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97 articles by Lynette Crane · showing 47

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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Time Zones

The wellness expert I was speaking to after her talk commented that she had almost been late for the conference. “I was stuck in traffic,” she lamented, “and I was really stressed.” I asked her what she was worried about, given that the audience was a group of very supportive women who already knew and liked her. What would they have done had she been late? She didn’t know, but insisted it was a stressful experience. Why? There would have been no dire consequences; someone else might have spoken first, or everyone would have continued to network and socialize until she appeared.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Movement is good for you

It’s now official: MOVEMENT IS GOOD FOR YOU. Oh, wait, you knew that already. And you’re doing it, right? Well, not right now, but as soon as you have time. Of course that time never seems to come. But what if regular sessions of movement actually helped create time in your life by helping you learn faster, and by making you feel more refreshed and vital so that you tackle tasks with zest and get them done quickly? Would that be a more powerful motivator for you? Or at least make you curious enough to try some of the suggestions coming from newer research on movement, such as:r

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Holiday Hints at the Buffet for the Heart-wise

The holidays are a particular challenge for those of us who know we must be vigilant every day to maintain our health through good eating. (Actually, that’s pretty much everybody.) Here are some of the challenges, and how to meet them. The holiday party, with its buffet of delectable treats, many of them high-fat – cheese plates, crackers, cookies made with real butter, rich drinks such as egg nog – can be faced and handled by using some of the following tricks:

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

You Mean Stress Is a Choice?

A week ago, I was awakened just before midnight by an alarming phone call. The security company was calling to tell me there was an alarm going off at the historic house I manage (on a purely volunteer basis), and asked if they should send a fire engine. “Yes, of course,” I gasped, surprised they would even stop to call me first. “What’s happening?” “I’ll call you back,” the voice said, and hung up. Groggy with sleep, facing a difficult day for which I was trying to be well-rested, I weighed my options.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

What is life was a multiple choice test?

If life was a multiple choice test, would you always pick the same answer? “Let’s see, it’s choice B. Guess I’ll go with that all the way.” At least in a real multiple choice test, you can see all choices – usually four – laid out and you may even ponder them before you mark your choice. In real life, we frequently act as if we see only one choice, even if we’re surrounded with more than four choices. Habit and stress conspire to make us believe there’s only once choice open to us – and we’d better take it right away, without pausing too much to think.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Recapture Delight In Your Life

What immediately comes to mind when you think of rewarding or pampering yourself? Let’s say you’ve been under a lot of pressure and you realize you must find a release. I asked a client recently what she would do if she took time to pamper herself, and she didn’t know. She hadn’t thought about it in a long time. She was too busy taking care of everyone and everything around her. In talking to overly-stressed clients over the years, I have found that, when they finally realize they can, or should, relax, the first things that come to mind are often:

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Are you listening to your body?

There’s an old story about a city slicker watching a farmer begin to train a mule. First, the farmer picked up a two-by-four and hit the mule over the head. Then he did it again … and again. The city slicker finally said, “I don’t get it. What are you trying to teach him?” The farmer replied, “I’m not trying to teach him anything yet; I’m just trying to get his attention.” Every day, your body and mind may be trying to get your attention before you have a big stress breakdown, resulting in anything from minor illness to a heart attack. Are you paying attention?

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Highly-educated, highly-intelligent people can do incredibly stupid things

Stress can make even intelligent people screw up, look slightly crazy, and even undermine their health and well-being. It’s true: even highly-educated, highly-intelligent people can do incredibly stupid things under stress. Take the woman, who upon finding that her house was on fire, grabbed what she believed to be two important objects before she rushed out- of- doors. They were an old issue of Time magazine and one slipper.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Holding on to your identity during a transition?

Maybe you shouldn’t be. Transitions – in life or in career – are tough. One of the hardest parts is the seeming attack on your identity when you no longer fill a given role, a role you may have played for years, even decades. People who have had to change careers for physical or health reasons, retirees from work to which they have dedicated years of their lives, mothers whose children have grown up and fled the nest, all struggle with this identity crisis.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Is anybody listening?

One common stressor is the feeling that we are trying to get others to understand our needs and our points of view, but somehow, no matter how hard we try, the message isn’t getting through. The solution to this stress? Try to understand the needs of your listener; then shape your communication to meet those needs. In an old sitcom, Archie Bunker stated: “Edith, do you know why we can’t communicate? Because I’m talking in English, and you’re listening in DINGBAT!”

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Feedback

How often do you criticize yourself during a given day? How often do you hold yourself back from doing or saying something because you’re afraid you will make a mistake? Then you’d receive that awful thing, criticism – if not from yourself, then from someone else. None of us wants to live in a world with no standards; what would it be like to have surgery from a surgeon who was not qualified, or to fly in a plane with a pilot who was not held to the highest standards?

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Why take a risk?

Some people take risks more readily than other people. And risks can be a little scary, whether they involve making a major career change and/or cross-country move, asking for a promotion or a raise, declaring your affection to someone else when you’re not sure how that person feels, or when it necessitates speaking up to someone whose behavior has been making you unhappy. Risks come in all sizes and shapes. The first thing to remember is that it is impossible to avoid risks - life is full of them.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

What does confidence have to do with your heart?

Confident people know when to be afraid; they then take action – to run away from the saber-toothed tiger, leave the burning building, or whatever. Unconfident, or socially anxious, people, on the other hand, are wracked by numerous anxieties over what are called “paper tigers”: fears about how they are perceived. If they speak or act, are others silently (or not so silently) going to criticize them? Do they appear foolish, awkward, unstylish…? The list goes on and on.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Are you afraid of success … or is it something else?

Has someone suggested to you that you fear success? Or have you thought it about yourself? If so, what is it you are really afraid of? I had to think about this some years ago, when I was starting out as a speaker. An enthusiastic and supportive friend of mine would say, frequently, “Maybe soon we’ll see you on Oprah’s show,” and I would shudder in horror and immediately cut back on any activities that might make me more visible.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

How not to motivate introverts?

Introverts: We’re 51% of the population, and still people don’t get who we are and how we function best. We are in your workplace as employees, colleagues, managers, bosses. We can be a family member, child, lover, or friend. We are definitely well represented among your clients and customers. Not understanding us is your loss. You may be crying out for creative, innovative thought without realizing that you have it within your circle – housed in quiet people who too often feel shut out of group processes.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Are you a highly sensitive person?

Are you one of those people who startles easily? Finds that you’re running a little too fast or being a little too conce ed at what later look like minor events? You’re not crazy, you’re not alone, and it’s not your imagination, nor is it a lack of self control, as you may have imagined (or been told). Some people just have nervous systems that react more quickly and strongly than average. This difference starts at birth and persists throughout life.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

The Power of “Yet”

When I had a heart attack a little over five years ago, I asked, “Why?” And my doctor told me that I had a high level of a rare form of cholesterol that sticks to itself and to artery walls like Velcro, making me three times more liable to have a heart attack than the average person. Furthermore, my doctor told me there was no medication, diet, or exercise - nothing I could do – that would lower this level. I felt nothing but despair. It sounded like a death sentence to me.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Introvert Anger: The Good, The Bad, and The Downright Ugly

Are you an introvert? Afraid of anger? Your own and other people’s? You’re not alone. We introverts are famous for becoming clams when we’re hurt or affronted. After all, anger can involve raised voices, threatening language – all that over-stimulation against which we try to protect ourselves. The Bad

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

What the heck is eustress?

Hans Selye, known as the “Father of Stress,” coined the term “eustress” in 1926. It means, literally, “good stress.” Is there such a thing? You bet there is. When we’re underwhelmed by life, we seek excitement in anything from scary movies to amusement park rides; we crave new ventures and exhilarating relationships. A totally stress-free life would be not only boring, but also unhealthy, and we now have scientific proof.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Does persistence really pay off?

We’ve heard these phrases all of our lives: “Persistence pays off”, “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again”, and “Success comes the day after you give up.” But are they really true? If you’re feeling tired, despondent and burned out, you may wonder just how long you have to persist before you achieve success. I used to tell my students that if you keep hitting your head against a stone wall, something’s bound to give. I wouldn’t count on it being the stone wall. Here are some guidelines for engaging in what I call “enlightened persistence.”

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Handling the stress of rejection

Rejection can cause a particularly deep form of anger, because rejection seems to carry with it a heavy load: loss of self-esteem, and even of identity. Rejection can also result in depression. Sometimes it takes this shock of rejection to make you realize that you may have been asking for toolittle in life and to get moving to do something about it. You may have settled for what you thought you could have, not what you really wanted.r

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Is relaxation time impossible for you to find?

Do you find yourself rushing all day, hoping to save some time at the end of the day in which to relax? Only to find that the time you “saved” by rushing wasn’t to be found later on? Perhaps your day is filled with “must do or else” activities that make it difficult for you to find time to slow down and take care of yourself.Here’s an “Island of Peace” you can find, even amidst that kind of chaos. Some time during your day, you must be on the move – from the office to your car, from bus stop to shop, from home to store.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

What’s in your Holiday Bucket?

Icons of black cats with arched backs are appearing everywhere, to be followed soon by turkeys in all stages, from on-the-hoof to lying down, legs in air wearing a golden brown crust. Can wreaths, holly and jolly fat men in red suits surrounded by elves be far behind? Your memory bucket is filled with all kinds of associations with these icons, and every year you try to revive the pleasant ones – all of them. Not just for yourself, but for your loved ones, too. And your to-do list is overflowing.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Social Confidence and “Extrovert Skills”

“I used my extrovert skills.” “I had to learn some extrovert skills.” “Oh, well, I don’t have extrovert skills.” I hear these phrases all the time – and they drive me crazy. When did the ability to be socially graceful or to display good manners become the sole province of one group of people, one temperament? Good social behavior is within the reach of every human being, no matter how quiet or even shy you may be. As an introvert, you may need to protect yourself from too much stimulation, but you shouldn’t protect yourself from connecting with others.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Planning to take a risk

(Last week I discussed the reasons for taking a risk, and the preparation for doing so. This week’s article continues with planned steps to gain the most from taking the risk, while minimizing the stress.) General George Patton once said,“Take calculated risks; that is quite different from being rash.”

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

The Unintended Consequences of Being an Introvert

As more and more attention is being paid to introversion, thanks to Susan Cain and her book, “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking,” the world is slowly becoming aware of introvert value and, what’s better, willing to make some adjustments to accommodate introverts and recognize our ability to make valuable contributions. For example, Steelcase, an international company providing “office furnishing solutions,” has designed a special “Susan Cain room”: a soundproofed room to which an employee can retreat for respite from the stimulus overload of a busy office.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

What If…?

When I ordered the tickets for the paddleboat cruise, I was told to bring the printed order form plus a form of picture identification. We showed up at the dock, I reached into my purse – and remembered that I had put my major credit card and driver’s license into a small pouch the previous day in order to attend an art fair – and hadn’t replaced them in my purse.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

The Best Gift of All

I was looking over the collection of greeting cards I have received over the years. All of them I treasure for one reason or another; one of them I truly cherish. It is from a friend who is very like me – in some ways. We both enjoy solitude, and can sit together companionably, reading, without having to interrupt or be entertained by the other.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

What the heck is virtual learning?

I meet people all the time who don’t really understand virtual learning, and are therefore wary of signing up for anything that is presented in this way. What a shame; there is so much expertise out there that you can access once you become familiar with this increasingly popular method of supplying information. Don’t let that wariness keep you from easily participating in events that can transform your life. It’s a dream-come-true for busy people who yearn for information to make their lives better and easier, but who don’t have time to seek out and attend the live events.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

3 Time Expansion Tips for Introvert

Introverts often feel harried, trying to rush towards that time when they can kick back and relax, freed from all social – and other—obligation. This is especially true when the introvert works in a busy organization where much of what happens is not under the introvert’s control (unlike a writer, who can have the luxury of walking through the park while mentally designing the next chapter).

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Creative Writing for RAWs

Some years ago, I called a dear friend of mine, Mary, to ask her advice. All I got was her answering machine, hour after hour. Alarmed that this usually accessible person didn’t seem to be available, I called her best friend, Amy. Together, we become more alarmed. Both of us started making calls to mutual friends, asking if they had see Mary. We then started looking at sites she might be visiting: coffee shops, cafes, stores. No Mary.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Are your Bragging Rights killing you?

“I never eat lunch,” “I work 12 hours a day,” “I only get about 4 hours of sleep a night – oh, I don’t need any more; I feel just fine.” “Weekend? What’s a weekend?” I hear these statements all the time from people whose body language and facial expressions show that they are pleased, even smug about their habits. They protest, with overly bright eyes, that they are just fine. They have drunk the kool-aid; the flavor that tells them that bad things such as heart attacks and strokes only happen to other people – old people.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Handling criticism from other people: Go for the gain and not the pain

In my previous article, I talked about the difference between feedback and criticism, and how we can handle our own inner voices more constructively. But what about those outer voices? That’s the topic of this article. Into each life a little rain must fall. Into each life a little – or sometimes a lot – of criticism will intrude. Getting criticism from others isn’t fun, even when we know it will help us improve our performance. Sometimes it doesn’t; sometimes we become so rattled that our performance deteriorates.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off…

Making a mistake or doing something klutzy can make anyone uncomfortable. Some people are more uncomfortable than others, going home, pulling the covers over their heads, and trying to sleep, haunted over and over by pictures of the embarrassing incident. Others apologize lightly and gracefully, and then seem to roll on without any noticeable psychological damage. What makes the difference? Actually, several things do. Those who handle mistakes easily are:

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Stress of Being Praised

Last week, I looked at the evaluations of a talk I had just given. One was excellent; when I glanced at the page, I realized the name of the writer. “Oh,” I remarked, “that’s just a friend.” The implication was that since the writer was a friend, there was something less valid about the praise. I had fallen into a typical error; luckily I backed out quickly.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

How can I soar with eagles when I work with turkeys?

I remember this sign in an organization for which I worked years ago, and when I thought of some of my colleagues, I laughed in recognition. Much later, I recognized that some of them probably had my face in mind when they looked at the sign and laughed. The expression refers to someone (me, of course) who would be a high performer in this environment, if it were not for the underperforming people around one. In fact, it often describes people who are doing something so annoying that we feel frustrated and avoidant. Here are some common turkey behaviors.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

A New Year, a New Life

January is the time of fresh starts, fresh ideas, and an urge to create a new, better life.Often, we start out with high hopes, only to sink by February 1 as if the balloon carrying our hopes had been punctured. We need a plan, a roadmap if you will, that we can follow, that will provide us with a vision, a plan, and benchmarks that help us say to ourselves, “Yes, I am moving towards what I desire.” Here is my roadmap to creating a new, exciting life:

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

How to Avoid Holiday Stress Insanity

Along with joy and a feeling of connectedness to others, the holidays bring a rise in stress. Although most people over 30 experience a rise in stress over the holidays, according to the American Psychological Association, women are most likely to experience a sharp increase (44%) in stress, versus a 30% rise for men, as the bulk of the shopping, decorating and food preparation tends to fall on women.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Let a smile be your umbrella

November can bring gloomy days, rain, and even snow. Some people love this autumn weather; others are less enchanted by it. Add in a few ordinary life mishaps and you can create deep gloom. Here’s how to lift the gloom when you’re suffering from the “grumpies”, a discontented feeling that arises from a series of a series of small, unpleasant episodes that you are in danger of inflating into a really bad mood: Sit or lie down; take several of those deep belly breaths.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Is Tech Stress Driving You Screaming Mad?

It’s official (in case you hadn’t already noticed): technology is raising our stress level precipitously. In fact, Mike Kushner, co-owner of a computer solutions company in Palo Alto, Califo ia, has paramedics ready to respond to calls from what he calls the “digitally desperate.” Some of that desperation is created because the hardware malfunctions.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

Two small steps towards speaking confidence

If you are one of those people who feels uncomfortable about speaking up in group settings, take heart. It is possible to learn to be a relaxed contributor. One of my early clients said, “Oh, I know what you’re going to say – just take a deep breath and force yourself.” Well, no, actually. That’s a little like telling someone the best way to learn to swim is to jump off the dock and hope some life-saving instincts kick in.

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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By Lynette CraneRecently published1 topic

How Stress Makes You Stupid …and what you can do about it!

Stress makes you stupid. It sooner or later makes all of us stupid. I can prove it. So can you. Think back to the last time you rushed get to the post office before it closed to mail a package, only to discover when you got there that the package was back on your desk; or rushing to an appointment, you parked your car, and then came back later to discover you couldn’t remember where you had parked it. Be honest – how many times has this happened to you?

Primary topic: Life Coach and Life Coaching
Life Coach and Life Coaching
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