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Browse every published article connected to Dr. Dennis Neder, with exact attribution and full-archive search.
Articles
Browse every published article connected to Dr. Dennis Neder, or search within this exact expert archive.
Hey Doc: I was going out with this 24-year-old girl for about 3 months. We enjoyed our time together but she fell for me pretty hard. Since it was only 3 months, I believe that her feelings were mostly infatuation, but I'm not sure now. I panicked and broke up with her because I don't think ...
I met this girl online about 6 weeks ago and we clicked right away. We talked via the phone and internet for hours at a time almost every night. We even had live video sessions with each other so when she moved back into the area we met up face to face and she seemed to be interested in me. She ...
Dear Dr. Neder: I am 22 and the guy I am writing about is 35. The age difference doesn’t bother me at all but the fact he treats me like a princess does. I have always been attracted to the bad boy type so really I am not sure why I was even attracted to this guy. He is an amazing guy ...
Dear Dr. Neder, I read your answer on 'Trust' on the Internet and I hope you can help me. I am engaged to be married this December. The problem is I feel that my fiancé is not emotionally available to me during love making. I know she has been emotionally hurt by her past boyfriend seven ...
Hi Dr. Neder, I read some of your articles and your advice is great. I just recently hooked up with a girl that actually picked me up at club. She really liked me a lot and for the first few weeks, I played hard to get with her. She wanted to get me settled down and kind of coerced me into a ...
Hello! I have a fairly serious issue regarding my parents and my relationship with my boyfriend. I am 22 years old and I live completely on my own, however, my parents still give me problems about my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 3 years. I love him very much and he ...
Doc: My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. We have lived together for 2 years and we get along fine. We have our times but not many of them. I do everything for him: cook, clean, and everything else a wife would do. I love him very much but I want to start a family. I don't mean ...
Hey Doc! I've been dating off and on since my divorce a few years ago. I generally am completely open with my dates, and willingly share information about my life history. I've just met a gal who is a Psychologist. She has challenged my practice, saying that there are some things that are ...
Doc: I'm dating this wonderful girl, but we've been going through issues in regards to the "chase" factor. We've already professed love for each other, so it's in a deeper stage than just the chasing phase, but she says of course that she wants to feel like she's still "chasing" me, since she loses interests in guys that are, well, served on a silver platter. How do you keep her feeling as if she's chasing you, even though you're in a deeper relationship already?
Let’s say that you’ve dated a girl a few times and all of a sudden, she stops picking up the phone or returning your calls when she was very responsive before. What do you do? First, you stop pouting and sitting by the phone trying to will her to call by sending your aura through the telephone ...
Have you ever seen a magician at a party walking around doing close-up magic? Everyone seems fascinated by it – even if the magician isn’t that good. There are probably just as many people hoping the performer will flop as those that are fascinated by it. This brings me to an interesting way to ...
Hi Dennis, I'm a single gal who (despite being very attractive) has not been on a date with a man in a year. I have exchanged numbers with several men during that time but none seem interested (mainly they were dating another girl already so I keep missing my chance.) I keep a very friendly, ...
Hello Doc! I've been dating a guy for awhile now. I haven't had many relationships, so I'm getting used to moving out of the honeymoon stage. My problem is, I know it's normal to get used to people and kind of let your faults come through as you get more comfortable with the person. I’m ...
In a Sea of Messages, This One’s Mixed Hello Doctor, I need your advice on a little dilemma of mine. There is this guy that I've known for quite some time now. It started off with just getting together for drinks and then a couple times for dinner, but it's been over a year and I don't know ...
Hi Dr. Neder: My problem is that I don’t want to play the dating game and I don’t know how to avoid it. I’m not interested in the type of relationship that’s a sort of fragile peace treaty after a war of conquest. When I consider what’s involved in the dating ...
Dear Dr. Neder: I came across your website as I was searching for “sabotaging relationships”. My "boyfriend" (of 3 intense months) has brought up that term for the third time. We are challenged by distance as he lives about an hour away from me. He works 6 days a week at a very intense job in a ...
Even a broken watch is right twice a day, and yes, many people DO get their ex's back. The real question you should be asking however is "should you?" Nature plays this glorious trick on each of us. When we break up with someone, we're angry and hurt, we feel loss and helplessness. We have a flood of negative emotions. However, over time, we forget all of that pain and only remember the good, happy times. This is the most dangerous thing there is in rekindling any relationship!
Hey Dennis! I read one of your replies to a question and thought your response was excellent. Could you please could you help with this one? I was in a relationship with my ex for just over a year, when we first started dating. I was finding it very hard to get her out on dates. She is a very ...
Maybe you’d be surprised at the number of letter I get from women that begin, “I recently met this really cute guy…” and end with “How do I get him to ask me out?” And then again, maybe you wouldn’t; particularly if you’re a woman. It seems that today’s man is all but devoid of basic manly ...
Hey Doc! I just want to say thanks for helping to transform me into a better man tha I was! Growing up, I had a dad that was often not available due to work. He and my mother would frequently get into fights with him screaming and yelling (he never hit my mother however) but my limited time with my dad up until high school feminized me a bit. I always got to hear moms side of the story, and started looking at everything from her point of view – highly feminized.
I've been dating the same guy on and off for 3 years and I think it’s about time for a change considering that he never does anything to make me feel special. The problem is that I can’t seem to meet a 'nice guy' in the city I live. I have considered moving however my career keeps ...
My Wife and I have been married for almost 8 years. We have 2 beautiful boys and a girl (7, 4 and 5 y/o.) Lately it has been totally impossible to get her to have "alone time" with me. I have tried talking to her, flirting with her and just doing special romantic things for her but every night ...
Dr. Neder, My good friend has asked you a few questions and spoke very highly of the advice you've given him and the results he's received. I’ll take his word for it, and try to keep this brief, but I do want to give you the some background. I’m 23 and have a good degree and career. Two weeks ago, I went on a first date with a young woman. We live about an hour away. I have known her and her family for 6 years – she is the younger sister of my best friend; also a girl.
Dear Dr. Neder, What's a good way to enter into a sexual relationship so that you don't go too fast or too slow? Sometimes if the guy goes too fast it can be really threatening to the woman (unless she likes it of course.) Hello! This is an excellent question! The key is to not try to ...
Dear Dr. Dennis, I was in a relationship for 5 and a half years. The relationship is breaking up. My partner is not satisfied with me, I believe. He has said he wants to see other people and wants to consider other options. But he says he still cares or me and he is confused. I just read a ...
Dear Dr. Neder: I am an African female who has very short hair and for these reasons, I feel that men are intimidated by me. I am 5'0 feet tall and very petite with a voluptuous body. Aside from my looks however, my speaking abilities are very polished and I also major in Math and Computer ...
Dear Dr. Neder: My boyfriend and I have only been dating a year and 2 months. I do really care for him and I pray he cares for me as well. Here is my concern, he has hidden things from me before, and I have found out and now I'm getting afraid he is doing it again. He has promised me that he ...
Hello Doc: I've never really known much of anything about dating. I'm 26 years old and I've never had a serious relationship. I feel like I've missed out on a lot of knowledge over the years and I feel like I'm sunk. Where can I go to meet people? How do I introduce myself when I find ...
I’ve been promoting a new concept on my show that has been very successful in explaining how attraction and love work. I call these them (collectively) “The Formula”. Is there really a “formula” for attraction and love? Yes, there is. I discovered them when I was working on what sorts of ...
Dear Dr. Neder, I have been reading your column for a while and I never thought that I might need help myself. But lo and behold I am here writing you this letter. I am naturally a cocky, funny asshole beautiful girl which lets me date out of my league and makes men bend over backwards for ...
I keep reading that if a man is interested he will ask you out (which I think is true to a point). When a guy asks you out that definitely shows interest, but it is hard for me to believe that every single guy has the guts to ask out all the girls he has been interested in. My question is: ...
Hello – This is questions requires some background information. My ex-boyfriend and I just broke up about a month ago after a two-year relationship because he got into medical school 7 hours from home, and I can’t move because I had accepted a really great job. We decided that long distance ...
Hi Doc: I guess my situation is common but let me ask what you think any way. I am a 42 year old woman that has been dating a 50 year old man for 4 years now, we have been living together for 2 years now and we’re both divorced. When we met I was very clear what I wanted and he seemed ...
Many people complain that they “hate to date”. Are you one of them? If so, it’s very likely that you’re afraid of just having to make “good” conversation. You don’t want it to come off as labored but you don’t want the awkward silences or misunderstandings and miscommunications either. If only early date conversations where easy and natural. Well, they can be, if you only know a few simple rules: Rule #1 – First dates are “interviews”
Hello Dr. Dennis! My girlfriend (2 years of a wonderful relationship) and I have been talking about an “open relationship” where we both could find other sex partners but stay together as a couple. We’re both enthusiastic about it but I wanted to get your take. Is this a good idea? Will it ruin our relationship? Thanks! ------------------------------ Hello! Yes, I have a lot to say about open relationships. They can be extremely good or extremely bad – I find very little in between! There are reasons for that I’ll get into in a moment.
Hey Dennis! I’ve read your website and I think you might be able to help me. I’ve had numerous relationships and have no trouble getting girls. I’m approaching 30 now and trying to find the girl of my dreams. There is this girl I have known for about a year or so that has always not only ...
“Just what do men want anyway?” Yes, I get that question a lot these days and no, I don’t just answer with “sex”. (Yes, men want sex, but that’s not really the answer to this question.) You keep hearing that “men are simple” and that’s not really true. It’s based on that however that you often believe sex is the only answer. In fact, men are actually rich, varied and pretty complicated – just like women are. Thus, answering a question like that with something as simple as “sex” is pretty sophomoric and frankly, misleading. Let me try to clear up the fog a little. Men want:
Hi Dennis, I like this guy. He’s one of those really hot guys that every girl likes and he knows it and he seems stuck up and conceited about it. He knows all the women want him and definitely knows he's hot stuff but all the times I have talked to him he seems nice. So today I saw him ...
Doctor Neder: I am in a serious relationship of almost a year. We have one major problem that continues to come up. When we were first dating, we'd been out maybe a dozen times and slept together maybe 6 times, had no conversations about being exclusive and at a party I was intimate with ...
Hi Dr. Neder, I LOVE your books! They really helped me and this letter is an example of what I’ve learned. I was walking out of this building on campus and by chance I see this girl walking next to me. Every one around was wearing kind of uniform for orientation and I thought that would be a ...
Do women even want a nice guy anymore? I've been a nice guy all my life. Upbringing taught me to be nice to everyone. I open doors for women, compliment them, laugh with them, do nice things for them such as favors and such. What do I get in return? “You’re so sweet and ...
Hey Doc: I had a friend that is very important to me ask me out. I told him he was important, but just a friend. I didn't say “yes” to him because mostly I've been thinking about a couple of other guys, one in particular, that I want to go out with. They seemed to have shown signs ...
Hi Dr. Neder, I am a 24 year-old med student and cannot find the right woman. I have been told I'm a handsome and outgoing, and my women friends always tell me I'm a catch. I've been involved with a couple women that logically seem like the type I'd like to get involved with, but I never ...
Dear Dr. Neder: I’m 23 years old and I met this guy (25) about 6 months ago and we really hit it off. He’s absolutely perfect! We got along great and started dating and things turned physical pretty quickly. I’ve decided to wait until I’m married before I’ll have sex but we made out and ...
Hi, So a week ago I met this girl. She was an old high school friend of a new student in my department that I don't know well yet. Anyway, I had a great time chatting with this girl. We had lived in/traveled to similar places, had similar complaints about the local traffic, and so on. It seemed ...
So, what’s it going to be this year? Crowded, noisy restaurant with lousy service? The usually dozen red roses? Jewelry? Card? A lot of whimpering and crying? Here’s the problem with Valentine’s Day: It has become the lousiest “Hallmark Holiday” on the calendar. It’s supposed to be a day to express love and appreciation for your partner (or partners?) Instead it has become a day where women expect huge, meaningful messages and often wind up either disappointed or angry because the expression wasn’t “just right”.
I'm a 19 year old guy studying at college in the UK and there is a girl who I've seen around, mainly in the library. I would like to approach her but have no clue what to say and I'm afraid she might laugh at me for trying to speak to her. I have no confidence and I'm afraid the girl has noticed my interest because she's caught me looking a few times. How do I approach her and what do I say? ====================== Hello! First of all, this girl isn't going to laugh at you for talking to her. That's just your own fears getting in the way.
Hi Doc: I am 30 years old and have never been on a date. I had very bad anxiety because of my obsessive compulsive disorder. It's not as bad now, but I don't have much experience talking to people. I talk to people at work and they want to help me, but I fear I am not experienced enough. I ...
I’ve been friends with this girl all through high school but since December we have been best friends. The past 2 months we have brought our friendship to a new level - friends with benefits you could say. She has been going out with another guy for about 2 years but they were on a "break" ...
Dr. Neder: I've been dating a guy for 6 months. We were inseparable we spend loads of time together. We get along fantastic our families love each other. There is one big problem. I had to move back to the tow I'm from which is where he lives. I noticed that he didn't want me in his home when ...