath? Yes, he is fun, exciting, seductive, and yes he is superficial, without conscience, without compassion, a liar, and looking for the opportunity you are. It is not IF your heart will be broken, it is WHEN.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

The Female Bully and the Codependent Part II: “A Smelly Turd in a Pretty Package”

In Part One, we discussed some characteristics of the serial female family bully, the way she bullies, her targets and her end game. We looked at some interesting characteristics also seen with the codependent; poor self-esteem and inability to speak her truth or express her anger. In Part Two we are going to give you lots of examples, so you can identify if you are bullying or being bullied. The Setupr The female family serial bully (FSB) may try to set people up against her victim. This can be accomplished in many ways.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Codependency And #MeToo — A Brief History Of Abuse!

Our Historyr When we look at the history of women as it relates to men, we see that it has only been in the last 100 years that we were given rights. Before we had rights, women and children were the property of men. Men could do with us whatever they pleased, whenever they pleased. This included all forms of abuse: sexual, physical, and emotional. Having no rights, we were groomed to be compliant, to obey, to serve, to not speak up, to not have a voice, and generally be an extension of the man. Both church and state enabled and didn’t interfere with this paradigm.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

What Our Athletes Can Teach Us About Recovery!

This summer in particular, we had some pretty spectacular athletic competitions in England, France, and more recently, Rio. Whether you follow cycling, tennis or any of the competitions that took place in Rio, it is hard not to be inspired and learn from some of the stories. Stories and Goalsr First, all athletes come with a story. If we spend any time reading about and/or watching the athletic events we have been blessed with this summer, we begin to become a part of these people’s lives.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Bullying and The Codependent Part IV: “The Smelly Turd in the Pretty Package”

I assess bullying as a form of abuse. Our first child abuse laws had many starts and stops; they did not really gain traction until the 1970’s. These laws addressed physical and sexual abuse, not emotional abuse. Church and State enabled abuse and the paradigm that women and children were property of man and he could do as he wanted with his property. We do know female bullying in the workplace is on the rise. It is highly likely these same women are using their bullying tactics in other areas such as in their social situations and families. Healing From Emotional Bullying

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Narcissistic Abuse | Betrayal | Divorce | Codependency | People Pleasing | Authenticity | Backbone

Have you been a victim or do you know someone who's a victim of Narcissistic Abuse and Betrayal? Are you getting a Divorce? Do you want to learn more about Codependency and People Pleasing? Learn why havingAuthenticity and Backbone will help you. Be among the first to see my newest blog posts, updates, and more! Subscribe now and get a free sneak-preview of my book. Click here www.backbonepower.com/newsletter-signup

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

All Of Us Need To Say YES to OURSELVES

People-pleasers are at risk in the domains of finance, love, sex, family, and friendship. How is it that we can manage a successful business but still have a failed personal life? Extending a hand to others after taking care of yourself is how we make the world a better place for our children and our grand children. In today's world, it's no longer optional but mandatory to learn the skills of a warrior.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

5 Signs You Are In An Abusive Marriage

1. Physical Abuser In theory, in this country, no one can touch you as adults in any way (physically or sexually) without your permission. At the horrendous end of the spectrum of physical abuse are the stories we hear about the beating, burning, rape, mutilation, sex slaves, etc. and at the lesser end of the spectrum, we hear about people using their physicality to bully and get their way. In a healthy marriage, the couple respects each other’s physical boundaries and sex is a mutually agreed-upon part of intimacy.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

What Is Narcissistic Personality Disorder? Join Us For A *FREE LIVE* Telephone Interview | 8/16/2017 at 8PM CST

Join Us For A Queen Adventures Signature Ladies Night ! Topic: A Date With Danger Are you single and dating? Do you think you could be in a relationship with a narcissist or married to one? Do you have a daughter or young woman in your life that you want to love and protect? If the answer to any of the above questions is yes, this interview is for you..

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

How To Set Boundaries | Backbone Power

How To Set Healthy Boundaries and Live Life with Authenticity | Get Backbone Power Audiobook by Dr. Anne Brown -a psychotherapist, speaker, author, coach. https://backbonepower.com/backbonepower-audiobook/ A No-Nonsense Approach to Making Decisions. A Self Help Guide to having Backbone and Integrity in all your choices, short term, and long term. Is this decision going to be good for Me? To help Me be successful? How do I make the right choices? What are the effects and the outcomes? Ask yourself, Who am I really making these choices for?

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Codependent or Loving? Part I

How do I know if I am acting codependent or loving? This is an excellent question and often confusing for many for different reasons. Let’s look at the definitions of codependent and loving and see what we find. Love: An intense feeling of deep affection. For the purpose of this article, we will include some distinctions of love: Truth Strong Energizingr Codependency: Codependency for the purpose of this discussion is a recognizable system of learned personality traits that negatively affect knowing one’s self and others.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Codependency

A No Nonsense approach to Making Decisions. A Self Help Guide to having Backbone and Integrity in all your choices, short term and long term. Is this decision going to be good for Me? To help Me be successful? How do I make the right choices? What are the effects and the outcomes. Ask yourself, Who am I really making these choices for?

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

How The Moon Centers Can Turn A Woman's Life Around

Moon Centers. Let’s face it, many women have out-of-control emotions—huge emotional swings that they often blame on PMS, SMS, MPS—whatever! Some people would say it’s easier to just let the emotions rule. Wrong. As a woman, I’m sure that you’d welcome knowing that there are ways other than prescription drugs, to deal with your emotions—how to get them to work for you instead of the other way around—being a slave to them. I’m sure you agree.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Guidelines for Determining a Toxic Relationships

Should I leave my relationship? This question is probably one of the top ten reasons people have come into my practice asking for help. I am a therapist who prefers to work preventatively. I would like someone who is in the market for a relationship to already be in therapy. A good therapist can evaluate your history with intimacy, help you heal your wounds and help you get clear on who might be a good partner for you. A Quick Guide of Gauging Toxicityr

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Codependency and Narcissists: What Could Possibly Go Wrong? (Part I)

For this discussion, we are going to stick with our understanding of codependency as a system of distortions that exists on a continuum. Codependents learn personality traits that interfere with knowing one’s self and others. The people-pleasing aspect of codependency might drive the ignoring of who we are trying to please. The focus of wanting approval may keep us from acknowledging abusive behaviors coming from the very person whose approval we seek. The need for harmony might prevent us from realizing we are enabling abusive behavior. Or any combination of the above.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Prepare for Divorce (by: Dr. Anne Brown PhD, RN) | DivorceForce

Divorce with dignity! Be committed to be on the healing in two years not five year track! Children want to be normal again, not kids of those divorcing parents who are always fighting. Believe in yourself and what the future holds! Lean into the divorce, move through one step at a time, don't waste time blaming or being a victim, and get ready to reinvent yourself!! Read more: http://www.divorceforce.com/article/prepare-for-divorce-by-dr-anne-brown-phd-

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Denial- Take a Whack at Yours Today!

" You will never cross the ocean until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore." Christopher Columbus Denial is a mechanism we use consciously or unconsciously to alter reality, usually to pretend it is better than it is. We don't want to see aspects of life for which we have no solution or we don't like the solution.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Divorce Visitation Requests from Your Child (by: Dr. Anne Brown, PhD, CS) | DivorceForce

Dear Mom and Dad, Please remember my life has been turned upside down and I never had a vote. I don't have a rulebook to negotiate waters totally unfamiliar to me. It is really hard for me to understand that my family has broken up. I feel scared that I will loose one or both of you. I don't know what to do with all the bad feelings I have. It would really mean a lot to me if you could do a few things to help me with the land mines I seem to be stepping on. Thanks for taking the time to listen.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

ABUSE!! And what would you do??

The Grand Jury file on reports filed against Sandusky in the Penn State Sex abuse scandal illustrates some of the most egregious rationalizing (right up there with the Catholic Church's sexual abuse of children) in our country. There are some people involved who attempted to do the right thing and according to the report there are those who simply lied. If you want to educate yourself on minimalizing, rationalizing, doing the right thing, doing the right thing but others sabotaging your report, and not doing the right thing, read the report.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Backbone Tools: From Codependency to Dignity

Backbone Tools: From Codependency to Dignityr If you grew up in a family with lots of dysfunction e.g. alcohol, anger, illness physical or mental, Borderline/narcissistic (it is all about me), or any other phenomena other than adult people being normal loving parents to their children you may have developed the symptoms of codependency.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Common Sense Tools for the Friend of Someone Who is Brainwashed!

Most of us know or have known someone we care about who has come under the influence of a perpetrator using him/her for self-serving purposes. Very smart, educated, healthy people can, for some unknown, reason come under the spell of opportunistic, toxic, and insecure people. It is very puzzling for an observer of this phenomena to understand how the brainwashed person can’t see what is happening.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Backbone Power The Science of Saying No Books on Integrity |Books on Making Decisions |Books on decision making |Books on Co-Dependency

A No-Nonsense Approach to Making Decisions. A Self Help Guide to having Backbone and Integrity in all your choices, short term, and long term. Is this decision going to be good for Me? To help Me be successful? How do I make the right choices? What are the effects and the outcomes? Ask yourself, Who am I really making these choices for?

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Is it Love or Codependency?

How do I know if I am acting codependent or loving? This is an excellent question and often confusing for many for different reasons. Let’s look at the definitions of codependent and loving and see what we find. Love: An intense feeling of deep affection. For the purpose of this article, we will include some distinctions of love: Truth Strong Energizingr Codependency: Codependency for the purpose of this discussion is a recognizable system of learned personality traits that negatively affect knowing one’s self and others.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Clearing Old Thoughts

Yesterday I was weeding in my back yard and I had a realization. Weeding the yard is so much easier than weeding out our thoughts. Weeding out unwanted thoughts needs tools. What are your tools for weeding out ineffective thoughts? What about ones that actually take you down? Do you have different tools for each of these? I’m not into perfect tools I’m into effective ones. Are yours effective? I want to share some of my favorite tools. The first one is just to clear your head so you can calm down the chatter or lists, or all the peoples demands. Hands Shakingr

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Honoring Our Veterans!

We Are All One! We are living during a time where we have forgotten we are all one. We all have muscles, bones, organs, tissues, blood and we come in different colored packages. We also have different ideas. We have to find ways to connect through our similar beliefs and learn through our dissimilar beliefs. We also have to challenge our fears and ask ourselves are they grounded in reality or not. We have a golden rule that I still think works and is well said by Karen Armstrong.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

Have The Backbone To Say NO!

People-pleasers are at risk in the domains of finance, love, sex, family, and friendship. How is it that we can manage a successful business but still have a failed personal life? Extending a hand to others after taking care of yourself is how we make the world a better place for our children and our grand children. In today's world, it's no longer optional but mandatory to learn the skills of a warrior.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

2020 WNAAD Survivor Empowerment Telesummit Free Event

Take Your Recovery From Narcissistic Abuse To The Next Level! From the safety of your home learn trauma-transforming steps to not only empower you but also make notable reductions in the vast array of trauma symptoms. What would it be like to have an action-oriented roadmap for recovery that has helped thousands of survivors find their path to a vibrant and resilient recovery? Attend this Telesummit if you want to: Learn best practices and research-oriented strategies for healing the trauma of narcissistic abuse

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

In America You Are Allowed To Say NO!

"Two things define you; your patience when you have nothing, and your attitude when you have everything." In my article on March 2, 2014 and chapter two in my book Backbone Power The Science of Saying No, I speak about the importance of being able to say No when you mea No. After listening to Elliot Rodger's horrific video, I see that it is also important for us all to learn how to HEAR/ACCEPT the word No. There is not just one breakdown that led to this tragic shooting and this is one distinction that screams out to me.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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By Dr. Anne BrownRecently published1 topic

My Spouse has Borderline Personality Disorder! by Anne Brown, Author Backbone Power

When your spouse has borderline personality disorder (BP), whether it’s a sudden realization or a long-known fact, it can be challenging. Those in relationships with BP individuals may be subject to unique forms of manipulation or toxicity. Recognizing these habits of the BP is the first step to liberation. I will address different toxic tools here so you can pick from both articles the toxicity that you are experiencing. You may not have all of them and I may not address all of the ones you are experiencing. I also am addressing emotionally leaving the damage of the BP.

Primary topic: Psychology
Psychology
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