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Articles by Greg Baker

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61 articles by Greg Baker · showing 50

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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Conversation Secrets On How To Talk To Anyone About Anything

This very simple and easy to follow procedure will help you develop strong conversation skills with people you know and people you don’t know. This skill is meant to help you build lasting connections with people and feel at ease while doing it regardless of your knowledge of the subject or topic. Proverbs 15:23 - A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it! The secret, if there is one, lies in the quality of a good question. I’ll explain in a moment, but first there is another factor that must be addressed.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Dealing with a Midlife Crisis

If you or someone you know is having a midlife crisis, then you may want to know how to properly deal with it. This period in a person's life is extremely dangerous. They can become depressed, disillusioned with life, and even quit things or relationships they should not. Primarily, a midlife crisis is caused by two realizations: 1. The realization that they haven't accomplished much or anything that is truly worthwhile. 2. The realization that they probably have fewer years ahead of them then they do behind them.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

How Do I Know If I Have Faith?

In Christianity, faith is the principle upon which we build our relationship with God. It is the key to experiencing God, seeing the hand of God in our lives, and fulfilling the purpose for which God made us. But many Christians struggle with the idea and concept of faith. This article will help. The most famous Bible verse regarding the definition of faith is the one found in Hebrews 11. Hebrews 11:1 - Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. The word ‘hope’ is the key to knowing if you have faith or not.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Healing From The Trauma Of An Extramarital Affair

Your spouse cheated on you. Nothing you can do will change that. Still, you’ve decided to stick it out and try to make the marriage work. Only you don’t trust him/her anymore, you are incredibly suspicious, and your anxiety of possibly being betrayed again is eating your heart out. You still feel intense pain over the last betrayal, and you can’t get past it to do your part in healing the marriage. This article gives some hints and tips to help you. FIND A GOOD PASTOR OR MARRIAGE COUNSELOR

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Making and Keeping Good Friends

There are many reasons why people struggle to make friends. Here are a few: - Insecurity - Selfishness - Pride - An Introvert Personality - Fear of People - Overwhelming and dominate personality - Depression But whatever the problem is, it needs to be addressed and conquered. You will never have fulfillment in life that you want unless you can achieve strong relationships. Experiencing things with others is often more enjoyable than experiencing them alone.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Why Every Married Couple Ought To Date

For some reason, many couples find that much of the intrigue and interest in their relationship dwindled after marriage. One reason may be that the effort of pursuit and being pursued as evidenced by dating is no longer a part of the couples’ lives. Dating, at least once a week, will renew the excitement and interest in a marriage. WHY DATING IS IMPORTANT FOR THE MARRIED COUPLE Before marriage, dating was about pursuing and being pursued. Typically, a man pursued a woman by wooing her and by treating her well within the context of the date.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

The Ten Christian Principles For A Successful Marriage

I’ve counseled and been the pastor of marriages for years. In all that time, I have come to realize what makes a successful marriage. Any marriage, and I mean any marriage, that follows these ten principles will be successful. Yes, these are Christian principles. Here are the Ten Principles for a successful marriage. A summary of each will follow: - Unless God is allowed to be the Chief Architect of my marriage, I can’t get the marriage I want. (Psalms 127:1, 128:1-6) - Communication is the medium through which all love, growth, and grace must flow.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

The Three 'Magic' Questions To Save Your Marriage

For years, as a Pastor and counselor, I've had to figure out how to save someone's marriage. Here is a short formula that I use to find out where the problems may truly lie, and knowing them, I can recommend a plan on what needs to be done to fix the broken relationship. You can follow it for yourself right now. This process is best done with an impartial third party, whose sole interest is your marriage, not taking sides. However, if there is no one to do that, the couple could follow this procedure separately and then trade results.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

The Difference Between Jealousy, Covetousness, and Envy in Relationships

Many relationships have been destroyed over the jealousy issue. However, sometimes it isn't so much jealousy but envy and covetousness that is the real root of the problem. Here is a brief definition of each before we get into a lager discussion of these. Jealousy - The fear of losing something that you feel already belongs to you. Covetousness - The desire of that which is not yours and currently unattainable as it belongs to someone else or lies outside your ability to get.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

The Worst Thing You Can Do When Your Heart is Broken

When someone breaks your heart, you have an immediate tendency to do the very worst thing possible. It is almost a knee jerk reaction that often hinders your ability to heal and lengthens the time you'll hurt. This article addresses the absolute worst thing you can do when your heart is broken. You either are hurt or will have your heart broken eventually. This is the price of love. Yet when it happens to you the absolute worst thing you can do is wall yourself off from people.

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Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

What Determines How People Perceive Your Personality?

Have you ever been misunderstood, taken the wrong way, or categorized and stereotyped incorrectly? Find out why this happens and what you can do to be perceived correctly by those around you. WORDS DEFINE YOUR PERSONALITY Essentially, you define yourself to those around you by the words you use. People do judge you by the words that come out of your mouth. Your ability to communicate—or lack thereof—is what ultimately defines you in the eyes of those around you.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Kids, Christmas, and Presents in a Tough Economy

The average household will go into some sort of debt in order to keep up with their ideas of providing a good Christmas for their children. In stable economic times, it took most people six months to pay off their Christmas debt and many, around 1 in 4 according to some statistics, will still be paying off their debt by the time the next Christmas rolls around.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

The Difference Between Preaching And Teaching

What, if any, is the difference between preaching and teaching? Some preachers teach and some teachers preach. Is a lecture more preaching or a speech more teaching? I am a pastor with nearly 20 years of preaching experience. I will attempt to explain the difference. As a pastor, the difference is vital. I do teach. There is no doubt about that. But I am first and foremost a preacher of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. The truth is I do public speaking 5-7 times a week. Half of which is preaching and half of which is teaching.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Tips To Effectively Communicate In Relationships

INTRODUCTION Communication skills are not necessarily intrinsic to our nature. It is true that some people possess a talent for communication, but everyone can learn to communicate effectively with our without a natural talent to do so. It merely takes knowledge and practice. All of the tips given here are meant to be practiced and studied. Communication is much like any other skill. It must be developed. Possessing the ability to speak does not mean the possession of the skill to speak well. Communication is the cornerstone of all relationships.

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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Combating Depression By Building Self-Confidence

One of the main causes of depression is a lack of self-confidence. When we no longer believe in ourselves, we begin to fall into a pit of depression and anxiety. This is a Pastor’s take on building self-confidence. On one hand, we are all filled with some degree of insecurity. For most people, looking into the mirror is not a confidence booster, but is an exercise in self-deception as we try to ignore or explain away our own insecurities. When it comes to talent, skills, or ability, a lack of confidence in these areas often bring on a sense of inadequacy that can lead to depression.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Growing Your Church in Tough Economic Times

Every church wants to grow and reach the community. But all outreach programs and ministries cost money. The key is to develop outreach ministries that are self-supporting and self-sustaining. Our church started one that has been incredibly effective, costs us nothing except time, and even makes us a profit. Find out what we did!

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Dealing With Other People's Anger

There is a very revealing verse in the Bible that helps define the psychology of an angry person. Proverbs 22:24 Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: The warning is very poignant. Angry people are exceptionally difficult to deal with. But for many of you reading this article, you don't have the luxury of avoiding an angry person. Perhaps you are already friends with an angry person. Perhaps you're married to a person who has a short temper. Maybe one of your children has a short fuse. Dealing with an angry person is problematic at best.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

How To Build Good Character

Building good character is all about addition, not subtraction. What I mean is this: when it comes to change, our focus is usually on the aspects of our lives that are bad. We try to cut out or cut off these negative or bad qualities. We try to improve by subtraction. That is not how you build good character. It is the process of addition in your life that brings the character. In so doing, you automatically take care of the other negative aspects. As both a father and a pastor of a Church, I look for ways to continually add to the character of those I am responsible for.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

Dealing With The Pressures And Stresses Of Life

There is a difference between pressure and stress. One causes the other, and one we can reduce and shunt off. Learn the difference between these two in your life and what you can do about them. Stress is the product of pressure. Set an empty plastic water bottle upright and place the palm of your hand on the cap. Apply pressure by pressing down. The pressure is applied to the top of the bottle, but the stress will reveal itself at the weakest point in the bottle. Usually, this is halfway down the bottle at the narrow part.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

The Greatest Reason Why Marriages Struggle To Recover From Problems

Every couple will have their ups and downs. But more and more marriages struggle to recover from problems, issues, and difficulties. Many marriages survive these problems, but they don’t recover. They are like a volcano sealed with a plastic lid. It won’t hold. It will explode. But why? There are basically three reasons why marriages fail: 1. Lack of knowledge. 2. Lack of character to implement the knowledge possessed. 3. And, most important, the inner emotional wounds have never been healed. This third reason is the one that prevents marriages from recovering.

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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

How to Express Yourself to Others

One of the hardest things to do when you're communicating with someone is expressing yourself. How many times have you said something that just didn't come out the way you wanted it to? How many times have we said something that we really didn't mean, but we were too frustrated to stop it from being said? What's more, some people have a fear of expressing themselves at all. They're afraid to say something that might cost them a friendship. Or they bottle everything up tight and seize up at the mere thought of sharing their true emotions. This can be a constant struggle for people.

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Establishing Rules For Your Children

Learn how to properly establish rules for your children. Done right, you can avoid anger and resentment when you are forced to enforce your rules. Done right, your children won't fight your discipline. One of the methods that I use with my own children is contained in this article. Setting rules for your children is a fundamental part of discipline. Honestly, you have no right to discipline, or punish a child for doing something that you never made clear was wrong. That's just not fair. Shotgun discipline builds resentment in your children. Establish rules.

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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

How To Become More Intelligent

It may not be that intelligence is a measurable quality. We establish IQ scores, true, but these scores are not set in stone. Our brain is like any other muscle, if it is exercised, it grows stronger and more agile. Therefore, it may not even be accurate to assume that one person is necessarily smarter than another. With proper mental exercise and training, you could surpass someone supposedly smarter than you. Chess, for example, has been established to raise a person’s IQ level. The exercise of the brain in such intensity is bound to create a more intelligent person.

Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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By Greg BakerRecently published1 topic

What Is More Important? Your Attitude or Your Actions?

In an ideal world, we would like to see a positive attitude that promotes a productive action. But, as most parents know, we don't always get both. So what ought to be more important? The action or the attitude? As parents, should we be more conce ed with the child's attitude or, if a child performs the correct action, is that good enough?

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Instilling Good Values In Your Children

It is important to transfer your values to your children. They won't pick up on them unless taught. But for some reason we fear to do so or we don't know how. Read on to discover how you can transfer those good values to your children. “Praise the Lord! I Found One!” These are the words spoken by my 5 year old and a 3 year old as they rummage through a toy box looking for leggos. In a society and generation where God takes a back seat to political correctness and social humanism, it is refreshing to hear children reference God with such eager excitement.

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How to Prevent a Broken Heart

It seems that we've all suffered a broken heart at one time or another. The pain that it causes and brings is horrific. Few, if anyone, ever wants to go through that again. So how do you prevent it? And if we can actually do that, is it a good thing? The only sure way to prevent a broken heart is to isolate yourself 100% from every human being on the planet. It will be people who break your heart. However, attempting to stay away from people, leads to an even greater problem: A cold heart.

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Fixing a Broken Friendship

Friendship isn't a unique relationship in addition to all the other ones. In fact, friendship is more than that. When any of your relationships can become friends, then it has reached the pinnacle of that relationship. I don't have a wife, children, parents, and then friends. No, each of these other relationships has become friends too. I want to be a friend to my children, to my parents, and certainly to my wife. I married my best friend. She is my wife, but she is also my friend. But how do you repair a damaged or broken friendship?

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What Is a Real Friend?

For most people having friends is having someone who likes them. And it is true, that a friend will certainly like you, but being popular-which is the goal of most people seeking friendship-is not the same as having a real friend. If your goal is to be popular, be with the in crowd, be well known or well liked, most of your relationships will be shallow. They will come and go like a butterfly, flitting here and there without any real purpose or substance. The need to be liked is very powerful. But it is often a shallow victory to be considered with the 'in crowd'.

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Dealing With Unrealistic Expectations In Marriage

One of the great relationship destroyers is that of unrealistic expectations. Expecting something out of the relationship that the other is either ignorant of, unwilling to provide, or simply unable to provide. Frustration and anger is the result. This article deals with differing expectations and how to deal with them. Everyone has expectations. I met a guy once who argued that point. He told me that he had no expectations in life. I challenged him with, "You go to school right?

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Depression - A Societal Evolution

Depression is increasingly on the rise in our society. Its diagnosis has exploded over the last twenty years, and as a result, the medical field has responded with pill after pill. But depression isn't a disease. It can't be transmitted from person to person like the flu. So why is depression on the rise?

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The Importance of Presenting a United Front Before Your Children

Conflicting authority is the largest contributor to rebellion in children. When parents--authority--conflict it can cause rebellion in your children. You, as parents, need to have a united front for your children. Here are some tips on how this can be done. Rebellion is the result of conflicting authority. When authority can't provide a united front, it is very dangerous. There are several things you can do to provide a unified front before your kids. 1. Discuss rules and discipline together. Come to a full agreement on all aspects of it--before you implement them. 2.

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How to Maintain Realistic Expectations Within Your Relationships

Everyone enters a relationship with expectations. There is just no getting around this. Our own nature and desires form our ideas of what a good marriage means, what a friend ought to be, and even how children and parents ought to interact with each other. This article details a means of forming realistic expectations in any relationship.

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Three Reasons Why You Might Be Depressed

Here are probably the top 3 reasons why you might be feeling depressed and a little something you can do about it. All healing begins, first, with understanding the reasons. Anything else merely masks the problem, but does not solve it. As a pastor and counselor for over 15 years, I’ve had ample opportunity to study depression as time after time people have sat in my office struggling to overcome this mountain in their lives. So, first, let me unequivocally say that although I do believe that depression is affected by our physical or mental condition, it is primarily a spiritual issue.

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How Rejection Causes Depression And Social Anxiety

Rejection is one of the main causes of depression and social anxiety. Understanding why may help you combat and even overcome some of your depression and social anxieties. Rejection causes a series of emotional and spiritual issues that need to be addressed. God did not create us to be antisocial. The need for human companionship, love, acceptance, and even touch is intrinsic to our natures. Rejection, however, can subjugate those needs creating even larger and more serious issues.

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How To Express Yourself With A Letter

Writing can be an incredible outlet to expressing your emotions, feelings, and desires without necessarily causing an argument, feeling frustrated, or having your thoughts come out wrong. This article contains some tips on how to express yourself in writing. WHEN TO WRITE A LETTER

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How To Break Free From A Dead End Life

In my role as a Pastor and counselor I encounter many people who have found themselves seemingly at a dead end in life. Not only do they lack purpose—or the purpose they have is not one they sought or wanted—but they seem to blunder from disaster to disaster on a fairly consistent basis. And they can’t seem to break away from it. Every attempt to break away ends up landing them back in it. There are many, many people who have such a life.

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Our Words Define Us More Than Our Actions

We think that our actions define us more than our words. But the reality is exactly the opposite. Our actions are important, but our actions are psychologically used to verify the truth of our words and not the other way around. Be careful what you say. This article attempts to prove that your words define you more than your actions. Take a parent who says, "Do what I say and not what I do." A child looks at the action, realizes that the words are empty and vain, and doesn't listen to what you say. Interestingly, the child will hold the words against you more than the action.

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The Nature Of A Misunderstanding

Misunderstandings are perhaps the single greatest source of our arguments and fights with each other. They occur for many reasons. Understanding where they come from and how to avoid them will go a long way to strengthen relationships and avoid fights. It is important to understand what constitutes a misunderstanding. We've all experienced someone confusing our intentions with what we said. We've all had someone misquote what we said. It's frustrating. Interestingly enough, the majority of arguments begin with a misunderstanding.

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Tips On Getting Your Children To Listen To You

Getting your kids to listen to you can be a problem at times. Undoubtedly, you've tried a variety of methods from shouting, finger pointing, scowling, threatening, and the famous counting to ten. Kids seem to tune out your words if your tone is saying something else. Your tone of voice carries a tremendous amount of meaning to your children. Every child is different, of course, and you'll have to figure out exactly what will work for your unique, special, and totally different child. Here are some rules of thumb that I've found useful: 1.

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Expressing Yourself Using the Question Tree Technique

Expressing yourself is not always easy. There can be many things that go wrong when you try to express yourself. Misunderstandings are perhaps the most destructive communication mishaps in relationships. So how do you solve it? No method is perfect, especially when you are dealing with someone else's perceptions, feelings, and desires. Expressing yourself is not always easy. There can be many things that go wrong when you try to express yourself. Misunderstandings are perhaps the most destructive communication mishaps in relationships. So how do you solve it?

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Do You Have A Fear Of Embarrassment?

Making mistakes is part of life. But making mistakes in front of your peers, family, friends, or loved ones often brings a sense of embarrassment. Fearing this embarrassment will invariably cause you even more humiliation. Find out why and what you can do. Embarrassment is the natural result of believing that others see you as a fool, stupid, or even obsolete. When boiled down to its most basic component, embarrassment is a feeling of rejection. That’s right—rejection.

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Reasons Why You Feel Rejected Or Why Everyone Hates You

Ever feel that way? Do you feel that everyone hates you? As a pastor and counselor, I have encountered many people who feel this way. In looking into it, I have pinpointed a variety of causes and effects for this discouraging feeling of rejection. In knowing the causes, you may be able to combat it. Rejection is one of the leading causes of depression. People just don’t do well when they feel isolated, ostracized, and alone. In fact, it is nearly a primeval need to have human companionship or acceptance from within the circles we walk. More than that, it is a God given need.

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Symptoms of a Midlife Crisis – What Can I Do?

It is important to recognize some of the main symptoms of a midlife crisis before you can do anything about them. This article will outline the top three symptoms and what you can do. FEELINGS OF A WASTED LIFE If you are thirteen, you probably aren’t feeling like your life has been wasted—after all, too much of your life still lies before you. But if you are 50 years old you probably realize the majority of your life is over. If, upon looking back on your life, you have feelings of regret and of a wasted life you are experiencing one of the key symptoms of a midlife crisis.

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Is Jealousy Normal?

We are taught that jealousy is wrong. Indeed, it often leads to disastrous results. But is it normal? Or is it the result of some wrong thinking or wrong decisions? Find out. First, it is essential to accurately define jealousy as compared to two other terms—envy and covetousness. Since I am a pastor of a church and often deal with jealousy in relationships, I will define all three Biblically as the Bible gives the clearest distinction between the three. Covetousness – The desire of that which is not yours (Exodus 20:17, Deuteronomy 5:21).

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How To Bury A Bad Past

The greatest problem with a bad past is not that you made mistakes or did things wrong. It is that you can't go back and undo it. That is the most frustrating part about guilt and regrets. We are hands on people. We want to fix mistakes and right wrongs. But once the moment has slipped into the past, what's done is done. We can't go back and undo or even redo it. That is the problem. So the key to letting your past go is dependent on some sort of action that we can take.

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The Relationship Between Fear, Anxiety, And Depression

Ultimately, all our depression and anxiety are born out of some sort of fear or the realization of a fear. Fear, according to the Bible, brings torment. This article explores the various mental, emotional, and spiritual torments that often lead to depression and anxiety. There is a direct correlation between fear and depression. In fact, you will discover that highly depressed people often have fears that are very real to them and very near to their thinking.

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Communicating With Your Children

When communicating with children it is important to keep your goals in mind. The younger the child, the more difficult it is to reason with a child. A very young child won't be able to give you the reasoning for his actions. "Why did you hit your brother?" you demand. "Because I hit him?" your child may reply. As your child grows older, his reason and reasoning skills begin to develop. You can converse with a twelve year old in a manner impossible five years previous. So what are goals in parenting? 1.

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Three Attributes of Someone Slow to Anger

The key to control of your anger is to be slow to anger. No one can turn anger on and off like a light switch. But having a very, very long fuse is the key to anger management. There are three attributes that are common, however, to someone that is slow to anger. GRACIOUS People who have learned to be gracious are very hard to offend and are often very slow to anger. To be gracious is the ability to allow someone else to go before you. But it is more than that.

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The Main Causes of Your Irrational Anger

People often get angry and many times they don't even know why they get angry. As a counselor, I've dealt with many people who are genuinely puzzled why they got so angry. Have you ever gotten angry over something small, stupid, or just plain silly? Have you ever sat down later and felt frustration over why you got angry to begin with? This article is for you. There are two reasons why you may get angry over what may be nothing. We'll look at both of them and see what we can learn. THE FEAR OF SOMETHING I don't necessarily mean the frantic, horror film type fear.

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The Process of Healing a Broken Heart

Loss of sleep, an ache deep in the bit of your stomach, frequent tears, a heart seems to get heavier as the days go on, depression, and feelings of isolation and abandonment are all signs of a broken heart. How, if possible, do you heal from a broken heart? There is no quick fix. If you are looking for a magic wand, some spoofal dust, or something like that you won't find it. Healing from a broken heart is a process, very similar, actually, to that of grieving for a loved one that has died.r

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