Browse Relationship Advice

There I was, running around trying to juggle umpteen items nand doing only a fair job of it at best. There was my ntherapy business, and I have been putting big pieces into nplace to add coaching to my business along with having to nprepare a presentation for an annual convention. Then ...

I received a disturbing email this week. It's one of many on the same theme which I have received over time, so I knew it was time to address this issue. Here's the story. A young lady's boyfriend went to see a doctor for depression. She shared with me that the doctor apparently said he has ...

I yawn, stretch my arms behind my head and stare at the ceiling. I've been in bed for a few minutes. Ahhh, the peaceful quiet all around. The room is dark. The kids are asleep. It's an expansive moment for my mind. My mind seems to fill the entire room. Okay, it's been 20 minutes now. The ...

Relationships in which one individual is depressed are ninetimes more likely to divorce. Wow, the normal divorce rateis already over 60% nationally! But, it's not always aspouse who is depressed, sometimes it is a child or anextended family member. In this article, however, we'll be focusing ...

Don't worry, I'm not going to get in the pulpit but I willchallenge you to take an objective look at what faith maybe able to do for your depression. In doing so, we'll belooking at many people who use faith in different ways. Did you know that someone who practices healing touch, suchas ...

Ah yes, the you can just now begin to feel the cold bite in the air during the mornings and evenings. Soon the leaves will turn all sorts of brilliant colors. The autumn season is on it's way. I love the fall. It's my favorite season of the year. Unfortunately, for many who suffer from a ...

Are you suffering from depression or a medical condition? Depression can be a symptom of an undiagnosed medical condition. Decision trees are used in psychotherapy much like they are in other professions. At the top of the decision tree are always two items to rule out FIRST, before making a ...

The holidays bring grief to an all new height for those who are nsuffering from losses or struggle with depression, anxiety, nchronic illness or other such disorders. This newsletter is for nthose who suffer and for those who love them. If it's a merry Christmas for you, please take a moment ...

In the "Anxiety Disorders" section of the manual entitled "Diagnostic Criteria from DSM IV," which is used for the ndiagnosis of mental health conditions, there are 12 anxiety ndiagnoses covered. The fifth, and what may appear to be a soft diagnosis, is Social Phobia (Social Anxiety ...

You have and will experience sadness. It might be the loss of a job, pet or a loved one. Yes, even a loved one. The trouble is, particularly here in the United States, we have a quick-fix for everything... why not sadness too? Our quick-fix for sadness is that it's simply not allowed. Healthy ...

I like to think that as a professional psychotherapist & coach, the space in which I work in my office is a smaller reflection of our much larger culture here in the USA. Let me explain. Our culture is constantly on the move towards faster, more convenient ways of doing things. I'm caught ...

I've heard it said that by the end of January, over 90% of individuals who make New Years resolutions don't remember what they were. Why is this so? People are often sincere, however, they are not yet in the right place for big changes in their lives. Many others want to continue same ...

Have you ever overheard people talking about couples that have been married for a very long time? One of things often said is how a couple will begin to look alike over time. How and why do you think this occurs? This phenomenon parallels a tea bag being steeped in clear water. After a while ...

A tremendous amount of stress occurs when you don't understand and accept your limitations. When you attempt to control something in life that is not within your sphere of influence how do you feel and react? What is it like for you to experience powerlessness? Can you control another's ...

Are you and your spouse not seeing eye to eye on much anymore? Find out in this guide whether it's time for marriage therapy and get that spark back. Staying in a long-term, committed relationship is one of the most difficult things human beings demand of themselves. When you live hand-in-hand with another person ...

One of the hardest things to do when you're communicating with someone is expressing yourself. How many times have you said something that just didn't come out the way you wanted it to? How many times have we said something that we really didn't mean, but we were too frustrated to stop it from being said? What's more, some people have a fear of expressing themselves at all. They're afraid to say something that might cost them a friendship. Or they bottle everything up tight and seize up at the mere thought of sharing their true emotions. This can be a constant struggle for people.

It seems that everywhere you look, many long-standing (or short) relationships and/or marriages are dissolving. If you’re like most people, when this happens, you find yourself stuck in thinking about the past, wondering what went wrong, and unable to move from the pain of the relationship. ...

Any idiot can ramble on about in conversation and bore the bejesus out of their companions, and it is a legitimate fear for many that this embarrassing turn of events may happen to them at some point. We've all been there, stuck in conversation, trying to dig out of it by throwing everything we can think of out there. The best advice, however, is to simply find an interesting way to broach everyday questions. Here are 11 such questions. 1. Tell me about the most interesting

How will I know I am in Love? By America’s #1 Love and Marriage Experts. In our many interviews with people “in love” we ask them, perhaps, the most revealing question of the interview – “How will I know I am in love?” We have heard very consistent answers. And conversely, many people involved in a new loving relationship, particularly young people, often ask us, “How do I know if I am in love?” We think we know the answer.

Would the prince have chose Cinderella to marry if she was a miserable young woman? If her stepsisters were beautiful but miserable, would he have chosen either of them? Are you living under the delusion that when you meet your soul mate you will finally be happy - that your misery is because ...

It’s confusing, isn’t it? One moment you think you’ve found your soul mate, the next moment he’s stopped calling. You rack your brain for any clue that would explain his behavior. Nothing. Zero. You got along well, he worshipped the ground you walked on. He was smitten by you as much as you were by him. Or so you thought. Should you end the relationship now, while you can still crawl out of the black hole called love? After all, he’s not the only fish in the sea. Or

Good relationships don’t just happen. I’ve heard many of my clients state that, “If I have to work at it, then it’s not the right relationship.” This is not a true statement, any more than it’s true that you don’t have to work at good physical health ...

In 25 years as a judge dealing with relationship issues I almost never had to resolve legal disputes. People were almost always before me because someone got defensive and became a bad problem solver. Defensiveness is a poison pill to good relationships. In conflict, defensiveness is like blood in the water to a shark. A little here, a little there, and in no time the situation has degenerated into a feeding frenzy. Remaining non-defensive is the single most important thing y

How many of you are confronted with a situation that the guy you are dating and attracted to is not really ready to move your relationship to the next level? Or that he hasn't taken down his profile from the dating site yet after a few months seeing each other? It feels scary for you now that you feel hormonally hooked on him.

Text messaging is one of the most powerful ways to flirt and build attraction and to lay a great foundation for a lasting relationship with a man.

Rebound relationship is a common occurrence during a breakup. My clients usually get terribly anxious when they find out that their exes are dating again or entering a new relationship. They want to know how to stop this or how their exes can do this, what that means, etc. They ask, "Does it mean they're over me?" Chill, folks. The answer is, very likely, no and the fact that they're seeing someone else can actually work in your favor as it serves as a clarity and as such it can even hasten the reconciliation process if you know how to handle yourself.

"I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line." --Lucile Ball, 1911-1989, Comedienne and Actress Lucile Ball was a very smart woman! Do you believe that if you put others first, they will love and value you and you will feel loved? Has this worked for you?

If your partner had an affair, you might be trying to figure out how this happened. Whether you are still in this relationship or not, your heart might feel broken into a million pieces. Unfortunately, some of the beliefs that you may hold about infidelity could be making your broken heart pain worse than it already is. There are many misconceptions about why people cheat.

If you have a new guy in your life and are in the early stages of courtship, chances are good you will be texting him and he will be texting you. Flirty texting is fun, but if you aren't careful, you can unknowingly put a huge damper on his attraction.

The key of dating an emotionally unavailable man who wants to take things slow is to let him set the pace. Expect that he will go hot and cold. Mirror him in everything he does. When he's hot, reciprocate that, this is your time to establish bonding. When he's cold, also keep a distance. Don't try to force yourself unto him asking for attention and affection. He will only withdraw further. Trust His Actions, Why Words Don't Mean So Much For A Man.

A fan wrote me a heartfelt email: Hi Katarina, me and my bf of almost 2 years broke up about 3 and a half months ago. It was not a bad break up, but he felt like he could not handle the pressure of a full-blown relationship. In the time that we have been apart I have learned a lot and recently we have started talking again.

There is an excellent discussion going on in my private group: "For years we read from women that we should play hard to get. There are countless books written by women on this topic. What are your thoughts on why women believe we should play hard to get and men believe we should not? Do you believe women who hold the idea of playing hard to get contribute to their own demise?"

Building good character is all about addition, not subtraction. What I mean is this: when it comes to change, our focus is usually on the aspects of our lives that are bad. We try to cut out or cut off these negative or bad qualities. We try to improve by subtraction. That is not how you build good character. It is the process of addition in your life that brings the character. In so doing, you automatically take care of the other negative aspects. As both a father and a pastor of a Church, I look for ways to continually add to the character of those I am responsible for.

I want to address an important issue from my reader, about guys who lose their sexual mojo when they're settled with you (something that isn't very uncommon -surprise, surprise- which is the main reason why my marriage fell apart). So here it goes:

Everyone knows breaking up is hard to do. But staying in contact with your ex following a breakup? That's where things get really tricky. By remaining in each other's lives, you run the risk of a post-breakup rendezvous, holding onto feelings for your ex, and in general delaying your ability to heal and move on quickly (and without additional heartache). The following are some tips to help you avoid a post-breakup backslide into your ex’s arms, and instead ease you into your happily ever after future: Tip #1: Create new boundariesr Your best defense after a breakup?

Many relationships have been destroyed over the jealousy issue. However, sometimes it isn't so much jealousy but envy and covetousness that is the real root of the problem. Here is a brief definition of each before we get into a lager discussion of these. Jealousy - The fear of losing something that you feel already belongs to you. Covetousness - The desire of that which is not yours and currently unattainable as it belongs to someone else or lies outside your ability to get.

Has someone close to you broken your trust by lying? Is it difficult to get back on track and reestablish that trust relationship you thought you had? If so, there is hope! It's possible to get back to having a healthy and satisfying relationship with a person who has been lying. Understanding ...

Permissions: You may publish this article free of charge in your ezine, web site, ebook or print publication so long as the copyright notice and the resource paragraph (at the end ofrnthe article) are included. Laurie Weiss, Ph.D. Email: media@laurieweiss.com ------------ Article Begins Below This Line ------------ R-E-S-P-E-C-T: 25 Ways To Show It Copyright 2004 Laurie Weiss, Ph.D. Convicted criminals report that their violent behavior was caused by perceived disrespect.* Everyone wants to be treated with respect, but respect means different things to different people.

The feeling of falling in love is of the most exciting, thrilling and life changing events. Falling in love can change your entire outlook on life. Falling in love can occupy your mind and seem to take away all of life's problems. However, falling in love can bring about a serious problem of ...

Eighty percent of men are distancers and 80% of women are pursuers. Women have 10-15 times more oxytocin (the bonding hormone) than men, and men have 10 times more testosterone (go-getter hormone) than women: so based on that chemical proportion alone, it's obvious women need more closeness than what most men can give. At least when we understand this, we will be less inclined to feel abandoned or think of worst case scenarios.

Ten Things To Do After A Breakup To Get On With Your Life: 1. Know that grieving someone and missing them does not necessarily mean you want them. It means you hurt because you've had a loss. Perhaps that loss is the best thing but it's still a loss. Don't mistake grief for love. It's ...

The Rubber Band Man \ Is he taking a time out or is this a sign about your future? \ By John Gray, author of Men are from Mars Women are from Venus \ Just days ago your favorite Martian was holding you in his arms telling you how special you are and how much he loves you and now three days have gone ... The

Sometimes a relationship ends and for whatever reason one person is not able to let it go. They want to be back with the person that they were in the relationship with. They may have feelings that they cannot let go of. Or perhaps they have realized that the relationship ending was not the right thing and they want to fix it.

Some women get really hurt from just a few month fling? Why? Because they invest too much, too soon in the relationship and have soaring expectations of it. They buy into the fairy tale they concoct themselves that this is it: he's the One and they're "in love" not realizing that the dizzying feeling of being in love is actually a function of chemical cocktails in the brain and can easily be induced upon oneself because it feels great to be in love. Everyone wants it. However, it's not necessarily so.

If you feel empty, you are not alone in feeling this way. Many people feel empty inside, and most people who feel empty have some deep false beliefs regarding why they feel empty. Below are some of these false beliefs. I feel empty because: • My partner is not giving me enough love and attention. • I don't have a partner. • I'm bored because my partner doesn't provide me with enough stimulation.

The fear of rejection is a huge issue in relationships. For some, the fear is so huge that it stops them from being in a relationship. For others, it plagues them throughout their relationships and causes much anxiety. Rejection is a part of life, and learning to lovingly manage it is very important to our wellbeing. To help you learn to move beyond the fear of rejection, I would like to help you see who a person is rejecting when they reject you. Are they rejecting your wounded self or your core Self?

Are You a Love Addict? Are you in a Break-Up from an Addictive Relationship? There is no doubt that for most people, “breaking up is hard to do”… for love addicts, breaking up is especially difficult. One of the most disturbing and defining features of addiction is withdrawal and obsessive withdrawal is the ultimate confirmation of love addiction when a relationship ends. You may feel paralyzed in your grief, locked into the past, totally obsessed and unable to move forward. The pain feels unrelenting.

As a man, one of the hardest things to do is to get over a girl who has cheated on you. Remember that she was the one who cheated on you and dumped you for somebody else. It hurts your ego to a great extent. Some guys call and text their exes in such a way to make them regret about their wrong doings. However, you can’t make your ex girlfriend regret cheating on you. She did so because she was already moving on from the relationship with you. She had already made her mind not to stay with you any longer. Therefore, she cheated on you.

We've been told that the way to love is pretty linear and straightforward with guys. They take us to a first date, they like us, they make plans and ask us to be exclusive within a month or two, they fall in love and pop the question. Trust me when I say that very often guys don't know how they feel about you in the long run nor do they know what they want. And often the route isn't that straightforward either. That's WHY giving the right impression in the beginning is very important.

One of my best male friends was looking for me on IM feeling totally desperate because his wife was seriously talking about divorce now. They have been on that route before but this time she was totally serious. They have been having a rocky marriage as long as I can remember.

Freedom, separation, aggression, conquest, goal seeking and sex are the basic nature of testosterone. You’ve seen how many wars and conquests have been waged by men since the beginning of time. That’s the side effect of testosterone. It has also contributed to so much magnificence in the world: invention, creation, technology and innovation. Men are programmed and conditioned to constantly seek achievements and success. That’s their raison d’etre, like the birds’ nature is to fly and the fish’s is to breath in the water. Embrace it instead of faulting them for it.

Some people believe that it is caring to point out their partner's flaws - that it will help to make that person a better person. But the intent behind pointing out flaws is not loving - it is controlling. Pointing Out Flaws By pointing out flaws, you hope that your partner will let go of the things that you don't like and become more the person you want him or her to be. Now, be honest with yourself - is it working? Your partner might have one of two major responses to your judgments.

You are emotionally dependent when your happiness, sense of safety, and sense of worth are dependent upon others' love, attention, and approval. When you were growing up, perhaps you heard statements like: "What will the neighbors think?" "What will__(so and so)__think if you do that?"

"I can have a really great day, but when I wake up the next morning I feel anxious. Sometimes the better day I've had, the more anxious I am the next morning. I can't figure it out." I hear this over and over from my clients. What is happening here? The Tyranny of the Ego Wounded Self

I remember hearing years ago from a man I studied with, that he and his wife had an agreement: she was to say "yes" to him every time he wanted sex. It was the condition for the fulfillment of their monogamy promise. "If you want me to only have sex with you, then you need to provide for and take care of my need for sex."

Ladies, if you are serious about satisfying him better than ever before - listen up. Men aren't as complicated as they may seem at first. If you want to conquer him and make him go insane over you, you have to give him the best sex humanly possible. You have to give him more pleasure in bed than he got from all the other women he's been with before you. The thing is that you don't have to be the best in the world, you just have to better than other women he comes across with.

Jealousy can a bit tempting and exciting - it can be proof that someone is totally into you. A sign of jealousy can also be good - just as long as it's not destructive. Trying to make a guy jealous is a gamble in your part - it's either going to make him pursue you more or just plainly walk away or never look back. That's why it's important to find out if he likes you, even just a tiny bit. When all your attempts fail, it's probably because you didn't do it right or he simply

Men are visual creatures, while looks will get you in the door, in the long run it is emotional attraction that will keep him glued to you. What is emotional attraction to a man? It is everything in a woman that makes him feel supported, accepted and respected because all of that is the embodiment of love to him. She is an oasis to him, the source of life that brings beauty and serenity in the mostly troubled world he battles in.

Ladies, are you fed up with all the nonsense advice you get from magazines promising you to lose 50 lbs in 3 days? So am I. As a guy, I am a just another "victim" of these tips and I urge you gorgeous ladies to stop listening to that nonsense. Instead, here's some common sense from me. I won't give you another 127 "funky" tips, I'll just give you 3 real life tips that actually work. Men aren't as complicated as the magazines want you to think. It's actually pretty simple to f

Are you a dumped girlfriend? What does it take to move on after a guy has broken up with you? Do you want to move on, but are paralyzed by sadness? Here is a dumped girlfriend guide to moving on. While Still Mou ing, Do Realize That You Can Still Seduce Your Ex Back. Here's How: The Ultimate Method of Getting Your Ex Back

As an author and psychotherapist with an international private practice, I've often come across women who are involved with Ambivalent Men. An Ambivalent Man struggles with a profound sense of confusion that causes him to repeatedly sabotage romantic relationships (or potential romantic relationships) that could have otherwise been healthy and lasting. The Ambivalent Man always sends double messages. Red light, green light; stop, go; he wants you, he wants to break up; he's i

Friendship isn't a unique relationship in addition to all the other ones. In fact, friendship is more than that. When any of your relationships can become friends, then it has reached the pinnacle of that relationship. I don't have a wife, children, parents, and then friends. No, each of these other relationships has become friends too. I want to be a friend to my children, to my parents, and certainly to my wife. I married my best friend. She is my wife, but she is also my friend. But how do you repair a damaged or broken friendship?

Don't we all want to grow into the fullest and most authentic expression of ourselves? Shakespeare wrote, "To thine own self be true." When it comes to creating a successful life the place to start is with ourselves. Read on and discover a daily practice to help you really get to know yourself! Success in life can mean different things for different people. But one thing that's common to most people's definition is the ability to be true to ourselves no matter what is going on around us.

September 11, 2001 was the world’s wake up call. After the chaos and confusion, we awoke to the realization that life is a precious gift and that it is our responsibility as a citizen and human being to lead and live our best life. For most of us, that meant looking at our current state of affairs and recognizing all the changes we needed to make. We often know it is important to change our lives, but do not know where to begin. Change can be easy, really---by changing your thoughts, you change your feelings, and thus change your actions.

How many times a day do we wonder: am i attractive enough? The answer is not simple, yet it is. You are and you are not. It depends on to whom you are talking and what you mean by attractive. Why do we play this “attractive” game when we don’t know what we want to achieve by trying so hard to be ...

One of my favorite quotes of all time is "Don't make people a priority who only make you an option". I often repeat this quote to myself and have it posted in several areas of my house, as well as my daily planner. It's something I try to remember on a daily basis. We talk a lot about the toxins in our environment, our personal care products and our food. But there is another place where we can get exposed to emotional and mental toxins, and that is in our day to day relatio

The college aged daughter of a close friend of mine recently asked her mom "my boyfriend wants to take a break, what does that mean?" Her daughter was confused, heart broken and a little angry and was looking for advice. If you're in the same situation here are a few tips than can help you through this 'limbo' and allow you to come out the other side intact. Why Men Pull Away Even When They Are In Love With You!

Famous agony aunt tells you how to get a job as a professional paid agony aunt.

Research indicates that children would rather be yelled at than ignored. When prisoners are being punished, they are put in isolation, because being isolated is one of the harshest punishments there is - other than physical abuse. The silent treatment is a form of punishment, a way to attempt to control children and partners into doing what you want them to do. It is a withdrawal of approval, and can cause much fear in people who are vulnerable to this.

Have you had a relationship with a man that has unfortunately always been on the on-and-off track? Wanting him back is a completely normal reaction to a breakup, regardless of whether the feelings come right away, or over time. Here are some proactive tips for turning your ex to be in love with you again and even find you more attractive than before.

What is a high maintenance relationship? A high maintenance relationship is when someone is making you responsible for him or her in various different areas of life. Emotional High Maintenance When a person takes no responsibility for their own feelings of safety, security, worth, lovability, wellbeing, or happiness, they are high maintenance.

Is fighting a problem in your relationship or marriage? Fighting is a very serious problem for many couples. The good news is that I am about to help you solve it permanently. First you have to understanding that you should not fight at all, with anyone. I don’t mean you should not disagree with others or your signi

Are you emotionally dependent? You might want to go through this checklist. __I cannot feel lovable and worthy without another's approval. __I need a lot of attention from certain people to feel that I am okay. __I don't trust my own feelings. I need others' to validate my feelings. __I am afraid of rejection. I isolate, or try to be perfect, or agree with others, or give myself up, or shut down, and/or do many other things to avoid rejection. __I am afraid to be alone. __I often feel empty inside. __I am often anxious around others.

Love is where most of us begin our relationships, but then 3 years down the road, many couples lose connection, and love fades. Our counselors help couples move through conflict and restore the connection. We teach folks how to communicate about their deepest feelings, to create intimacy.